收藏！被哈佛相中的Essay范文
原籍: 美国北卡州
高中: 公立高中, 50毕业生
民族: 西语裔
性别: 女性
GPA: 4.98 out of 5.0
SAT / ACT: 35
SAT2: Mathematics Level 2, Physics
课外活动: Research, founding science fair mentoring director, founding Editor-in-Chief of student newspaper, beach volleyball, fundraising artist
获奖: Intel International Science and Engineering Fair Finalist, US Public Health Surgeon General's Special Science Award, National Hispanic Scholar, Jack Kent Cooke Semifinalist, Wayne Hanson Excellence in Science or Engineering Award
专业: Math
My father said I didn’t cry when I was born. Instead, I popped out of the womb with a furrowed brow, looking up at him almost accusatorially, as if to say “Who are you? What am I doing here?” While I can’t speak to the biological accuracy of his story — How did I survive, then? How did I bring air into my lungs? — it’s certainly true that I feel like I came preprogrammed with the compulsion to ask questions.
I received my first journal in preschool, probably because my parents were sick of cleaning my crayon drawings off my bedroom wall. Growing up, my notebooks became the places where I explored ideas through actions in addition to words. If the face I was sketching looked broody, I began to wonder what in her life made her that way. Was she a spy? Did she just come in from the cold? Graduating from crayons to markers to colored pencils, I layered color upon color, testing out the effects of different combinations, wondering why the layering of notes in music filled me with the very same happiness as the sight of the explosion of paired colors beneath my hands.
I began to take notes, on anything and everything. Reading Steve Martin’s Born Standing Up, I took away lessons on presentations, of maintaining a rhythm and allowing crescendos of energy to release every so often. While watching a documentary on people preparing for a sommelier exam, I made note of the importance of an enriching environment where most everything points you to your goals. Flipping through my old journal, I see that even an article about trouble in the South China Sea inspired notes on precedent and maintaining tradition lest you provoke the unknown. I was looking for the rules of the world.
More than just a place to catalogue my observations about the world, my notebooks are places to synthesize, to course-correct, to pinpoint areas for iterative improvement. When the words are down on paper, I see my patterns of thought and the holes in my logic stark against the white page. If I have a day of insecurity that leads to a sudden rush of journaling characteristic of that in a teen movie, looking down at the angsty scribbles, I'll recognize my repeated thoughts and actions and look for pressure points in that system of behavior where I can improve.
Now my 2016 notebook returns to exploring the world through actions and experiments. Dozens of doughnut-shaped sketches dot pages that ask “how would you play tic-tac-toe on a torus?” Another page containing bubble letters answers the simpler question of the result of sorting these figures into groups of topological equivalences. Not two pages later are the results of a research binge on Mersenne primes that took me through perfect numbers and somehow deposited me at a Wikipedia page detailing the mathematical properties of the number 127. Once again, I look for the rules of the world.
Whenever I feel discouraged, I look to my stack of notebooks, shelved neatly by my desk. In those pages I’ve learned that I have room to fail and grow, to literally turn over a new leaf if a problem is particularly tricky. Through years of scribbling away, I’ve learned that the most fundamental part of my development has been giving myself the space to try: to sketch mangled faces, to draw the wrong conclusions, to answer a question incorrectly, and to learn from my mistakes without shame. I look to that mass of notebooks filled with my ideas, my mistakes, and my questions, and I'm reminded that I’ve grown before, and that I’ll grow again, all the while asking questions.
玛丽娜（Marina）的开场白立即吸引了读者的注意，尽管没有立即看出与主题有何联系，直到讲述她的小品表演。从学前班开始，她通过记录趣事来保存笔记本。尽管她的文章像是浪漫的散文，但她避免了跑题。
当她翻阅笔记本时，她追踪她的思考过程——从最初收集信息到最终合成并建立在她的观察上。尽管在第三段中所记笔记的例子在增加细节和重复之间多走了一步，但它们加深了读者对笔记本的理解。我们注意到她表现出成长的心态，因为她指出她将笔记本用作处理思想和寻找需要改进的地方。
玛丽娜（Marina）以一篇积极的，扎实的笔记结束了她的文章，使作文的内容更进一步显示了她成长的心态。她的结束语回到 “提问” 一词，展示了一幅完整的图像，强调了文章的主题。
全美唯一保送普渡大学的项目！
先在国内修线上学分课，
入学难度大大降低！
原籍: 美国费城
高中: 私立高中, 84毕业生
民族: 混血（多种族）
性别: 男性
GPA: n/a
SAT / ACT: n/a
SAT2: U.S. History, World History
课外活动：Cross country / indoor track / outdoor track captain, newspaper editor in chief, literary magazine editor, Monday Series — speaking series and publication founder and editor, Student Religious Life Committee chair, Student Council, Obama 2012 campaign organizer
获奖: Award as top community organizer in country for the Obama 2012 campaign; State champion in the cross country, 4 years in a row
专业: History and Literature
When I broke the news to my volunteer team, we were in a church basement, cleaning up after the final event of the summer. I tried to downplay it. I nudged Ms. Diana, the neighborhood leader, in the shoulder, and said, "Guess what I'll be doing next Wednesday — having lunch with the president." Her face blazed with a kilowatt smile. Before I could slow her down, she shouted, "Christopher's meeting President Obama next week."
Eldred dropped his broom, Ms. Sheila left the cups scattered on the floor, and all the others came running over and fusilladed me with questions. Yes, the campaign had chosen me from all the other summer organizers. Yes, I would bring photos for everyone. And yes, we had the strongest team by the numbers — total calls, knocks, voters registered, and events — in the country.
I felt guilty that only I could go and told them so. "I wish that I could bring you all with me. You made nearly all of the calls, brought your friends and family along, and made this what it is. I've just been here to facilitate." The others good-naturedly shouted me down. Then Ms. Melva spoke up. Her words were pressed out against the heaving of her respirator. "Christopher, don't feel bad. You'll bring us wherever you go in your pocket. Just pull us out when you meet Barack."
For a long time, I was perplexed by her advice. Then I thought back to the exercise that we employed before any volunteer activity. We sat in a circle and gave our reasons for being in the room, willing to work with the campaign. That way, when it came time to make our "hard ask" on the phones, we would be supported by personal conviction and shared purpose. The "hard ask" is the Obama campaign's tactic for garnering support or a commitment to volunteer, moving from values to idealism to specific action.
In my work on the campaign, I am reminded of my cross-country coach, Rob. Before every single race, from petty league meets to national championships, Rob taps the spot on his thigh where a pocket would be. We look at our teammates who are lining up with us and tap the same spot. Coach Rob is reminding us, and we're reminding each other, that we carry "the bastard" in our pockets with us throughout the race.
"The bastard in your pocket" is a metaphor for the sum of our efforts to succeed as runners. "The bastard" exists as a sort of Platonic ideal form of the high school cross-country runner, melded from accrued mileage and mental conditioning. My goal in a race is to take this ideal form and to transform it into a reality that lives on the course.
I want an education that fills my pockets. And, perhaps more importantly, an education that prompts hard asks, that demands us to use "the bastard" and that uses the compounded experiences of a group for a single purpose.
通过他的志愿工作和跨国经验的两个例子，克里斯托弗（Christopher）展示了他对领导力的细微而深刻的理解以及对团队合作的真诚奉献。
在开头的几段中，他描述了他与志愿者团队邀请总统见面的消息相关的那一刻。此刻表明克里斯托弗作为奥巴马竞选的夏季组织者所做的努力达到了顶点。提及邀请是对可证明和令人印象深刻的领导力的确认；此外，通过提及其团队成员的名字表明他的工作是有意义的和个人的。
在整篇文章中，克里斯托弗都表达了他对组建社区和成为社区一部分的热情，这既是其目标，也是团队取得成功的一种方式。他在提到“口袋里的杂种”时阐述了这一点，他提出了这一理想，并将其转变为行动，作为他志愿工作和越野跑的实例。他引用了越野跑教练的话，用这个例子来扩展他对社区和生活经验的看法。他强调了自己在将信念和观念转变为切实成果方面的成功。文章的最后一段是一个简洁而有力的结论，该结论将他所寻求的那种教育经验与他坚定的、实现目标的心态联系在一起。
加拿大曼省留学生移民项目
移民政策好 英语门槛低
项目周期短 省时省学费
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原籍: 美国加州
I’m a bit of a grandma. I don't wear horn rimmed spectacles, nor perch on a rocking chair, and I certainly wish I carried hard candies in my backpack. However, I do enjoy baking: butter sizzling as it glides across heated metal like a canoe across a glassy lake; powdered sugar fluttering through the air like glitter from a confetti cannon. Some consider themselves math, literature, or history nerds. I rifle through cookbooks, browse the internet for ingenious new recipes, and revel in this year’s birthday gift: a copy of “Bread Illustrated.”
My greatest achievement in elementary school was not the perfect score on a spelling test, but the first time I mastered a batch of cookies that didn’t bear a rigidity comparable to steel. To my parents’ bewilderment, I dismissed Barbies, yo-yo’s, and jump ropes in favor of a wire whisk: It was love at first sight.
Why do I bake? Sometimes it’s to thank a friend or reconnect with former colleagues, employers, and teachers. Just as often, it’s the intricate processes involved. Creating the exacting liaison between eggs and flour to create a pâte à choux is, for me, a form of meditation. And sometimes I bake to reflect and even gain insight into my other interests.
Baking pastries for my next Junior Commission meeting, I ruminated on my interviews with officers and local homeless regarding their direct experiences with human trafficking in my own community. I recalled a police detective telling me, “For a youth isolated from family and friends, it doesn’t take much to accept the exploitation because he believes trafficking is his only chance of survival. I remember thinking, “Except that your body has to be sold like a box of cereal at Safeway?” This inspired my exhibit that was presented at high schools in my county, in which a figure, made up of barcodes, stands silhouetted against a black background.
Then there was the time my political interests literally gave me food for thought. As a Senate page, I welcomed Senators and staff back from their Independence Day recess with choux à la crème, that perfect French amalgam of wheat, egg, butter and air we call cream puffs. I had cherry-picked the ingredients from a local farmer’s market, because local and organic is more than just a trend for me; it means contributing to the reduction of food miles and supporting small businesses rather than Big Agra. Ironically, activists that day chose to protest an aggressively lobbied pro-GMO bill by showering the Senate floor with dollar bills. Senators and staff brushed them off of their jackets while gingerly stepping around them to navigate the room.
But the elephant in the room wasn’t the litter of currency, but the senators who paid more attention to corporate lobbyists than the protesters exposing their corruption. It deepened my perspective on how politics intersects our lives, farm to table. Yet, I’ve realized that when I feel empowered to advocate for a cause, I need to remember how the audience — legislators, for example — might view both my side and the opposing side. Sometimes they see us both as intruding groups. Other times, there are unseen advantages to acting in agreement with one side over the other or coming to a compromise.
劳拉（Laura）以独特一句话的开头，一下子就吸引了招生官的注意。接着她绘制了一幅引人入胜的场景，将读者带进她的生活，同时又增加了对烘焙的兴趣和真实性。劳拉在童年时期就感到自豪的是，她第一次烤饼干获得成功，这将她与专注于其他兴趣的同龄人区别开来。
通过引用烘焙作为与他人联系的一种方式，劳拉将自己视为更大社区的一部分——招生官很高兴看到这一点。此外，劳拉将探索烘焙作为一种思考形式，展示了她深思熟虑的本性。她写道：“在鸡蛋和面粉之间建立精确的联系……是一种思考形式。”
写作烘焙是 “了解我的其他兴趣” 的一种方式，是充实她的其他兴趣的元件——如果写砸了，就会被看成是虚假的，但在本文中却是自然而然的。劳拉在烘烤中看到了自己社区中的不幸者，她展示而不是告诉人们她如何将烘烤作为一种思考方式。最后，她将对烘焙的热情与更广阔的世界联系在一起，强调了对烘焙的热情如何统一了她的思维方式。
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