ISSUE 6 | An ER Nurse and His Boyfriend

Editor's Note

During the COVID-19 outbreak, dominant media coverage often features scenes of medical workers parting with their families. However, there is little representation of families outside of the “normative” conception. In this issue, we present you with the story of a gay couple, Xiaoyang (30) and Lin Feng (38), both fighting at the front line of the COVID-19 epidemic. They have been together for six and a half years and lived together for four. As an emergency room nurse, Xiaoyang volunteered to join a medical support team to aid a hospital in Wuhan. In their home community in Beijing, Lin Feng serves as a policeman who patrols crowded public spaces to ensure safety.

Based on interviews with the couple, the story was originally published on February 4, 2020 by 亲友会PFLAG China (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays; Beijing Branch), an NGO dedicated to supporting and promoting the visibility of the LGBTQ+ community in China. Although Xiaoyang’s parents do not totally deny his years-long relationship with Lin Feng, they haven’t been very supportive of it, either. Xiaoyang chose to publish their story on the PFLAG platform because he wanted “parents with queer children to see that we can also be socially committed and responsible.” 

The endnote of the original Chinese version is worth contemplating: “The photos provided by the interviewees have been deleted and their names anonymized to protect their career prospects.”

Anybody can love; and hopefully someday we can all love without fear. 

 unCoVer 

▼

Gay Couple on the Front Lines: 

An ER Nurse and His Boyfriend

Author: 路LRH

Translator: Freya Yao

Originally published on 4 February, 2020 by: 

亲友会PFLAG北京分会

1

Looking at the cuddling couples while he and his partner could only see each other from afar, Xiaoyang “was a little jealous.”

“Take care of Lele and Keke.” Immediately after boarding, Xiaoyang texted his boyfriend Lin Feng on WeChat (a Chinese social media app). He was worried about their two pets, but even more so about his boyfriend. 

Four replies from Feng shot into the chat box:

“Take care of yourself.”

“Are you boarding?”

“No need to worry about those little two.”

“Remember to call me as soon as you land.” 

As a member of the volunteer medical support team, Xiaoyang boarded the flight to Wuhan at 2 pm on February 2. Earlier that morning, Xiaoyang received the WeChat message from his supervisor at the hospital that asked him to pack up and be on call. Now, he was finally heading to the epicenter of the novel coronavirus outbreak.

Seventeen years ago Xiaoyang’s parents took part in combating SARS. Xiaoyang felt prepared when he submitted his written request to go to the front line of the “battle” against the novel coronavirus, but he still got a bit nervous the moment he received the notice. He was the most junior member in the second batch of medical support teams. Confronted with the climbing numbers of infections and deaths in this formidable epidemic, he said, “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid,” but, “(w)ith the white scrubs on, saving lives becomes my call of duty.”

Left: 2 March, 2020 - A medical worker from Fujian Province signing a written request to join a medical support team for Wuhan. Image courtesy of Shen Cengceng (Source 1).

Right: 9 February, 2020 - Three hundred medical support workers from Henan Province taking an oath to combat the coronavirus before leaving for Hubei Province. Image courtesy of Wang Zheng (Source 2). 

Xiaoyang has had experience supporting the fight against the H1N1 and avian influenza epidemics. He also took part in the medical relief efforts in the aftermath of the 2008 Wenchuan earthquake (Endnote 1). At the emergency room, Xiaoyang's daily patients are in critical condition or have urgent needs. Considered the “physically strong” ones in the department, male nurses like Xiaoyang typically do more work. Always in green scrubs (Endnote 2) and a pair of white cloth shoes, Xiaoyang also wears a nurse cap with cartoon figures. When Lin Feng goes to pick up Xiaoyang from work, he always looks for that colorful cap in the hustle and bustle of doctors and nurses busy in green - the color of life.

The morning before Xiaoyang’s flight, Lin Feng went shopping with him. “We bought a lot. He (Feng) got everything he could think of, whether it would actually come in handy or not.” Later, Lin Feng accompanied Xiaoyang to the hospital, watched him take an oath to fight the virus with his colleagues, and took pictures of him. Right before the departure, Lin Feng put an amulet his mother prepared for Xiaoyang in his backpack. To Xiaoyang, that was a heartwarming gesture.

11 February, 2020, Guiyang, Guizhou Province - Medical support workers hugging their loved ones goodbye before departure to E’zhou, Hubei. Image courtesy of Tao Liang (Source 3).

At the airport, a friend of Xiaoyang’s came with supplies to see him and his team off. She had promised not to cry, but still ended up bursting into tears while embracing Xiaoyang in her arms. “It’s alright! I will be back safe and sound. Don’t you worry,” Xiaoyang said.

Also at the airport were the husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends of many medical staff on Xiaoyang’s team. Some were hugging, others holding hands. But Lin Feng could only take pictures of Xiaoyang away from the crowd. Looking at the cuddling couples while he and his partner could only see each other from afar, Xiaoyang “was a little jealous.”  Immensely worried, Lin Feng initially did not want Xiaoyang to go, but bearing the “big picture” in mind, he decided to be supportive.

Xiaoyang said, “Beijing, Beijing, I am leaving. I really hope that when I come back, we will be able to take off our masks and see each other’s smiles!” 

The 135 passengers on this special flight were all doctors and nurses going to Wuhan for medical support. And they were about to arrive at the most severely impacted place, with a life-and-death battle in front of them.

At 4:34 pm, Xiaoyang and his colleagues arrived at the Wuhan Tianhe Airport.

11 February, 2020, Yichang, Hubei - Medical support teams (158 workers) from Fujian Province upon arrival (Source 4).

2

Now that Xiaoyang was really there, some of the things his boyfriend packed proved to be useless.

The day after their arrival, Xiaoyang was told by fellow doctors that the situation was still critical -- many patients were waiting for a hospital bed in anguish. Such severity was disconcerting. Even though Xiaoyang had signed himself up for this volunteer mission without second thought, he couldn’t help but feel scared and uneasy: “Besides respiratory (droplets) transmission, recent findings revealed that the novel coronavirus could be transmissible along fecal-oral route. The virus may mutate fast and it is not known yet if there are new channels of infection to be discovered.” Their medical support mission was originally scheduled to last one week, but judging from Wuhan’s serious situation, Xiaoyang figured that he might have to stay until things are under control. 

25 January, 2020, Wuhan, Hubei - ER workers covering themselves with isolation suits on top of their protective suits (Source 5).

Medical supplies in affected areas were tight. In anticipation of this battle, Xiaoyang’s hospital donated all of its protective medical suits to Wuhan’s hospital. Having been told that they would receive theirs in Wuhan, no one brought any with them. They learned today, however, that the local hospital had insufficient protective equipment. Besides, no daily necessities were available and everyone had to fend for themselves. Now that Xiaoyang was really there, some of the things his boyfriend packed proved to be useless. 

The hospital Xiaoyang was assigned to had opened a few dozen beds exclusively for COVID-19 patients in critical condition. Upon arrival, Xiaoyang went shopping at a supermarket for necessities before devoting himself to work that night. Besides a washbasin and a toothbrush, Xiaoyang also bought quite a lot of adult diapers. Due to the severe shortage of protective suits, they had to wear each set for as long as it allowed -- working for at least five to six hours straight. They would have to take off the suit to use the bathroom. Before putting on a new one, they would have to shower, which takes at least half an hour. Therefore, to save time and avoid unnecessary consumption of protective suits, medical workers often wear diapers to take care of their urine.  

31 January, 2020, Wuhan, Hubei - Nurses from Beijing putting on protective suits before entering the ward. Image courtesy of Beijing Tiantan Hospital (Source 6). 

3

[Lin Feng] would stretch his palm to feel the other half of the warm bed, not being able to fall asleep for long.

Neither of them enjoyed this Lunar New Year. Xiaoyang was working backup shifts at the hospital throughout the holiday, while Lin Feng, a policeman, was also on the front line. These days he often needs to work outdoors, patrolling very crowded places like train stations to secure people’s safety.  

Lin Feng said that he has long been accustomed to Xiaoyang’s working pattern. Once on a chilly winter evening, Lin Feng walked Xiaoyang to work, hand in hand. They were only one street away from the hospital, but suddenly there was considerable noise ahead -- someone had just passed out and was now unconscious with no breath or heartbeat. Xiaoyang turned to Lin Feng and shouted, “Call 120 (the Chinese emergency number)!” Then he bent down and immediately started chest compressions. During the process, he did not forget to turn around and ask the crowd, “Any family?”

One, two, three, four… Xiaoyang knelt in the snow and pressed hard on the patient’s chest, steam rising from his mouth and nose. An ambulance came and he went with it. The vehicle sped away and Lin Feng rushed home, looking for dry clothes to replace Xiaoyang’s pants, the knees of which had gotten wet from the snow.

28 February, 2020, Huanglong, Hubei - Psychological support service team helping frontline policemen release physical and psychological stress (Source 7).

Oftentimes a sudden phone call in the early morning would wake Xiaoyang up when he was still all sleepy. “Where? What’s the patient’s condition?  Alright, I’ll be on my way!!” He would start dressing the moment he hung up the phone. Getting out of bed gently, Xiaoyang would swiftly put on his clothes, clean up, quietly close the door and leave. 

On top of understanding the commitments of his partner’s nursing job, Lin Feng also feels a deep sense of apology. As a policeman, he is also on call to work anytime. Many times, summoned by emergency calls, Lin Feng has to rush to the site and leave behind the equally exhausted Xiaoyang.  

25 January, 2020, Jinan Province - Traffic police guarding highway checkpoint (Source 8).

In their small world of two, there are always urgent situations like this and that: one guarding patients, and the other guarding the public. Disturbances are frequent in their already limited shared time -- how to balance, to give and take, and to have it all? Understanding that they are trusted with lives, mutual support is what they both choose. 

In those early mornings, Lin Feng no longer pretended that he had not been awoken. He would stretch his palm to feel the other half of the warm bed, not being able to fall asleep for long. He could only pray in his heart: 

“Fighting on the edges of life and death, I hope that you can always be at your best to handle even the worst-case scenarios. My dear babe, I wish the patients health and safety, and for you to come back early.”

Endnote 1: The 2008 Wenchuan earthquake (汶川大地震 Wèn chuān dà dì zhèn) occurred in Sichuan, China on May 12, 2008. Measuring at 8.0 Ms (7.9 Mw), it caused over 69,000 deaths and left around 4.8 - 11 million people homeless. It is the 18th deadliest earthquake of all time (Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_Sichuan_earthquake). 

Endnote 2: This endnote is intended to explain an apparent discrepancy between the couple's references to "white scrubs'' and "green scrubs." The phrase "white scrubs" is a symbolic reference to medical workers in general, who are often praised as 白衣天使 (bái yī tiān shǐ, “angels in white scrubs”), while the "green scrubs" are Xiaoyang's actual daily work clothing as an ER nurse.

References:

Source 1: http://fjnews.fjsen.com/2020-03/02/content_30198728_2.htm

Source 2：http://www.zhengzhou.gov.cn/html/www/news7/20200210/2353065.html

Source 3: https://club.6parkbbs.com/military/index.php

app=forum&act=threadview&tid=15564411

Source 4: http://headline.fjtv.net/folder476/2020-02-11/2171439.html

Source 5: https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzI2ODExNzg5OQ==&mid=2653626436&idx=1&sn=0e24d6c2be9849f2b04c6ef07314a1d3&chksm=f12bf2a0c65c7bb6b853f150d20ffbc401e05045118cdbf4c6a465dc0ef7cef2d61ce993dc96&scene=21#wechat_redirect. 

Source 6: http://www.bjd.com.cn/a/202001/31/WS5e3437f2e4b0e6e58393db12.html

Source 7: https://www.twoeggz.com/info/320105.html

Source 8: https://www.wanxiangzixun.net/detail/1496915.html?src=souhu

Based on interviews with the couple, the story was originally published on February 4, 2020 by 亲友会PFLAG China (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays; Beijing Branch), an NGO dedicated to supporting and promoting the visibility of the LGBTQ+ community in China. The original content has been edited for clarity.

如果您想阅读源中文内容，请点击文末“阅读原文”

Proofreader: Carly, Huiyin

Editor: Huiyin, Joyce 

Typesetting: Jiara

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