Brush up on Chinese Gift Giving Faux Pas
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‘Tis the season of giving, but only if you do it correctly. While your intentions behind giving your Chinese friend a holiday gift might be thoughtful, gift-giving culture in China is different from the West, and sometimes, we unknowingly give offensive gifts.
For example, in the US, I was taught not to give perfume as a gift because it could be misconstrued as telling the person they’re smelly. But here, perfumes are a perfectly acceptable gift, while other seemingly innocent items are not.
Before you start wrapping gifts for the holiday season, take a look at which gifts not to give in China and get yourself acquainted with the gift-giving/receiving culture here.
Gifts
Red Envelopes
The most popular gift for the holiday season is a hongbao (红包), a red envelope filled with money. Everybody likes a bit of extra cash and it’s a perfectly acceptable (and preferred) gift for holidays and special occasions like weddings. The only thing to keep in mind is that in China, numbers have different implications. Here, 666 has nothing to do with satan. In China, six is a lucky number. Four (四 sì), on the other hand, is a number to avoid, as it sounds like the character for death (死 sǐ). That is why the number four is avoided in phone numbers, license plates, and addresses. For addresses that do contain fours, the rent is usually less. Over the years, I’ve learned to always have a few extra hongbao on me at all times during the holiday season, especially when attending parties. The last thing I want to see is the disappointment in a little kid’s eyes when they realize that all the other kids got a hongbao but because their parents forget to RSVP them they have to miss out on the fun.
Clocks
Clocks should just be avoided as gifts in China in general. While a nice watch is ok with the younger generation, the older generation will be offended by anything remotely time-related. In Chinese to give a clock (送钟 sòng zhōng) sounds like sòng zhōng (送终), a funeral ritual.
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Umbrellas
In Chinese, the word for umbrella is sǎn (伞), which sounds like the word for separation, sàn (散). Give an umbrella and you’re implying you either want to end the friendship or break up.
Shoes
While Jimmy Choo might be having its end of year sale, giving shoes as a gift isn’t popular in China. The Chinese word for shoes is xié (鞋), which is pronounced exactly the same way as the Chinese character for evil (邪 xié). However, it’s completely fine to give shoes as gifts if they’re for immediate family.
Flowers
It’s always nice to bring flowers to a party for the host, but there is one flower that you must avoid — chrysanthemums. In China, these flowers are usually used to honor the deceased and tend to only be seen at funerals.
Always Bring a Gift
No matter what country you’re from, it’s good manners to always bring a gift for the host when you’re visiting their home. If your hosts drink alcohol, they’ll appreciate a nice bottle of whatever it is they like most. Boxed loose leaf tea is always a nice gesture and a fruit basket is a ubiquitous symbol of Chinese New Year. Giving a box of oranges or a box of apples is also welcomed, as they symbolize safety and fortune, respectively. Sweets, nuts, and the ever-popular Ferrero Rocher also make good gifts.
Gift Wrapping
Minimalist designs may be all the rage right now, but when it comes to wrapping gifts, your local friends are going to prefer more traditional red or gold-colored wrapping as it symbolizes luck, fortune, and wealth.
Gift Giving/Receiving Etiquette
When giving or receiving a gift, always do it with both hands. It’s a sign of politeness and respect.
Do not unwrap your gift right then and there. Here it’s considered impolite to unwrap a gift in front of the gift giver. Unless otherwise specified, wait until you get home.
No doesn’t mean no when it comes to gifts. Often people will refuse to accept a gift, so if someone turns down your gift, insist that they accept it a few more times before you give up.
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Photos: Unsplash, pexels, ikyspp.nus.edu.sg
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