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This article comes from Date Night China (WeChat ID: datenightchina), your guide to dating in China, from love to lust, first dates to worst dates, hilarious stories, and top tips to avoid (or steer into) disaster. Single in the city? Listen to their podcast.
Love is a universal language and, sometimes, the bane of our existence. Throughout the ages, love has been the subject of countless songs, pieces of fine art, movies, novels, philosophical discourse, and conversations between friends. It’s a major part of being. Since the creation of the internet, the quickest way to see how infatuated we are with love is to do a Google, Bing, or Baidu search.
When it comes to flirting and pick-up lines in Mandarin Chinese, the number of blog posts, YouTube videos, forum board discussions (that’s still a thing!?), and Chinese language learning resources all chatting about, explaining, and analyzing love, pick-up lines and flirting is overwhelming. In this two-part post, we will be adding to the information overload with our own blurb on some of the top, cringe-worthy pick-up lines and typical flirting tactics when flirting in Mandarin Chinese. The more the merrier!
Pick-up lines are either hit or miss. Usually, miss. But when they’re well-thought-out, super witty, and show a level of originality and an acute sense of humor, it’s a surefire way to spark a conversation.
However, this usually isn’t the case. More often than not, pick-up lines in any language are overused way past their prime with little variation.
In Mandarin Chinese, these groan-inducing da shan (搭讪 dā shàn v. to hit on sb.) tactics are referred to as tǔ wèi qínghuà (土味情话). When directly translated into English, tǔ wèi qínghuà (土味情话) would be dirt flavored sweet nothings, which, if you’ve ever been on the receiving end, is pretty spot-on: they do leave a weird, mental discomfort, dirt-like aftertaste and are definitely empty calories.
To separate the phrase into its parts:
Qínghuà (情话) means lovers’ banter or sweet nothings. It is the sappy chatter between lovebirds that either puts giddy butterflies in your stomach when you’re one of the two or makes you want to puke when you’re the third wheel (当/做电灯泡 dāng/zuò diàndēngpào).
1. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
你从天上掉下来的时候疼不疼?
Nǐ cóng tiānshàng diào xiàlái de shíhòu téng bù téng?
This one is arguably the most quintessential, textbook example of a pick-up line in any language. From movie dialogues, song lyrics, and a plethora of memes, to cite a few examples, this cheesy one-liner has made the rounds in both Western pop culture and Singles’ Nights to the chagrin of many. In China, this angelic conversation starter is also an overused 泡妞术语 (pàoniū shùyǔ n. pick-up lines) of novice PUAs (Pick-up-artist).
2. Your dwelling, my heart!
A:你在哪儿住?
A: Nǐ zài nǎ'er zhù?
A: Where do you live?
B:我在XXX住。
B: Wǒ zài XXX zhù.
B: I live at/in XXX.
A: 不, 你住在我心里.
A: Bù, nǐ zhù zài wǒ xīnlǐ.
A: No, you live in my heart.
It hasn’t been scientifically tested, but I’m pretty sure you can develop diabetes from this high fructose corn syrup of a come-on. Another phony question ending at the heart, this one will leave the person you’re trying to win over lost on the direction of the conversation. I suggest making a hard left and just giving a genuine compliment instead.
Besides being questioned about where I lived and being corrected that it wasn’t an apartment in Beijing’s inner city, but instead inside a vital organ, another line that was overused by people I matched with on Tantan was this one. It’s a nice compliment the first few times, but, after the 25th time of insincerely being asked about what you do just so they can call you a beautiful woman (美女 měinǚ), it gets old.
5. The Flame That Fuels a Burning Passion
A:请问,你有打火机吗?
A: Qǐngwèn, nǐ yǒu dǎhuǒjī ma?
A: Excuse me, do you have a light?
B:没有。
B: Méiyǒu.
B: No.
A: 那你是怎么点燃我的心的?
A: Nà nǐ shì zěnme diǎnrán wǒ de xīn de?
A: Then how did you ignite my heart?
Now that you’ve been exposed to five of the best worst pick-up lines, get out there and make unknowing targets blush, chuckle, and internally cringe. In the second part of this two-part post about pick-up lines and flirting in Mandarin Chinese be ready to move to second base by developing your flirting skills.
A lover of all things China, Rochelle is a typical Sinophile and has previously written professionally about contemporary Chinese culture and Mandarin Chinese for past employers, study abroad organizations, and other China-focused media outlets.
READ: Date Night China: An American Woman's Experience Using Tantan in Beijing
Images: Jonathan J. Castellon (via Unsplash), Date Night China
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