TED学院 | 一位女权主义者的忏悔

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TED简介：2015 | Roxane Gay是位女权主义者，但是她认为自己不是一个好的女权主义者，所以她要忏悔。在这次TED演讲台上，她和大家分享她的经历和她忏悔的原因。同时，她倡导社会大众都来关注和爱护女性，以及如何才能做个好的女权主义维护者。

演讲者： Roxane Gay 

片长：11：33

https://v.qq.com/txp/iframe/player.html?width=500&height=375&auto=0&vid=v0355pxejvc

中英对照翻译

I am failing as a woman, I am failing as a feminist.

作为一个女人我很失败，作为一个女权主义者我也很失败。

I have passionate opinions about gender equality, but I worry that to freely accept the label of "feminist," would not be fair to good feminists.

我非常支持性别平等，但是我会担心，如果我坦然接受“女权主义者”这个称号，对那些优秀的女权主义者不公平。

I'm a feminist, but I'm a rather bad one. Oh, so I call myself a Bad Feminist. Or at least, I wrote an essay, and then I wrote a book called "Bad Feminist," and then in interviews, people started calling me The Bad Feminist. (Laughter)

我是一个女权主义者，但我是一个相当不称职的女权主义者。哦, 所以我叫我自己“一个不良女权主义者”。或者至少，我写过一篇文章，又写了一本书，叫《坏女权主义者》，然后在采访中，大家开始叫我“那个坏女权主义者”。

So, what started as a bit of an inside joke with myself and a willful provocation, has become a thing.

所以，这个一开始跟自己开的玩笑，带着对自己故意的挑衅，变成了一个实在的东西。

Let me take a step back. When I was younger, mostly in my teens and 20s, I had strange ideas about feminists as hairy, angry, man-hating, sex-hating women -- as if those are bad things. (Laughter)These days, I look at how women are treated the world over, and anger, in particular, seems like a perfectly reasonable response.

退一步讲，我年轻的时候，大概青少年时期，我对女权主义者有些奇怪的误解。比如她们体毛很多，易怒，憎恨男性，憎恨性，就好像她们是不好的东西。现在，我看到了这个世界如何对待女性，似乎愤怒是最合理的回应。

But back then, I worried about the tone people used when suggesting I might be a feminist. The feminist label was an accusation, it was an "F" word, and not a nice one. I was labeled a woman who doesn't play by the rules, who expects too much, who thinks far too highly of myself, by daring to believe I'm equal -- (Coughs) -- superior to a man. You don't want to be that rebel woman, until you realize that you very much are that woman, and cannot imagine being anyone else.

但是在以前，当人们在暗示我，我是一个女权主义者的时候，他们的语气让我担心。女权主义者这个标签更像是一种指控。这是一个以“F”开头的词，而且不是个“好”的词。我被打上“不按规则来”，“期待的太多”，“自我感觉太好”的女性的标签，仅仅是因为我敢于去相信，我和男人一样优秀。直到意识到你就是这样的，并且不敢去想象变成别的样子，你才会想要做这样一个反叛的女性。

As I got older, I began to accept that I am, indeed, a feminist, and a proud one. I hold certain truths to be self-evident: Women are equal to men. We deserve equal pay for equal work. We have the right to move through the world as we choose, free from harassment or violence. We have the right to easy, affordable access to birth control, and reproductive services. We have the right to make choices about our bodies, free from legislative oversight or evangelical doctrine. We have the right to respect.

当年龄渐长，我开始去接受，我确实是一个女权主义者，并且为之自豪。我秉持着这样的信念：男女平等。我们应该享受同工同酬。我们有权利以自己想要的方式在世上行走，不受到任何骚扰或者暴力。我们有权享受简单，可以支付得起的避孕方式，和生殖健康服务。我们有权利为自己的身体作出决定，不受法律监管或者宗教教条束缚。我们有权尊重别人和受到别人的尊重。

There's more. When we talk about the needs of women, we have to consider the other identities we inhabit. We are not just women. We are people with different bodies, gender expressions, faiths, sexualities, class backgrounds, abilities, and so much more. We need to take into account these differences and how they affect us, as much as we account for what we have in common. Without this kind of inclusion, our feminism is nothing.

还有更多。当我们谈论到女性的需求，我们也要考虑到我们所具有的其他属性。我们不仅仅是女性，我们形体不同，性别表达不同，信念，性取向，所处社会阶层，能力等等都不同。当我们在考虑我们有哪些共同点的时候，也要考虑到这些不同之处以及这些不同之处是在如何影响我们。不把两方面都囊括进去，女权主义没有意义。

I hold these truths to be self-evident, but let me be clear: I'm a mess. I am full of contradictions. There are many ways in which I'm doing feminism wrong.

我认为这些是不容否认的事实，但还是要澄清，我自己很乱。充满了矛盾。很多时候我错误的实行了女权主义。

I have another confession. When I drive to work, I listen to thuggish rap at a very loud volume.(Laughter) Even though the lyrics are degrading to women -- these lyrics offend me to my core -- the classic Yin Yang Twins song "Salt Shaker" -- it is amazing. (Laughter) "Make it work with your wet t-shirt. Bitch, you gotta shake it 'til your camel starts to hurt!" (Laughter) Think about it. (Laughter)Poetry, right? I am utterly mortified by my music choices. (Laughter)

我要再忏悔一次。当我开车去上班时，我用很大的音量听（内容）残暴的饶舌歌。即使歌词是在贬低女性，让我深深地感到被冒犯。Ying Yang Twins有首著名的歌，”Salt Shaker“, 特别“棒”。 “利用你湿透的T恤”。“婊子，你要摇起来，直到你的下身开始疼！”  大家想想。像诗一样，是不是？我得说我需要改变在音乐上的偏好。

I firmly believe in man work, which is anything I don't want to do, including -- (Laughter) -- all domestic tasks, but also: bug killing, trash removal, lawn care and vehicle maintenance. I want no part of any of that. (Laughter) Pink is my favorite color. I enjoy fashion magazines and pretty things. I watch "The Bachelor" and romantic comedies, and I have absurd fantasies about fairy tales coming true.

我坚定地相信有的男性的工作。是我不想做的，比如所有家务，还有杀虫，扔垃圾，修剪草坪，修车。我一点都不想做这些。我最喜欢的颜色是粉色。我喜欢时尚杂志和漂亮的东西。我看”The Bachelor“(美国一档真人秀) 和浪漫爱情喜剧。我还对童话故事在现实中实现 有着荒诞的想象。

Some of my transgressions are more flagrant. If a woman wants to take her husband's name, that is her choice, and it is not my place to judge. If a woman chooses to stay home to raise her children, I embrace that choice, too. The problem is not that she makes herself economically vulnerable in that choice; the problem is that our society is set up to make women economically vulnerable when they choose. Let's deal with that.

我有些错误更让人不能忍。如果一位女性想要把姓改成她老公的，那是她的选择，我没有权利去评价。如果一位女性选择在家带孩子，我也支持她的决定。问题并不是她的决定让她在经济上处于劣势；问题是我们的社会形态 导致女性在做出选择时就会处于经济上的劣势。让我们来解决这个问题。

I reject the mainstream feminism that has historically ignored or deflected the needs of women of color, working-class women, queer women and transgender women, in favor of supporting white, middle- and upper-class straight women. Listen, if that's good feminism -- I am a very bad feminist.

我拒绝主流的女权主义，因为它一直以来忽略或者扭曲了 有色人种中的女性，工薪阶层中的女性，同性恋或者变性者中女性的需求，而只是有力的支持中上流社会里异性恋的白人女性。听着，如果那才是好的女权主义，我就是一名非常坏的女权主义者。

There is also this: As a feminist, I feel a lot of pressure. We have this tendency to put visible feminists on a pedestal. We expect them to pose perfectly. When they disappoint us, we gleefully knock them from the very pedestal we put them on. Like I said, I am a mess -- consider me knocked off that pedestal before you ever try to put me up there. 

还有，作为一名女权主义者，我感到压力很大。我们总是把女权主义者捧上神坛。我们期望他们表现完美。当他们让我们失望，我们会很高兴地把他们从神坛上踢下来。我说过，我自己很乱，所以与其把我捧上神坛，不如把我踢下来吧。

Too many women, particularly groundbreaking women and industry leaders, are afraid to be labeled as feminists. They're afraid to stand up and say, "Yes, I am a feminist," for fear of what that label means, for fear of being unable to live up to unrealistic expectations.

有太多女性，尤其是一些打破桎梏的女性以及商界领袖，都害怕被称为女权主义者。他们不敢站出来说，“没错，我是女权主义者”。他们害怕这个标签的意义，害怕做不到被加在身上的那些不现实的预期。

Take, for example, Beyoncé, or as I call her, The Goddess. (Laughter) She has emerged, in recent years, as a visible feminist. At the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards, she performed in front of the word "feminist" 10 feet high. It was a glorious spectacle to see this pop star openly embracing feminismand letting young women and men know that being a feminist is something to celebrate. As the moment faded, cultural critics began endlessly debating whether or not Beyoncé was, indeed, a feminist. They graded her feminism, instead of simply taking a grown, accomplished woman at her word. (Laughter) (Applause)

比如说，碧昂斯，我叫她“女神”。近些年她以一名女权主义者的形象出现。在2014MTV颁奖典礼上，她在10英尺的高台上，站在“女权主义者”的牌子前表演。那场景真的是无与伦比的精彩表演。这位明星公开的拥护女权主义，让年轻人们知道，成为一名女权主义者是件值得庆贺的事。当这一时刻渐渐被人们淡忘，文艺批评家们又开始无休无止的讨论碧昂斯到底是不是个女权主义者。他们给她表现出的女权主义打分，而不是简单地接受一个成熟，优秀的女性自己的说法。

We demand perfection from feminists, because we are still fighting for so much, we want so much,we need so damn much.We go far beyond reasonable, constructive criticism, to dissecting any given woman's feminism,tearing it apart until there's nothing left. We do not need to do that. Bad feminism -- or really, more inclusive feminism -- is a starting point.

我们对女权主义者力求完美，因为我们还在为了很多事情战斗，我们想要这样，我们太需要这样了。我们不再提出合理的，建设性的批评，而是自己剖析任何女性所表现出的女权主义，并彻底毁灭它。我们本不必这样做。坏的女权主义，或者说，更具包容性的女权主义，只是个开始。

But what happens next? We go from acknowledging our imperfections to accountability, or walking the walk, and being a little bit brave. If I listen to degrading music, I am creating a demand for which artists are more than happy to contribute a limitless supply. These artists are not going to change how they talk about women in their songs until we demand that change by affecting their bottom line.Certainly, it is difficult. Why must it be so catchy? 

但是接下来会发生什么？我们要承认我们的不足并为其负责，或者继续做我们承诺过的事情，但要勇敢一点。如果我听有贬低性语言的歌曲，我就为这些艺术家提供了一个需求，而他们求之不得。如果我们不要求他们改变他们的底线，这些艺术家就不会改变他们在歌里描述女性的方式。当然，（改变他们的底线）很困难。但这样做到底有什么吸引人之处呢？

It's hard to make the better choice, and it is so easy to justify a lesser one. But -- when I justify bad choices, I make it harder for women to achieve equality, the equality that we all deserve, and I need to own that.

做出一个更好的选择很难，但是证明一个选择不那么好却很容易。但是当我证明那些坏的的选择的时候，我的做法使得 女性更难获得应有的平等，我不得不承认。

I think of my nieces, ages three and four. They are gorgeous and headstrong, brilliant girls, who are a whole lot of brave. I want them to thrive in a world where they are valued for the powerful creatures they are. I think of them, and suddenly, the better choice becomes far easier to make.

我想到了我的两个侄女，一个三岁，一个四岁。她们俩特别可爱，聪明又固执。还特别的勇敢。我希望他们能在一个能让她们的优秀品质得到肯定的世界长大。我想到了她们，突然的，要做出更好的选择，变的更容易。

We can all make better choices. We can change the channel when a television show treats sexual violence against women like sport, Game of Thrones. We can change the radio station when we hear songs that treat women as nothing. We can spend our box office dollars elsewhere when movies don't treat women as anything more than decorative objects. We can stop supporting professional sports where the athletes treat their partners like punching bags. 

我们都能做出更好的选择。我们可以在电视上出现 对女性表现性暴力的节目的时候换台，比如体育节目，比如电视剧《权利的游戏》。我们可以在听见电台里播放对女性弃如敝履的歌曲时换台。我们可以选择看别的电影 如果电影不善待女性角色，而只是把她们作为点缀性角色。如果运动员们只把自己的同伴当做沙袋，我们也可以不再支持竞技运动。

In other ways, men -- and especially straight white men -- can say, "No, I will not publish with your magazine, or participate in your project, or otherwise work with you, until you include a fair number of women, both as participants and decision makers. I won't work with you until your publication, or your organization, is more inclusive of all kinds of difference."

另外，男性们，尤其是异性恋的白人男性，可以说，除非有一定数量的女性参与决策，我不会出版你的杂志，参与你的项目，或者跟你一起工作。我不会与你共事，除非你的出版物，或者你的组织里包含了所有不同的人和事物。

Those of us who are underrepresented and invited to participate in such projects, can also decline to be included until more of us are invited through the glass ceiling, and we are tokens no more.

我们当中那些被低估了 并且受邀参与这些项目的人，也可以在没有更多的人 打破常规参与进来之前，拒绝参与。

Without these efforts, without taking these stands, our accomplishments are going to mean very little.We can commit these small acts of bravery and hope that our choices trickle upward to the people in power -- editors, movie and music producers, CEOs, lawmakers -- the people who can make bigger, braver choices to create lasting, meaningful change.

如果不做出这样的努力，不去反抗（那些不平等的待遇），我们的个人成就所具有的意义将不那么重大。我们鼓起勇气做出这些看上去并不重大的举动，希望能以积水成海的力量去影响那些更有权利和地位的人，比如主编们，电影和音乐制作人们，公司CEO们，法律制定者，等等那些可以做出更大更勇敢的决定的人，由他们去创造更深远的影响。

We can also boldly claim our feminism -- good, bad, or anywhere in between. The last line of my book "Bad Feminist" says, "I would rather be a bad feminist than no feminist at all." This is true for so many reasons, but first and foremost, I say this because once upon a time, my voice was stolen from me,and feminism helped me to get my voice back.

我们也可以大胆的宣布我们的女权主义，不管是好的还是坏的，或者介于二者之间的。我的书《坏女权主义者》里最后一句话是这样的，“比起什么都不做，我宁愿做一个坏的女权主义者。” 我这样说的原因有很多，但是最重要的是，曾经一度，我无法表达自己的意见，是女权主义帮我赢回了这一权利。

There was an incident. I call it an incident so I can carry the burden of what happened. Some boys broke me, when I was so young, I did not know what boys can do to break a girl. They treated me like I was nothing. I began to believe I was nothing. They stole my voice, and in the after, I did not dare to believe that anything I might say could matter.

我曾经发生过一次意外。我把它叫做意外，让我可以感觉不那么沉重。有些男孩伤害了我。我当时很年轻，根本不知道为了伤害一个女孩，他们能做出什么样的事情。他们像对待废物一样对待我。让我开始觉得我就是个废物。他们夺走了我发表意见的权利，之后我都不敢想象，我说的话会有任何的意义。

But -- I had writing. And there, I wrote myself back together. I wrote myself toward a stronger version of myself. I read the words of women who might understand a story like mine, and women who looked like me, and understood what it was like to move through the world with brown skin. I read the words of women who showed me I was not nothing. I learned to write like them, and then I learned to write as myself. I found my voice again, and I started to believe that my voice is powerful beyond measure.

但是，我还能写作。我通过写作来找回自己。我通过写作把自己锻炼的更强大。我读了一些女性写的文章，她们可能能理解我的经历，或者跟我经历过相似的事情，所以能明白棕色皮肤的人所面对的是怎样一个世界。她们的文章让我觉得我并非一无是处。我学着像她们一样写作。然后再以自己的风格写作。我又重新找回了话语权，并且开始相信我的想法意见有着无法估量的力量。

Through writing and feminism, I also found that if I was a little bit brave, another woman might hear me and see me and recognize that none of us are the nothing the world tries to tell us we are.

通过写作和实践女权主义，我还发现了如果我能勇敢一点，其他女性就可以听到我的演讲，看到我，然后意识到，我们并不像这世界告诉我们的那样无能。

In one hand, I hold the power to accomplish anything. And in my other, I hold the humbling reality that I am just one woman.

这只手，掌握着能完成任何任务的力量。这另一只手，掌握着一个事实，我其实只是一个女人。

I am a bad feminist, I am a good woman, I am trying to become better in how I think, and what I say, and what I do, without abandoning everything that makes me human. I hope that we can all do the same. I hope that we can all be a little bit brave, when we most need such bravery. (Applause)

我是一个坏的女权主义者。我是一个好女人。在不放弃任何人类属性的前提下，我试着改进自己的思维方式，表达方式和行为方式。我希望我们都能这样。我希望当我们需要勇气的时候，我们都能勇敢一点。（掌声）

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