特朗普“麻烦”越来越大！？SNL爆笑演绎特朗普的电话特别多！（附视频&对话稿）
综合ABC等媒体当地时间30日报道，美国众议院情报委员会向特朗普私人律师朱利亚尼发传票，要求他在10月15日前提供与乌克兰调查的相关文件。朱利亚尼是特朗普“通乌门”事件的关键人物。
在白宫公布的特朗普和乌克兰总统泽连斯基的通话记录中，特朗普要求泽连斯基与朱利亚尼、司法部长巴尔一起调查拜登之子。
当地时间30日，特朗普解释与泽连斯基的通话内容，他称，“很简单！我在搜寻贪腐行为以及为什么法德和其他欧洲国家不为乌克兰多做事。为什么总是美国做这么多、为乌克兰和其他国家掏这么多钱？还有，拜登一家腐败！”
国会山报30日报道，特朗普在白宫告诉记者，目前正在试图查清泄密者身份。特朗普继续强调自己和乌克兰总统的通话非常完美，“但泄密者报告了完全不同的内容，错误地让这次通话看起来很可怕”。
泄密者的身份目前知之甚少。这份匿名举报成为了众议院民主党弹劾特朗普的核心内容。
今日美国30日报道，美国共和党参议院领袖麦康奈尔表示，如果众议院投票通过对特朗普的弹劾条款，参议院别无选择，只能对特朗普进行审判。
针对不断升级的“电话门”，SNL制作了一个6分钟超搞笑的视频，经典演绎了特朗普最近的电话为什么如此之多？
>>> get me rudy giuliani on the phone.
>> oh, hey, mr. trump.what's new?
>> what do you mean what's new, rudy?i'm being impeached.
it's the greatest presidentialharassment of all time. i would know.i'm like the president of harassment.
>> relax, mr. trump. we've got nothing to worry about. nobody's going to find out about our illegal side dealings withthe ukraine.
>> good.
>> or how we tried to cover upthose side dealings.
>> great.
>> or how we planned to cover up the cover-up.
>> rudy, where are you right now?
>> i'm on cnn right now.
let me put you on speaker.
>> rudy, get out of there.and whatever you do, stay off the phone.i've got another call. who's this?
>> it's attorney general barr.
>> i'm really starting to worry.
>> well, stay calm, mr. president.i know things look bad right now.but i got our top guy on this.
>> good.well, let's get him on the phone, too.
>> hello, oh, hey, mr. president.
>> rudy, you're not still oncnn, are you?
>> of course not.
>> good.
>> i'm on the "joe roganpodcast."
>> rudy, hang up the phone and get out of there.
>> okay.
>> bill, you know i'm going toneed somebody to take the blame for this.
>> yes.but where are you going to finda sacrificial patsy that will do anything you say?not it.
>> don't worry, i've got theperfect stooge.
>> hello?
>> big mike, how's church going? still waiting on what's his faceto come back?
>> you mean jesus, sir?
>> yeah, yeah.listen, i'm just calling you about this whole ukrainewhistle-blower thing. it's looking pretty bad for you.
>> for me?but you're the one who broke the law.
>> wait a minute.don't try to drag me into your mess.hold on, i'm getting a call fromthe boys. hello.
>> dad, it's your son.
>> and eric.
>> dad, i just can't believe thelamestream media's focused on you and not on the corruption ofjoe biden.
>> i know.by the way, did you take care of that thing in russia for me?
>> what thing in russia?
>> the treason.
>> eric!
>> hang on, boys, i'm getting avery important call from the
chairman.chairman kim.
>> wazzzup!
>> thanks for getting back tome. i need some advice.how do you handle a whistleblower?
>> oh, that's easy. you have a big ocean in your country?
>> yes.>> send whistle-blower to the bottom of there.
>> oh, right. i wish my country was as cool as your Country.hang on.i've got to take this. kanye, how have you been my man?
>> a lot better, bro, actually. you remember those pills i wassupposed to take, huh? so it turns out i'm supposed totake those every day. can you believe that?
>> that's good, that's good.
>> actually, that's the reason i'm calling you.i don't think we can be famno more, fam.
>> what?
>> give me the phone.only in america.
>> don king, don't tell me yoududes are partying without me. is rodman there and tyson too?
>> yeah. we were just having an emergency meeting of the black whack-a-doodles.and we all decided that this whole impeachment thing ishurting our brand.
>> oh, don't bail on me now.i need my urbans.kanye, just tell me you who want out of jail this time.asap rocky again?
or how about that little girlteriyaki 69?
>> look fam, we got to go.say goodbye to the douchebag.
>> yeah, man. terrence howard is on the roofwith an umbrella trying to prove that gravity don't exist.only in america.
>> this whistleblower's startingto ruin everything for me. hello?
>> what's up?
>> judge jeanine. things are not going so great.i'm really feeling down. i could really use a pep talk.
>> well, mr. president, you've come to the right place.who's my special beautiful boy?
>> i am.
>> who makes every woman's eyes pop out of her skull and goa-ooga?
>> i do.
>> damn right you do. because you've got dumps like atruck truck and thighs like what what.
>> thanks. i really needed that.this whistle-blower thing, it
just won't go away.
>> well, if you really want someone to go away, you know whoto call.
>> right.that's genius. i'll call him right now.
>> hello?
>> yes. is this ray donovan?
>> excuse me?
>> ray donovan the fixer?the guy who takes care of stuff
wink wink?
>> i told you, mr. president. ray donovan is a fictional character. i'm liev schreiber, the actor.
>> oh, of course.right. i knew that.but if you can't do it, could you connect me with john wick?
>> he's fake. he's fake too, mr. president.
>> what about liam neeson?
>> actually, liam might do it.
>> fine.that's good. i'll get him.problem solved.and live from new york it's saturday night!
Saturday Night Live returned for its 45th season by once again poking fun at the 45th president of the United States. This time, Alec Baldwin’s President Donald Trump was desperately phoning friends, foreign leaders, and celebrity allies to solicit their help in fighting a newly opened impeachment inquiry.
A week of political turmoil led to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announcing her support for an impeachment inquiry, following a whistleblower complaint that alleged Trump pressured Ukraine to investigate a potential political rival, former Vice President Joe Biden. SNL seized the opportunity provided by the situation, with Baldwin returning to headline, despite having said he planned to retire his Trump parody.
The cold open begins with Baldwin using one of Trump’s catchphrases — presidential harassment — to complain about the impeachment process.
“It’s the greatest presidential harassment of all time,” he says. “I should know. I’m like the president of harassment.”
The show was not subtle in mocking key administration figures and made fun of Trump’s personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani — portrayed by Kate McKinnon — for sharing sensitive, personal information on live television (Thursday, Giuliani read text messages from Kurt Volker, the State Department’s former special envoy for Ukraine, on Fox News). When McKinnon’s Giuliani receives a concerned call from Baldwin’s Trump, the character assures him that none of their wrongdoings will become public — while he is filming an appearance on CNN.
“Nobody’s going to find out about our illegal side dealings with the Ukraine,” McKinnon’s Giuliani says. “Or how we tried to cover up those side dealings. Or how we planned to cover up the cover-up.”
Baldwin then calls a string of his other administration members and family: Aidy Bryant’s Attorney General William Barr; Beck Bennett’s Vice President Mike Pence; and Alex Moffat and Mikey Day’s Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump. Baldwin’s Trump, however, has little success in finding a solution to his impeachment, with Barr summing up the response to the president’s entreaties: “Where are you going to find a sacrificial patsy that’ll do anything you say? Not it.”
As Trump begins to panic, Kim Jong-Un swoops in to give some advice on how to handle whistleblowers. Played by the show’s first East Asian cast member Bowen Yang, Kim tells Trump the solution is simple: “You have a big ocean in your country? Send whistleblower to the bottom of there.”
Baldwin attempts a few more unsuccessful phone calls — with Kanye West, played by Chris Redd, and Don King, played by Kenan Thompson, telling the president they’re withdrawing their support — before he hears from Cecily Strong’s Jeanine Pirro, who cheers him up by referring to him as her “special, beautiful boy” and by telling him how handsome he is.
At last out of options, the skit sees Trump deciding to call an expert. He reaches out to actor Liev Schreiber, who, playing himself, explains that the fixer he portrays on Ray Donovan is a fictional character.
To that, Baldwin simply responds: “If you can’t do it, can you connect me with John Wick?”
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