Love in the Time of Corona: Jim & Jen’s Expat Love Story
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Jim Tsai (36) and Jen Fornek (33) are picture-perfect modern expats. Highly educated, successful, open-minded, and adventurous. They had unknowingly been circling around each other for years, living in the same cities and working as engineers for the same company but somehow never actually meeting. That is until fate intervened one night in Ulsan, Korea. Jen was being transferred there and was on her go-see trip. According to their wedding website, what followed was destiny fueled by ice cream and soju.
“Jen took a one-week business trip to Ulsan in September 2015. As luck would have it, she came down with a nasty cold just days before the trip. Surviving on decongestants, Jen was meeting the team and learning about the new place she would soon call home. Part of that 'learning' meant an inaugural trip to Lighthouse, a local watering hole the expat crew frequented for happy hour. Jen wasn't feeling great, but she also has serious FOMO, so she agreed to go for one drink…
As Jen was about to leave, in strolled Jim with a soft-serve ice cream cone in hand. Who was this guy? ... One drink turned into a group dinner where Jim conveniently sat next to Jen and showed off his Korean BBQ skills. The soju was flowing and so was the conversation. Brimming with liquid courage, the entire group decided there was only one thing left to do... karaoke!!
After just one night, the chemistry was instant and undeniable, but Jen was still months away from actually moving to South Korea! Luckily that wasn't going to stop Jim. Over the next three months, he made communication a priority, sometimes waking up in the middle of the night, while Jen bounced from timezone to timezone until she finally landed in Korea – Dec 31, 2015 – ready to kick start a new year and a new adventure with Jim by her side!”
Fast forward to 2019 and they were living together in Texas when Jim suggested they take a bike ride.
“I was a bit surprised because Jim isn’t big on physical activity that doesn’t involve golfing, but I was here for it!” says Jen.
Unfortunately, the weather was not cooperating and it started to rain. Jen suggested turning back but Jim was insistent. Soaking wet and admittedly a little angry, Jen reached into her bag when they stopped at a secluded spot for a rest. As she looked up Jim was holding a ring box. “My initial reaction was a combination of 'oh my gosh this happening!' and 'oh, now this whole bike ride in the rain is starting to make sense.'”
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They began planning the wedding in Jen’s hometown of Chicago but by May 2020 Covid had been declared a national emergency, so they made the decision to err on the side of caution.
“Everything that couldn’t be refunded was rebooked for September 2021. Surely in a year and a half, we would be able to have our wedding as planned," Jen says with a sarcastic laugh.
A few weeks later they found out they were being sent to a project in Beijing.
“We decided that even without the pomp and circumstance of a big wedding, it was important to us to be legally married before the move. So, on our original planned wedding date, we eloped…[with] just our immediate families and a few very close friends. And to be honest, even though the day wasn’t what we had originally planned, it was still a dream.”
A year later with Covid still underway and the new wedding date approaching, the couple decided not to delay any further. With family support and an excellent wedding planner, they made arrangements for the big day from the other side of the world. They negotiated with work for the time off, got vaccinated, made sure all their guests were vaccinated, and flew home knowing that at the very least they would need to do a three-week quarantine upon return – if they were allowed to return at all.
Was it worth the risk? “That moment – Jim waiting at the end of the aisle, my father at my side, my extremely talented brother singing, surrounded by all of our family and friends who couldn’t be there in July 2020 and whom we hadn’t seen in well over a year – it was a moment, at times, we thought we might never experience. But now, it is a moment we will never forget.”
They returned to Beijing for quarantine. “It was not the honeymoon we had envisioned. Jokes aside, we were happy to be able to quarantine together in the same room. There were some logistical challenges. We were both back to work during the quarantine period, so we had to coordinate our calendars to avoid scheduling/joining Zoom meetings at the same time. There were also occasional phone calls taken from the bathroom, the only place to get any separation/privacy.”
Throughout the entire process, they have kept their sense of humor. When I asked what the biggest surprise about marriage was they explain, “I don’t think either of us expected to get married twice, to the same person, during a global pandemic.”
They now look forward to traveling as newlyweds once borders reopen and eventually starting a family together. As for other expat couples attempting to plan a wedding from across the ocean, Jen warns, “don’t do it… especially not during a pandemic! But if you can’t [avoid it], my biggest advice is to give yourself ample time and do not be afraid to ask for help.”
Images: Jen Fonek
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