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What are the top 10 signs that you've been too long in China

2017-08-03 CET Talk CETtrip北京 CETtrip北京

What are the top 10 telltale signs that you've been too long in China?

CET Talk

First Top 10

I am Polish American mix born in Russia living in China. I'm obsessed with learning about other countries and cultures and the languages that will help me understand them. 

I have lived in China for 17 years. Here is my list!

  1. You say “en” in response when listening to people talk.

  2. You shove on the bus and subway.

  3. You prefer squat toilets over real toilets in public, and bring tissue with you to the bathroom every time.

  4. You use words like “mafan”, “fangbian” when speaking in your native language, because sometimes they just seem to do the job .

  5. You carry umbrellas on sunny days and get overly concerned about maintaining white skin.

  6. You drink the warm water. No complaints.

  7. You pay attention to “hot” and “cold” foods and are careful not to “上火”

  8. You stopped turning off the comments when watching movies or shows on bilibili or acfun and read them for the lols.

  9. You laugh at the Chinese memes on your WeChat moments.

  10. Writing this list was hard because none of these things seem unusual for you anymore.

By Alysa Kees, Lived in China for 17 years. 

BA in Chinese Language and Culture

Second Top 10

I think most Chinese people are eager to share their culture with others. Showing greater degrees of assimilation while living in China will definitely score you points. 

I have lived in China for 7 years Here is my list!

  • You start thinking to yourself and dreaming in Chinese.

  • You start to think some western food is too salty or too sweet.

  • You start parsing your words and really consider the minutiae in Chinese culture and communication.

  • You don’t care about “being like a native” or “being Chinese” anymore. You live where you’re comfortable — eat what you want — and might even start to make more friends from your home country.

  1. You make preparations for 回南天 and buy the moisture absorbing pellets.

  2. You have a tea set and a collection of assorted tea leaves.

  3. You jaywalk, cram yourself into elevators and onto trains instead of taking offense or being self-righteous.

  4. You get a feeling of comfort when returning to your city/home in China.

  5. You become obsessed with constantly looking at or playing on your phone.

  6. You grow so accustomed and comfortable with life here that you fall victim to simple scams you would have caught a few years earlier.

By William Regan, 

living in China for seven years

Third  Top 10

I am Amirlan Akhmetov from Kazakh. Usually Kazakh ethnic people speak both Kazakh and Russian languages but new generation can speak English as well, not that fluent but at least can handle basic communication in own field. 

I have lived in China for 3 years Here is my list!

1. When you drink a yogurt with a drinking straw instead of using a spoon

2. When you almost do not consume milk food

3. When you use WeChat more frequently rather than other Social Apps

4. When you spend 70$ per year for VPN and get used to it already

5. When you use a toilet paper in the café instead of tissues and it's totally fine for you

6. When you understood that you are incompetent at singing the song with Chinese, cause usually Chinese people very good at it

7. When you do not care about traffic light, cross the road if there are no cars nearby

8. When you do not care anymore that Chinese girls do not shave their pubic hair

9. When you often reply with Memes or stickers in WeChat

10. When you get sick, first what you should do is 多喝热水(drink more hot water)

By Amirlan Akhmetov 

B.A Product Design & Engineering

Fourth Top 10

I am Dawei Chen, Studied at University of Southern California, and now live in China, Here is my list:

  1. You got used to drink warm water at restaurants instead of iced water.

  2. You Jay walk.

  3. You keep very minimal mustache because pretty much no other guy here likes keeping a mustache; you start avoiding tanning if possible becuase all the girls like to be light-colored.

  4. You gives no frack to the police.

  5. You learn to yell at the line-cutters, telling them to frack off where in reality you are cutting a line yourself.

  6. You love getting drunk at a table by a lamb kabob joint by the streets.

  7. You honk at pedestrians for walking too slow.

  8. You have become used to smoke cigs indoors.

  9. You have to get stupid drunk at Karaoke at least once a month.

  10. (One Year Mark) You have lost desires for French, Italian and for the matter, pretty much all other types of cuisine.

@Dawei Chen

Fifth Top 10

Let me try my version, I lived in Xiamen and Beijing on my tenth year in China. Being a Malaysian Chinese shouldn't have too much different than westerners, but still:

  1. Mobile phone solves many conveniences on daily life, so losing your phone is worse than wallet or keys.

  2. Can't live without online shopping and fast delivery and abundance of cheap priced products.

  3. yellow light means go faster. Also to pedestrian and non-automobile, a traffic light is a suggestion.

  4. Read the AQI before going out and wear a mask.

  5. Travel abroad for vacation than domestic because it is cheaper comparatively, and also shopping.

  6. Curse on almost every foreign country you visited for having less developed roads, amenities, inconvenience.

  7. Chew on duck neck, rabbit head, hotpot intestines and other exotic stuff and liked them.

  8. Got bored with Facebook and liked Wechat and Weibo (I still enjoy YouTube though).

  9. Download movies, TV, music and books for free (oops that slips out)

  10. wechat GIF emoji war with friends

By Keone Ewe, studied at UTM

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China is, more than anywhere else, a place that SURPRISES you, and the more open-minded you are the more amazed you will be living there.

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