用自己的好习惯去影响家人 | Influence Family Members with Good Habits
语言是低级的表达方式，所以古德修行都不怎么讲话，就在砍柴担水中。靠言语去说服一个人是非常难的，除非对方对自己有很强的信心，默默的行动更有说服力。任何一方想要去改变别人，强迫别人接受自己的道理，会使得双方都痛苦。
Language is a low-level form of expression. That’s why the ancient Buddhist achievers rarely spoke in their practice. Cultivation was in chopping firewood and carrying water. It is very difficult to convince someone by words, unless the other person trusts you very much. Actions without words are more convincing. Any party who attempts to change others or force others to accept their rationale will make both parties suffer.
如果家人行为不当，言教不如身教，用自己的好习惯去影响家人。真诚付出，时时用心，处处行善，坚持不懈。人的内心最终会转变。
If family members misbehave, it is better to teach them through examples than lectures. Influence family members with good habits. With persistence in sincere dedication, loving care and good deeds，they will eventually transform themselves from within.
If we place family harmony instead of our own feelings in the first place, then many problems can be easily solved. On the contrary, if we focus too much on our own feelings, care about only our own happiness and suffering, and set out our own rationales, then we may end up having more suffering.
人都活在业力和烦恼的牢笼中，身不由己，与其去怨恨现在的果相，不如从自己开始种正因。从净化自己的业开始，帮助改善家庭的共业；努力增长自己的善良与智慧，去温暖身边的人。
We all live in the cage of karma and affliction and cannot do much about it. It is better to plant good seeds than to hold grudges against the current outcome. By cleansing our karma, we can help change the collective karma in our family. By increasing our kindness and wisdom, we can bring warmth to the people around us.
来源：学诚法师的微博
Source：Microblogs of Ven. Master Xuecheng
翻译：北京龙泉寺翻译中心
Translated by: Beijing Longquan Monastery Translation Center