巴夏：父母惹我生气，我该怎么办？
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日安，巴夏！ good day Bashar
你也日安 and to you good day
我叫玛利亚 my name is Maria
恭敬不如从命 if you insist
首先我只想表达我的感激之情 and I just want to express my gratitude first
因为去年五月我也被诊断出乳腺癌 because last May I was also diagnosed with cancer breast cancer
好吧 alright
你的书《寻求真相》在这段困难时期帮了我很大的忙 and your book quest for truth helped me tremendously during that difficult time
我也想向乔表达我的感激之情 and I also want to express my gratitude towards Jo
因为他问了一个类似的问题，我听得很认真 because he asked a similar question to which I listened very carefully
好的，我们谢谢你创造了同步性来帮助到你！ alright we thank you for creating the synchronicity that assisted you
我还想分享下，在你说到癌症的时候， 我头脑里出现的第一件事就是癌症=答案 and I also wanted to share that how you
mentioned cancer to me the first thing that came up was cancer answer
恩 yes
不知何故，他们的第一感觉是，虽然这是一个非常悲伤的时刻 and somehow the first feeling that they got even though it's a it's a very sad time
我的灵魂有点高兴 somehow my soul was happy
虽然我还不想去那上面 even though I don't want to go up there yet
恩，你不会提前去的 well you won't go before your time
所以我从你的书中学习了很多 and so I have learned from your book yes
我看待这个病的态度，已经是非常积极的了 and that attitude that I have approached this disease which has been very positive
我的生活变得更好了 and my life has changed for the better
我遇到过的那些人 the people that I have met
但是我有一些特殊的难题 however I have some particular challenges
我的饮食已经有了很大的改善等等 and I have made a lot of improvements with my diet and so forth
我意识到了我必须在情绪上保持十分镇定 but I realized that emotionally I have to remain very calm
是的，这一切都始于信念系统的能量过滤然后创造情感、思想和行为 well yes and again this all starts with the energy of the belief system that filters through and creates the emotions and thoughts and behaviors
所以，这永远是明智的选择首先去平衡你自己的信念体统， 来协助你在生理上的体验 so it's always wise to balance yourself out in the belief systems first to aid and assist the experience you are having physiologically
恩，因为这个传讯会跟镜子有关 yes and since this presentation has to do with mirroring
是啊 yes
我想要问你，我和我的父母之间有个特殊的难题， 我有非常了不起的父母 I wanted to to ask you I have a particular challenge with my parents which I have great amazing parents
但是他们反射和打击我，因为他们挑剔和批判我的长相 but they mirror and strike within me - because they're judgmental and critical towards my looks
这让我发狂 and that throws me into a fit
但你为什么要相信他们所说的 but why do you believe what they're saying
我不知道，我与他们有非常强的连接 I don't know I am very much energetically connected to them
我认为是非常强烈的，它要不也许是好的，要不也许是坏的 and I believe like very strongly either if it's good or if it's bad
但这对你来说不是一个机会吗？ 让你自己决定什么是真的而什么不是真的 but isn't this an opportunity for you to decide for yourself what's true and what's not
他们不是给你一个机会来决定他们所说的是否与你有关吗？ aren't they giving you an opportunity to decide whether what they're saying has anything to do with you
或者这是否更多的是跟他们有关呢？ or whether it has more to do with them
他们向你吐槽了很多他们的恐惧 they are expressing a lot of their fears to you
为什么你要选择相信他们？ why do you choose to buy into them
这与你跟他们强力的连接着没有关系，当然你是的 it doesn't matter that you're energetically connected of course you are
但这不是意味着你非得相信同样的恐惧，他们带到他们生活中的恐惧 but that doesn't mean you have to buy into the same fears that they have bought into in their lives
他们在给你一个机会来做出不同的选择 they are giving you an opportunity to make a different choice
为什么你不作出选择呢？如果你更愿意那样的话 why aren't you making it if you would prefer to
我不知道 I don't know
喔，你知道的，你可以从中脱身的 oh yes you do you can get away with that
你不能逃脱“我不知道的” you cannot get away with saying I don't know
你的确知道 you do know
你只是没有去看 you're just not looking
所以去看吧 so look
这才是问题的关键 that's the whole point
他们是在给你一个机会，以便你更深入地看向自己的内在， 并决定他们对你所说的东西是否对你是真实的 they're giving you an opportunity to look more deeply within yourself and decide whether or not what they're saying to you is true for you
或者你是否要信以为真 or whether you're going to buy into the idea that it is true
我觉得我比他们有更多的觉醒 I feel a lot more awakened than them and
但是明显地，在这个特殊的情况中，你是说你没有那么的觉醒 but obviously in this particular case you're saying that you're not
在他们的身边，我就完全失去了自我觉知了 I lose my consciousness totally around them
他们惹恼我很多次了 they push my so many buttons
这是一个选择，你是在激怒你自己 that's a choice you're pushing your own buttons
你同意他们，那就是激怒你自己 you are agreeing with them and that's pushing your own button
所以你被他们以一个非常有爱心的方式，给予了你一个机会 so you are being given an opportunity in a very loving way by them
无论他们是否知道 whether they know it or not
来决定不需要被惹毛 to decide not to have a button to be pushed
你被给予一个机会去改变到目前为止所有你被教育的模式 you are being given an opportunity to change all of the training that you've been given up to this point
这样你就不必相信他们在激怒你 so that you don't have to buy into the ideas that they're pushing
因为你是在激怒你自己身上 because you're pushing them on yourself
他们什么都不能说服你，如果你不同意被他们说服 they can't convince you of anything that you don't agree to be convinced by
不管他们是谁 no matter who they are
所以你是在同意他们 so you're agreeing with them
你不必同意他们的 and you don't have to
是啊，同意了他们，在他们指指点点我的信念的时候我非常生气 yeah agreeing and I'm very angry when they voice my own beliefs
然而你是生气了，不是吗？ but you're angry yes
但是其他人说我的时候，我不介意 but when other people say it I don't care
只是他们这样说会让我非常生气 just because they say it makes me very angry
不，它不会的 no it doesn't
难道你不明白吗？他们不能让你做任何事，你是对自己这样做 don't you understand they can't make you do anything you're doing it to yourself
因为你是在同意他们所说的 because you're agreeing with what they say
就像它是真的一样 as if it's true
我怎样才能停止生气？ how can I stop
你要明白这不是真的 you have to understand it's not true
是什么让你觉得他们说的是真的？ what makes you think that what they're saying is true
因为我觉得我的生活圈子是一个非常批判的世界 because I think it myself it's a very judgmental world
你是在自我批判 you are judging yourself then
是，我是批判自己 yes I am
为什么你要这样做？你能从中得到什么呢？它又如何服务于你呢？ why are you doing that what do you get out of doing that how does it serve you
我是被这样编程了 I was programmed this way
但是如果你知道了，你就不会再被编程了，不是吗？ but if you know that you're no longer programmed are you
记住，如果你被编程了，如果你有某个行为模式或者习惯 remember that if you're programmed if you have a pattern and a habit
那是你在做你自己也不知道在干嘛的事情 that's something that you do that you don't know you're doing
这是习惯的定义 that's the definition of a habit
这就是编程的定义 that's the definition of a program
但是一旦你认识到这有个编程， 一旦你认识到这有个习惯 but once you understand there's a program once you understand there's a habit
一旦你认识到这有个模式 once you understand there's a pattern
你就不会再有它了，它便消失了 you don't have it anymore it's gone
如果你还继续这样做 if you keep doing it
这不是因为你被编程了，这是因为你选择继续这样做 it's not because you're programmed it's because you're choosing to keep doing it
不要那样选择了，你不必这样 stop choosing that you don't have to
没有什么比这个更神秘的了 it's no more mysterious than that
你不必继续那样做，你不必继续批判你自己 you don't have to keep doing that you don't have to keep judging yourself
你不必继续相信你必须这样做 you don't have to keep believing that you have to do that
你不必继续相信你被编程了 you don't have to keep believing that you're programmed
既然你已知道它是一个编程，那么它便不再是了 now that you know it was a program it no longer is
你不必继续相信你还被编程 you don't have to keep believing that you're still programmed
他们说他们是为了我好，然后我就选择接受了 and they say that they mean well and I choose to accept
我理解，不过你要明白的是，他们有他们自己的信念系统， 没有必要非得与“你选择相信什么对自己才是真实的”产生任何关系 I understand but again you have to understand that they have their own belief system and it doesn't have to have anything to do with what you choose to believe is true about yourself
如果你理解他们也许是好意的 if you understand that they may mean well
然后以对你有用的方式来利用他们的好意 then use their well-meaning in the way that works for you
只是因为他们说他们是为了你好 just because they say they mean well
这并不意味着你必须去做他们告诉你你应当这样做的事情 doesn't mean you have to do things the way that they're telling you that you have to do things
或者你必须这样考虑自己 or the way you have to think about yourself
他们可以是好意的，你也没有必要搭理他们说的话 they can mean well and you don't have to pay attention to what they're saying
如果你真的想要孝敬你的父母 if you want to really honor your parents
做真正的你自己，而不是你认为你需要成为那样的人， 也不是他们认为你需要成为那样的人 be who you really are not who you think you need to be not who they think you need to be
因为你所做的一切是成为一个不是你自己的某个人 because all you're doing is being someone you're not
如果你成为了别人 if you're being someone you're not
这并不真正地孝敬它们，不管他们怎么想 that doesn't really honor them no matter what they choose to think
恩，所发生的情况是，我开始哭得像个孩子， 然后他们说我是假装的，在我哭的时候他们不想和我说话 well what happens is I just start crying like a child and they say that I'm faking it and they don't want to talk to me when I'm crying so
也许最好你暂时不要跟他们说话 perhaps it would be better if you didn't talk to them for a while
你认为怎么样 what do you think about that
这发生了，我觉得被孤立了，每次都持续一年的时间 it happened but I feel so isolated it happened for a year at a time
你明白吗？你描述的所有情感来自于你相信对自己为真的事情 do you understand that all the feelings you're describing come from things you believe to be true about yourself
而且这些感觉不会存在，直到你相信它们是真实的 and that those feelings don't exist until you believe them to be true
是啊 yeah
那就不要用这个感觉作为借口来继续感受他们 then don't use the feelings as an excuse to keep feeling them
因为这就是你所做的一切，你只是不断地为“你有这些感觉”辩护 because that's all you're doing is you're constantly justifying the idea that you have these feelings
但你没有做任何事情来改变产生这类感觉的信念 but you're not doing anything about changing the belief that generates the feelings
所以不要再为这感觉辩护了 so stop justifying the feelings
不要再为引起它们的信念辩护了 and justifying the beliefs that create them
如果你不喜欢有这些感觉 if you don't prefer to have those feelings
那么改变生成它们的信念 change the beliefs that are generating them
你没有必要相信这些东西 you don't have to believe these things
你没有必要去感受这些东西 you don't have to feel these things
如果你感受到它们并且你认为你应该体会到它们， 那这是你的选择 if you feel them and you believe that you should feel them that's your choice
你不会停止这么做，直到有一天你受够它了 you won't stop doing it until you're sick and tired of it
我猜你还没受够 I guess you're not sick and tired enough
是啊 yeah
所以你的父母会一直逼迫你，推动你 so your parents will keep pushing you pushing you and pushing you
因为你邀请他们这样做， 为了让他们推动你变成你真正更喜欢成为的人 because you are inviting them to do so in order to have them push you into who you actually prefer to be
当你厌倦了处在疲惫与厌倦的状态， 那么你就不会再处在疲惫与厌倦的状态了 when you are sick and tired of being sick and tired you'll stop being sick and tired
但显然你还没到那地步 but you're not there yet obviously
是啊 yeah
所以这取决于你 so it's up to you
我会继续尝试的 I'll keep trying
不，只管去做 no just do it
如果你想，你可以继续尝试 you can keep trying if you want
但要明白的是，如果你继续不断尝试，那就是你所做的一切了 but understand if you keep trying that's all you're doing
你在尝试，你没有做它，你没有改变它 you're trying you're not doing it you're not changing it
你在尝试去改变它 you are trying to change it
试图做出某些改变就是它本身的状态，就是它本身的体验 trying to change something is its own state is its own experience
在那个状态下唯一发生的事情就是你不断地尝试 and the only thing that happens in that state is that you keep trying
你一改变想法，那么你便会真正地做事情 one you change your mind then you actually do something
现在你在做尝试，这就是它所拥有的事情 right now you are doing the trying that's its own thing
这就是它特有的体验，这没关系 that's its own experience that's fine
但要明白你在干嘛，要清楚你在干嘛 but understand what you're doing be clear about what you're doing
当你说：我要试试，这就是所有你将会体验到的→“尝试” when you say I'm going to try that's all you'll experience is the trying
你将永远不会体验到成为 you will never experience the being
直到你老老实实选择做你更想要成为的人 until you actually
choose to be who you prefer to be
你只会体验试着成为那个 you will only experience trying to be that
这就是它所有的现实 that's its own reality
而不是你更想要的那一个 not the one that you prefer
你跟得上吗？ you follow
是啊 yeah
这有帮助吗？ - 恩 is this helping yeah