关于逆子活埋老母之事，荐读两文。
推着小车活埋自己的母亲？
这个社会怎么了？
作者/来源：黑白先生
今天，陕西一男子将79岁母亲活埋的新闻引爆网络！
详细情况是这样的：
2020年5月2日20时许，马某某在自己家中将瘫痪在床的母亲（79岁）用手推车拉走，次日凌晨2时许独自一人推着车子回到家中，家人见状向其询问母亲去向，马某某谎称送往庆阳的客车上去亲戚家了，家人隐约感觉不妙，迅速寻找未果。
这个时候，马某某偷着自己跑了。
马某某的妻子赶紧报警，5月5日上午，派出所民警将马某某找到，经对其询问，马某某供述自己将母亲用羊车车推到炼油厂后面万亩林，见四处无人，找了一个废弃墓坑倒进去埋了。
更令人惊奇的是，整整三天时间过去了，马某某可能是埋的比较松软，扒出来一看，他的母亲竟然还活着，说明这位七旬老人命不该绝啊..
小时候听过一个故事，一个人将病重的母亲放在小推车上，准备埋了她。这时，他儿子说，“爸爸，埋完奶奶后，记得把小推车拉回来。”他问，“为什么”。儿子说，“我以后也要用它把你送走。” 果然，故事都是真实事件改编的。
无论如何，我们都不能丧失人性，不能做社会的败类和人类的败渣。如果在医院，您的亲人生不如死，我们也没有理由剥夺人的生命，如果你生活的环境极度贫困，我们也没有理由侵害其他人的生命。
一句话，老人阳寿未尽，不孝子必遭天谴！
为什么这么说呢？老人由于阳寿未尽，不能转世投胎，只能很痛苦的一直作为灵魂附在子女周围，导致子女的身体、精神越来越差，子女的好运气也就会消失。
在中国古代，我还听说过“瓦罐坟”的故事。
秦朝时期，有一种抛弃活埋老人的弃老风俗，这个风俗，即是把年满60岁的父母安置在村外的预先建好的瓦罐坟中，每天送一次饭并加上一块砖，待砖把坟的窗口堵死了就算安葬了父母。
那时候医疗水平不佳资源有限才有的风俗。人家那还送口饭吃呢，而新闻里的马某某直接就活埋亲生母亲，真是畜生都不如。
这个新闻也让我明白了一个道理：
一个人老了最大的体面自己有钱，有自己的固定资产，自己才有选择权。
另外一定要切记，千万不要把自己的资产早早分给子女。指望自己的子女，自己混的好一点子女也不至于太差。
自己混的不好，子女也混得不好，在面临重大疾病各种人生选择上，子女会做对自己最有价值最有利的选择，这是人性。
亲情永远建立在互惠互利的基础上，虽然话很难听但你必须承认。有退休金有家底的老年人，老年生活会更加体面，也会更得到子女尊重。
这个新闻也让我从另一方面思考：
活埋亲妈的人虽然是极少数，但农村养老问题真的是个非常严重的社会问题。对农村的低收入群体来说，没有养老保障的老人就是“负资产”，如果儿女没什么收入来源，谁来管这些丧失了劳动能力的老人？一个国家的强大富裕不是看富人有多奢侈，高楼大厦多气派，而是要看给一无所有的穷人能否提供基本保障。
活埋八旬老母，
是因为农村道德的极度沦丧
作者：唐山水 来源：老唐有态度
活埋自己的亲生母亲，这样惨绝人寰的事情，原来只是在小说、影视剧中看到的情节，居然在现实中真实发生了。
多亏马某宽的妻子善良，孝顺。她报警后，警方经过多方寻找，终于在5月5日找到被埋的老人。
之前有媒体报道，说老人瘫痪在床，这种说法有误。老人实际上属于四级肌力。肌力分为五级，正常人为五级，完全瘫痪的人是零级，也就是说，老人的生活完全可以自理。
根据已知的信息可以看到，这个马某宽实在是太可恶了。母亲生活可以自理，家里衣食无忧，他在县城还买了房子，可见经济条件并不是特别差，却做出这样有悖人伦的事情，真是太可恶了。
难怪大家在谴责马某宽，说把他千刀万剐也不过分。
但是在我看来，事情的根因，在于农村道德的极度沦丧。
我小时候在农村出生长大，那个时候的农村，邻里之间的关系非常融洽。大家日出而作，日落而息，凿井而饮，耕田而食。我们每天迎着朝阳去上学，一路上伴着鸡犬桑麻。当时的农村，民风淳朴，不孝敬老人，更是非常丢脸的事儿，子女在村里会抬不起头来。
如今，随着城镇化的不断发展，大家的物质生活提高了，农村的破败，农村人的道德滑坡，达到了非常惊人的地步。有钱就是大爷，没钱寸步难行，在很多农村，已经成为不折不扣的人生信条。
于是，在有的夫妻之间，父母与儿女之间，都变成了赤裸裸的金钱关系，哪有亲情可言？我的发小曾经给我经过这样一个故事：几年前，他儿子结婚前几天的一个晚上，因为钱不够，他骑摩托车外出借钱，不幸遭遇车祸，腿被摔骨折了。在此期间，儿子多次去医院看他，从来没有问他一句“腿疼不疼，医生说多久能恢复”之类关心的话，都是直接问他：钱准备好了没有？
发小给我说完，不住地长叹。我也在想，这样的儿子，能指望他养老吗？
传统道德沦丧，家风传承缺失，攀比成风、赌博盛行。记得小时候就是家里再穷，长辈都会教导小辈不要偷盗、赌博、孝敬长辈等，要有敬畏之心、心存善良，要多读书，耕读传家思想还是很普遍的。
我在七八岁时，偷了邻居老大爷一副扑克牌，被父母狠狠地揍了一顿，末了被逼着把扑克牌给老大爷送回去，并且当面认错。从那以后，谁的东西再好，也不敢有贪念了。
但是现在，完全是“笑贫不笑娼”。外出靠偷盗诈骗，女孩在外面做小姐，当小三。只要在老家盖新楼房，就比考上大学的有本事，更受人尊重。读书没有用，直接导致很多农村家庭教育、家风唯金钱至上，相互攀比谁家房子高，谁家车子贵，结果就是很多人铤而走险胡作非为，没有敬畏之心，偷盗村县、诈骗村等比比皆是。
现在农村红白喜事、过年春节到处是赌博，有些打工青年春节几天可以输掉打工一年的钱，因为赌博结怨杀人，因为赌博妻离子散。可以说由于农村在改革开放的过程中很多传统的文明乡风的传承缺失是导致这一现象的重要因素，也是由于长期忽略农村文化教育的结果。
在传统观念中，我们都说农民是勤劳勇敢善良的一个弱势群体，但是如果实际接触，会发现未必是自己想像的那样。现在农村子女不孝，兄弟睨娱墙的事情真不少，尽管未必有马某宽这样极端，但很多老人的晚年生活没有保障，也是铁一般的事实。
之所以在老人身上发生这样的悲剧，还有一个原因就是老人没有收入来源。在农村，有正式工作的退休人员待遇较高，每个月领着几千元的退休工资。对于儿孙来说，这可是一大笔收入，比种庄稼强多了。因此，他们会对老人非常孝顺。
但是大部分农村老人，如果丧失了劳动能力，每个月只能领到百十块钱，别说留给子孙了，连吃药都不够。因此往往会受到各种嫌弃。
说句良心话，现在没有了劳动能力或是疾病缠身的80岁以上老人，哪个没有经历过饥饿与贫穷？哪个没有拉扯过一大帮孩子？！哪个不是含辛茹苦地养家？！哪个不是省吃俭用地供子女上学？！如今，他们老了，没有用了，再也榨不出油水了，那颗饱经沧桑的心，儿女们可以任意践踏了！是不是他们当年养育儿子的时候，没有想到自己会有老去的那一天？
曾国藩曾经有句名言：“穷则独善其身，富则达济天下”，所以曾氏一门多出人才。当我们都在指责集体道德沦丧的时候，也应该反思一下自己。如果我们每个家庭都能有自己良好的家法和家规，就不可能出现“八旬老母”被活埋的悲剧了。
一个社会的文明程度，取决于对待弱者的态度。希望政府和整个社会都来重视农村的法制建设，和弱势群体的养老问题。毕竟发生“活埋八旬老母”这样的事件，是每个国人的耻辱。
50. All you can do is to try your best. Even with those small steps, you're closer to your goal than you were yesterday. 我们能做的只是拼尽全力，即使迈出的步子再小，也比昨天要更接近自己的目标。51. A smile is the shortest distance between two people. 微笑是人与人之间最短的距离。52. Do or do not. There is no try. 要么做，要么滚！没有试试看这一说。53. Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow. 勇气就是虽感恐惧，但仍会前行。54. A man can be destroyed but not defeated. 人可以被毁灭，但不可以被打败。55. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery while on a detour. 真正快乐的人是那种在走弯路时也不忘享受风景的人。56. No dream is too big, and no dreamer is too small. 梦想再大也不嫌大，追梦的人再小也不嫌小。57. It doesn't matter how many times you fail. What matters is how many times you stand up and try again. 失败多少次不重要，重要的是你能重新站起来多少次，并且继续前行。58. Silence is the most powerful cry. 沉默是最有力的呐喊。《美丽人生》 59. A little consideration, a little thought for others makes all the difference. 一点点体贴，一点点为他人着想，会让一切都不一样。60. Stop waiting for things to happen.Go out and make them happen. 别指望事情会自然发生，行动起来，让它们变成可能！61. Don't look forward to tomorrow, don't miss yesterday, to grasp today. 不憧憬明天，不留念昨天，只把握今天。62. Now we don't call it alive. It's just not to die. 我们现在不叫活着，这只是没有死去。《疯狂原始人》 63. You can change your life if you want to. Sometimes you have to be hard on yourself, but you can change it completely. 有志者事竟成。有时虽劳其筋骨，但命运可以彻底改变。《唐顿庄园》 64. Time will bring a surprise, if you believe. 时间会带来惊喜，如果你相信的话。《浮生物语》 65. What others think is not important . How you feel about yourself is all that matters. 别人怎么想并不重要，你怎么看自己才是关键。66. Don't cry because it is over,smile because it happened. 不要因为结束而哭泣，微笑吧，因为你曾经拥有。67. Tomorrow is never clear. Our time is here. 明天是未知的，我们还是享受此刻吧！《摇滚夏令营》 68. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all. 生活要么大胆尝试，要么什么都不是。69. Pursue excellence and success will follow. 追求卓越，成功自然来。《三傻大闹宝莱坞》 70. Climb mountains not so the world can see you, but so you can see the world. 爬上山顶并不是为了让全世界看到你，而是让你看到整个世界。71. Every step towards your dream today is a step away from your regret tomorrow. 今日为梦想所付出的每一份努力都会减少明日的一份后悔。72. It's never too late to be what you might have been. 勇敢做自己，永远都不迟。（乔治·艾略特） 73. It's time to start living the life you've imagined. 是时候开始过自己想要的生活了！95. How can men succumb to force? 男人怎么能屈服于“武力”之下？《海贼王》 96. Life is like live TV show. There is no rehearsal. 人生没有彩排，只有现场直播。97. Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman. 穿着破旧，人们记住衣服；穿着无瑕，人们则记住衣服里的女人。(Coco Chanel) 98. Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies. 希望是一件好事，也许是人间至善，而美好的事永不消逝。《肖申克的救赎》 99. There are so many beautiful reasons to be happy. 有太多太多美好的理由让你笑对生活。100. Where the more different you are, the better. 你们之间越是不同，越好。(Glee) 101. I'm only brave when I have to be. Being brave doesn't mean you go looking for trouble. 我只在必要时才勇敢，勇敢并不代表你要到处闯祸。《狮子王》 102. Behind every successful man there's a lot of unsuccessful years. 每个牛B的成功者都经历过苦B的岁月。(鲍博.布朗) 103. If you want something done, do it yourself. 靠谁都不如靠自己。《第五元素》 104. Life is a wonderful journey. Make it your journey and not someone else's. 生命是一段精彩旅程，要活的有自己的样子，而不是别人的影子。105. No matter how many mistakes you make or how slowly you progress, you are already ahead of those who never tried. 无论你犯了多少错，或者进步得有多慢，你都走在了那些不曾尝试的人的前面。106. Some things are so important that they force us to overcome our fears. 总有些更重要的事情，赋予我们打败恐惧的勇气。107. Say to yourself: "No matter how many obstacles I encounter in life, I will do all that I can to complete the whole course." 请对自己说：无论生活之路上会遇到多少障碍，我会竭尽所能地跑完这一程。108. No cross, no crown. 不经历风雨，怎么见彩虹。109. Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value. 与其努力成功，不如努力成为有价值的人。(爱因斯坦) 110. Remember when life's path is steep to keep your mind even. 记住：当人生很苦逼的时候，你要保持淡定。111. If you're brave enough to say GOODBYE, life will reward you with a new HELLO. 只要你勇敢地说出再见，生活一定会给你一个新的开始。112. Sometimes the right path is not the easiest one. 对的那条路，往往不是最好走的。113. Just trust yourself, then you will know how to live. 只要相信自己，你就会懂得如何去生活。114. In life it's not where you go. It's who you travel with. 生命中，重要的不是你去哪里，而是与谁同行。115. Life is like a rainbow. You don't always know what's on the other side, but you know it's there. 生活像一道彩虹，你不知道另一端通向哪里，但你会知道，它总是在那里。116. When the world says,"Give up!"Hope whispers,"Try it one more time." 当全世界都在说“放弃”的时候，希望却在耳边轻轻地说：“再试一次吧”！117. I don't care about other questions and I just try to be myself. 我不在乎别人的质疑，我只会做好自己。118. Attempt doesn't necessarily bring success, but giving up definitely leads to failure. 努力不一定成功，但放弃一定失败！119. The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today. 对明天最好的准备就是今天做到最好。120. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. 你已经一无所有，没有什么道理不顺心而为。(乔布斯) 121. Life is a journey, one that is much better traveled with a companion by our side. 人生是一场旅程，我们最好结伴同行。122. Sometimes you have to fall before you can fly. 有时候，你得先跌下去，才能飞起来。123. If you are able to appreciate beauty in the ordinary, your life will be more vibrant. 如果你擅于欣赏平凡中的美好，你的生活会更加多姿多彩。124. Be who you are, and never ever apologize for that! 坚持做自己，并永远不要为此而后悔！125. Consider the bad times as down payment for the good times. Hang in there. 把苦日子当做好日子的首付，坚持就是胜利！126. Do not pray for easy lives, pray to be stronger. 与其祈求生活平淡点，还不如祈求自己强大点。127. Everybody can fly without wings when they hold on to their dreams. 坚持自己的梦想，即使没有翅膀也能飞翔。128. There is no such thing as a great talent without great will power. 没有伟大的意志力，便没有雄才大略。129. You can't change your situation. The only thing that you can change is how you choose to deal with it. 境遇难以改变，你能改变的唯有面对它时的态度。130. Whatever is worth doing at all is worth doing well. 凡是值得做的事，就值得做好。131. Perfection is not just about control.It's also about letting go. 完美不仅在于控制，也在于释放。《黑天鹅》 132. Dream is what makes you happy, even when you are just trying. 梦想就是一种让你感到坚持就是幸福的东西。133. Never frown,because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. 别愁眉不展，因为你不知道谁会爱上你的笑容。134. It's easy once you know how. 一旦你明白，就会很简单。135. In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different. 要做到不可替代，就要与众不同。136. I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate. 宁愿失败地做你爱做的事情，也不要成功地做你恨做的事情。(George Burns) 137. Don't hide. Run! You'll make it to tomorrow. 别躲避，奔跑吧，你就会找到明天。138. Life comes with many challenges.The ones that should not scare us are the ones we can take on and take control of. 生活充满了挑战，唯有勇敢面对并自我掌控，我们才能克服恐惧。(安吉丽娜·朱莉) 139. Life doesn't just happen to you; you receive everything in your life based on what you've given. 一切发生在你身上的都不是碰巧。你获得什么，在于你付出了什么。140.You are more beautiful than you think. 你，要比你想象的更美丽。141. Throughout life's complications, you should maintain such a sense of elegance. 不管生活有多不容易，你都要守住自己的那一份优雅。142. When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on so long in the first place. 每当你想要放弃的时候，就想想是为了什么才一路坚持到现在。143. Enjoy your youth.You'll never be younger than you are at this very moment. 好好享受青春，你再也不会有哪个时刻会比此时更年轻了。144. You'd better bring, cause I'll bring every I've got it. 你最好全神贯注，因为我定会全力以赴！145. Take time to enjoy the simple things in life. 慢慢享受生活中的简单。146. As long as you are still alive, you will definitely encounter the good things in life. 只要活着就一定会遇上好事。147. Hold on, it gets better than you know. 挺住，事情会比你想像中要好！148. If you are fine,the sun will always shine. 你若安好，便是晴天。149. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 磨难会让你更强大。150. Every life deserves our respect. 每一个生命都应该被尊重。151. The best feeling in the world is when you know your heart is smiling. 世间最美好的感受，就是发现自己的心在笑。152. Don't ever underestimate the heart of a champion. 永远不要低估一颗冠军的心。(Rudy Tomjanovich) 153. There is nothing permanent except change. 唯一不变的是变化。154. The difference between successful persons and others is that they really act. 成功者和其他人最大的区别就是，他们真正动手去做了。155. Don't follow the crowd, let the crowd follow you. 不要随波逐流，要引领潮流。(Margaret Thatcher) 156. People pay in advance for a coffee meant for someone who cannot afford a warm beverage. 人们提前买咖啡，让付不起的人享受温暖。157. No one is born a genius.Just keep on doing what you like and that itself is a talent. 哪有什么天才！坚持做你喜欢的事情，这本身就是一种天赋。(大野智) 158. The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page. 世界是一本书，不旅行的人只读了其中一页。159. You can create something more glorious than the championship. 你可以创造比冠军更荣耀的事。160. You never get a second chance to make a first impression. 永远没有第二次机会，给人留下第一印象。161. You can always be a worse version of "him", or better version of yourself. 你不是要做一个单纯优秀的人，而是要做一个不可替代的人。162. Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful day of your life. 让每一天都有机会成为你人生中最美好的一天。163. Honesty is the best policy. 做人以诚信为本。164. To a crazy ship all winds are contrary. 对于一只漫无目标的船而言，任何方向的风都是逆风。165. The outer world you see is a reflection of your inner self. 你看到什么样的世界，你就拥有什么样的内心。166. Strike while the iron is hot. 趁热打铁。167. Knowing what you cannot do is far more important than knowing what you are capable of. 知道自己不能做什么远比知道自己能做什么重要。168. People cry, not because they're weak. It's because they've been strong for too long. 哭泣，不代表脆弱，只因坚强了太久。169. Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. 别留念昨天了，把握好今天吧。(Will Rogers) 170. If you are not brave enough, no one will back you up. 你不勇敢，没人替你坚强。171. If you don't build your dream, someone will hire you to build theirs. 如果你没有梦想，那么你只能为别人的梦想打工。172. Beauty is all around, if you just open your heart to see. 只要你给自己机会，你会发现你的世界可以很美丽。173. The difference in winning and losing is most often...not quitting. 赢与输的差别通常是--不放弃。(华特·迪士尼) 174. I am ordinary yet unique. 我很平凡，但我独一无二。175. I like people who make me laugh in spite of myself. 我喜欢那些让我笑起来的人，就算是我不想笑的时候。176. Image a new story for your life and start living it. 为你的生命想一个全新剧本，并去倾情出演吧！177. I'd rather be a happy fool than a sad sage. 做个悲伤的智者，不如做个开心的傻子。178. The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. 未来属于那些相信梦想之美的人。(埃莉诺·罗斯福) 179. Even if you get no applause, you should accept a curtain call gracefully and appreciate your own efforts. 即使没有人为你鼓掌，也要优雅的谢幕，感谢自己的认真付出。180. Don't let dream just be your dream. 别让梦想只停留在梦里。181. A day without laughter is a day wasted. 没有笑声的一天是浪费了的一天。(卓别林) 182. Travel and see the world; afterwards, you will be able to put your concerns in perspective. 去旅行吧，见的世面多了，你会发现原来在意的那些结根本算不了什么。183. The key to acquiring proficiency in any task is repetition. 任何事情成功关键都是熟能生巧。《生活大爆炸》 184. You can be happy no matter what. 开心一点吧，管它会怎样。185. A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow. 今天的好计划胜过明天的完美计划。186. Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! 一切皆有可能！“不可能”的意思是：“不，可能。”(奥黛丽·赫本) 187. Life isn't fair, but no matter your circumstances, you have to give it your all. 生活是不公平的，不管你的境遇如何，你只能全力以赴。188. No matter how hard it is, just keep going because you only fail when you give up. 无论多么艰难，都要继续前进，因为只有你放弃的那一刻，你才输了。189. It requires hard work to give off an appearance of effortlessness. 你必须十分努力，才能看起来毫不费力。190. Life is like riding a bicycle.To keep your balance,you must keep moving. 人生就像骑单车，只有不断前进，才能保持平衡。(爱因斯坦) 191. Be thankful for what you have.You'll end up having more. 拥有一颗感恩的心，最终你会得到更多。192. Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. 美是一种内心的感觉，并反映在你的眼睛里。(索菲亚·罗兰) 193. Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows. 朋友的作用，就是让你快乐加倍，痛苦减半。194. When you long for something sincerely, the whole world will help you. 当你真心渴望某样东西时，整个宇宙都会来帮忙。 When Paul Jobs was mustered out of the Coast Guard after World War II, he made a wager with his crewmates. They had arrived in San Francisco, where their ship was decommissioned, and Paul bet that he would find himself a wife within two weeks. He was a taut, tattooed engine mechanic, six feet tall, with a passing resemblance to James Dean. But it wasn’t his looks that got him a date with Clara Hagopian, a sweet-humored daughter of Armenian immigrants. It was the fact that he and his friends had a car, unlike the group she had originally planned to go out with that evening. Ten days later, in March 1946, Paul got engaged to Clara and won his wager. It would turn out to be a happy marriage, one that lasted until death parted them more than forty years later. Paul Reinhold Jobs had been raised on a dairy farm in Germantown, Wisconsin. Even though his father was an alcoholic and sometimes abusive, Paul ended up with a gentle and calm disposition under his leathery exterior. After dropping out of high school, he wandered through the Midwest picking up work as a mechanic until, at age nineteen, he joined the Coast Guard, even though he didn’t know how to swim. He was deployed on the USS General M. C. Meigs and spent much of the war ferrying troops to Italy for General Patton. His talent as a machinist and fireman earned him commendations, but he occasionally found himself in minor trouble and never rose above the rank of seaman. Clara was born in New Jersey, where her parents had landed after fleeing the Turks in Armenia, and they moved to the Mission District of San Francisco when she was a child. She had a secret that she rarely mentioned to anyone: She had been married before, but her husband had been killed in the war. So when she met Paul Jobs on that first date, she was primed to start a new life. Like many who lived through the war, they had experienced enough excitement that, when it was over, they desired simply to settle down, raise a family, and lead a less eventful life. They had little money, so they moved to Wisconsin and lived with Paul’s parents for a few years, then headed for Indiana, where he got a job as a machinist for International Harvester. His passion was tinkering with old cars, and he made money in his spare time buying, restoring, and selling them. Eventually he quit his day job to become a full-time used car salesman. Clara, however, loved San Francisco, and in 1952 she convinced her husband to move back there. They got an apartment in the Sunset District facing the Pacific, just south of Golden Gate Park, and he took a job working for a finance company as a “repo man,” picking the locks of cars whose owners hadn’t paid their loans and repossessing them. He also bought, repaired, and sold some of the cars, making a decent enough living in the process. There was, however, something missing in their lives. They wanted children, but Clara had suffered an ectopic pregnancy, in which the fertilized egg was implanted in a fallopian tube rather than the uterus, and she had been unable to have any. So by 1955, after nine years of marriage, they were looking to adopt a child. Like Paul Jobs, Joanne Schieble was from a rural Wisconsin family of German heritage. Her father, Arthur Schieble, had immigrated to the outskirts of Green Bay, where he and his wife owned a mink farm and dabbled successfully in various other businesses, including real estate and photoengraving. He was very strict, especially regarding his daughter’s relationships, and he had strongly disapproved of her first love, an artist who was not a Catholic. Thus it was no surprise that he threatened to cut Joanne off completely when, as a graduate student at the University of Wisconsin, she fell in love with Abdulfattah “John” Jandali, a Muslim teaching assistant from Syria. Jandali was the youngest of nine children in a prominent Syrian family. His father owned oil refineries and multiple other businesses, with large holdings in Damascus and Homs, and at one point pretty much controlled the price of wheat in the region. His mother, he later said, was a “traditional Muslim woman” who was a “conservative, obedient housewife.” Like the Schieble family, the Jandalis put a premium on education. Abdulfattah was sent to a Jesuit boarding school, even though he was Muslim, and he got an undergraduate degree at the American University in Beirut before entering the University of Wisconsin to pursue a doctoral degree in political science. In the summer of 1954, Joanne went with Abdulfattah to Syria. They spent two months in Homs, where she learned from his family to cook Syrian dishes. When they returned to Wisconsin she discovered that she was pregnant. They were both twenty-three, but they decided not to get married. Her father was dying at the time, and he had threatened to disown her if she wed Abdulfattah. Nor was abortion an easy option in a small Catholic community. So in early 1955, Joanne traveled to San Francisco, where she was taken into the care of a kindly doctor who sheltered unwed mothers, delivered their babies, and quietly arranged closed adoptions. Joanne had one requirement: Her child must be adopted by college graduates. So the doctor arranged for the baby to be placed with a lawyer and his wife. But when a boy was born—on February 24, 1955—the designated couple decided that they wanted a girl and backed out. Thus it was that the boy became the son not of a lawyer but of a high school dropout with a passion for mechanics and his salt-of-the-earth wife who was working as a bookkeeper. Paul and Clara named their new baby Steven Paul Jobs. When Joanne found out that her baby had been placed with a couple who had not even graduated from high school, she refused to sign the adoption papers. The standoff lasted weeks, even after the baby had settled into the Jobs household. Eventually Joanne relented, with the stipulation that the couple promise—indeed sign a pledge—to fund a savings account to pay for the boy’s college education. There was another reason that Joanne was balky about signing the adoption papers. Her father was about to die, and she planned to marry Jandali soon after. She held out hope, she would later来源：小兵说天下