The Meaning Behind the Hongbao We All Know and Love
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It’s that time of year again: when red is the color lighting up every shop on every street in Beijing. The heaps and heaps of fu (福) characters and lanterns are just a sneak peek of the coming festival that holds a special place in every Chinese person’s heart. If you look at the stacks of Chinese New Year goods on display, you’ll be sure to find some of the red and golden hongbaos we all know and love.
My mom and I have a tradition of going to the movies every weekend. With Chinese New Year just around the corner, it’s no surprise that this week we watched something celebratory. Big Red Packet (大红包 dà hóng bāo) is a comedy film that was just released in China. It tells the story of a man attempting to earn back all the hongbaos he gave away by hosting a fake wedding. Although this is a pretty extreme example, it did get me thinking about what people do with all that hongbao money and the values behind giving them.
In the movie, one of the characters defines hongbao as “an expression of love to one’s friends and family.” In the case of my family, hongbaos are a necessity at every family reunion, particularly Chinese New Year. I’ve always been on the receiving end of these expressions of love. My earliest impression of them was distant relatives handing shiny packets to me and me being too young to comprehend what I had been given. In the same way that you see friends arguing over who pays the bill at a restaurant, my parents would always try to give the money back and end up in a back and forth exchange. In the end, they would cave and accept the hongbao.
Just like that, in every year of my childhood, my hongbao money went to my parents. They tucked it away in a drawer somewhere, never to be found again. But when I turned 13, all of that changed. Red packets on WeChat were emerging as a new trend. I remember my grade’s group chat being spammed with hongbaos every Chinese New Year, with whoever opened them first getting the money — as we say in Chinese, “抢红包” (aka battle of the red packet). I even made two WeChat accounts to double my chances. When I was done with that, I would move on to helping my parents earn hongbaos in their countless group chats.advertisement
Lest you think me greedy, the real beauty about receiving these hongbaos was that the more I earned, the more I gave away. I fought long and hard to open all the red packets just so I could send the money back and watch friends and family race to be the first as well.
Since then, I’ve spent most of my time living abroad, where friends and family could no longer give me physical hongbaos. I was also growing up, and my position as the youngest in the extended family was slowly being replaced. Nevertheless, there was one person who remained committed to sending me hongbaos — my Grandma. Initially, every time I flew back to Guangzhou to visit my dad’s side of the family, she would prepare a good old-fashioned red envelope and stuff it in my suitcase without me noticing. But soon, she hopped on the technology bandwagon and started sending them via WeChat. I remember waking up to her red packets every birthday, Christmas, and of course, Chinese New Year. At that time, she had yet to figure out how to send virtual hongbaos herself, so she asked my uncle to do the sending.
While I was abroad, I couldn’t use WeChat pay, so all the money just accumulated in my account, waiting to be spent. Even though I’m now back in China and able to spend WeChat money freely, every time I scan a code to make a purchase, I’m still reminded of the place of love that this money came from. Today, I mostly use the money for daily necessities such as buying school lunch or topping up my subway card.
Last month, I flew to Guangzhou and finally taught my Grandma how to send WeChat hongbaos herself. After a couple of demonstrations, she managed to send her first-ever online red packet. It was the happiest I’d ever seen her.
Moments like these are the essence of what hongbaos stand for. Giving a hongbao is more than just a polite gesture or a cultural tradition. And it’s certainly far beyond its economic worth. In fact, just like the movie Big Red Packet said, it’s an expression of love for your friends and family, one so warm that it can withstand any distance and defy generation gaps.
It’s funny how we give gifts for birthdays and Christmas, yet on Chinese New Year we simply give money. I’ve always secretly believed this is done because money is something that people devote their entire lives to and risk everything for, and there is no better expression of love than to set aside all selfishness and egoism to make an object so tainted and complicated mean something so simple and pure.READ: A Beginner's Guide to Headphone's Shopping
Image: UNSPLASH
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