TED英语演讲视频：你是会用英文把天聊死的人吗？（附视频+演讲稿）
TED是Technology, Entertainment, Design(科技、娱乐、设计)的缩写，这个会议的宗旨是"用思想的力量来改变世界"。TED演讲的特点是毫无繁杂冗长的专业讲座，观点响亮，开门见山，种类繁多，看法新颖。而且还是非常好的英语口语听力练习材料，建议坚持学习。
TED英语演讲视频：你是会用英文把天聊死的人吗？
视频介绍这是TED最受欢迎的演讲之一。我们的语言可能是世界上最有力的声音，可以引起战争，也可以说出动听的话，类似“我爱你”。但绝大多数人会经历过，你所说的，并不是别人想听的。为什么？我们能怎么办？演讲者为我们整理出了语言的“七宗罪”，还有对付它们的方法。
如果你希望成为一个说话有人聆听的人，说话有影响力的人，那么可以听听他在TED的演讲。
https://v.qq.com/txp/iframe/player.html?vid=h0131oi8s33&width=500&height=375&auto=0
演讲稿
你是会用英文把天聊死的人吗？
人类的声音是我们都弹奏的乐器，可能是世界上最有力量的声音。但是可能很多人都有过这样的经验，当他们在说的时候，人们并不在听。为什么呢？怎样才能让我们的演讲，或者更大一点说我们的谈话，更有力量，从而让世界发生某种改变呢？
首先，我为大家总结了说话的七宗罪，我们在日常的谈话过程中非常容易犯的坏习惯。
第一宗罪：流言蜚语（gossip）。在背后说某些人的坏话，这不是一个好习惯，我们都很明白，那个说闲话的人五分钟之后，就会在别人面前说我的坏话。
第二宗罪：评判（judging）。你知道如果站在你对面的人在评判你，并且认为你不够格的话，你就很难再跟对方把对话继续下去。
第三宗罪：消极（negativity）。我妈妈在她生命的最后几年变得非常非常消极，很难让人听她说话。我记得有一天，我对她说，“今天是十月一号”，她回答说，“我知道，这不可怕吗？”当一个人消极到这种程度，你就很难再听下去。
第四宗罪：抱怨（complaining）。另外一种形式的消极就是抱怨，这是英国的全国性运动，我们抱怨天气，抱怨体育，抱怨政治，几乎抱怨每一件事情。但是抱怨是多悲催的一件事情，它不会在这个世界上传播太阳和光明。
第五宗罪：借口（excuses）。我们都遇上过这种人，或者曾经做过那样的人。有的人是指责爱好者，他们怪罪任何人，而不是对自己的行为负责任。这又是让人难以聆听的一种。
第六宗罪：撒谎（lying）。浮夸（embroidery），吹牛（exaggeration）。夸大慢慢就变成了说谎，彻头彻尾的说谎，我们就不想听这种我们知道会说谎的人说话。
第七宗罪：固执己见（dogmatism）。把事实和自己的意见混淆。你知道，有人用他们自己的意见来强迫你，我们就很难再听下去。
我认为以上这些是我们需要避免的。
有没有正面的谈话方式呢？如果我们想让我们的言语有力，并且让世界产生变化，我想建议四个强有力谈话的基础。幸运的是，这四个基础连起来是一个单词——HAIL。我认为如果我们坚持这四件事情，我们的言辞会更被接受。
第一，诚实：清晰、直接（Honesty：Be clear and straight）。
第二，真诚：做你自己，坚持真实的自己（Authenticity: be yourself）。
第三，守信：知行合一（Integrity:be your word.）。成为别人能信任的人。
第四，爱：愿所有人更好（Love: wish themwell）。
说真话，直截了当并且清楚明白。但是绝对的诚实未必是我们真正想要的。比如，天，你今天早上看起来真难看。嗯，这可能是不必要的。诚实是很重要的。当然，适当地带着爱和善意。同时，当你对人带着爱、带着善意，你就很难同时评判他们。我不觉得有人能一边爱着某人一遍评判他。
除此之外，上面提到的是关于你所说的内容，就好像老歌一样，你所说的很重要，同时你的表达方式也很重要。你有一个很神奇的工具盒，里面有难以置信的工具，然而这个工具盒只有不多的人打开过。我想在这里跟你们探查一下，你也许想拿来试一下，这些将增加你说话的力量。
1. 音域（Register）。假声大部分时候可能是没用的，但在真声和假声这两者之间会有一种是有用的。在座的可能有语音教练，我不会去到非常技术的层面。我只想简单地说，你能够定位你发音的位置。比如我把声音提到鼻子这里，你是可以听出来不不同的。如果我把声音降到嗓子这里，这是我们大部分人大多数时候所做的。但是如果你想要有分量，你需要降到胸腔。我们给声音低沉的政治家投票，那是真的。因为我们把深沉和权力、权威联系在一起。
2. 音色（Trimble），就是你的声音给你感觉如何。研究显示，我们喜欢那种丰厚、平滑、温暖的声音，就像热巧克力一样（玩笑）。当然，如果你没有那样的声音，也不是世界末日。因为你是可以得到训练的，去找一个教练吧。利用呼吸、姿势、还有锻炼，来改善你的音色。
3. 韵律（prosody）。我喜欢韵律。那是歌唱，我们用来传送意味，在谈话中是意思的根基。那种说话一个声调的人，如果他们没有一点韵律，很难让人听得进去。那就是“单调”（一个调子）这个词的来源。或者说枯燥无味，一成不变。还有的人用重复性的韵律。每个句子的结尾都语调上扬，即便是说陈述句的时候都像是说疑问句。如果你一遍又一遍的重复这个的话，它会限制你用韵律来交流的能力。我认为这是一件憾事。让我们努力打破那个习惯。
4. 语速（Pace）。我可以非常非常兴奋地、飞快地说着什么，或者我能慢下来强调。还有我们的老朋友——沉默。在讲话中，有一点儿沉默一点问题也没有。我们不需要用“嗯”和“啊”来填充。沉默本身可以是非常有力量的。
5. 音调（Pitch）。音调常常跟语速一起来指示兴奋度，但你也能仅仅用音调就显示出来。
6. 音量（Volume）。我能用非常大的声音表示极端的兴奋；或者，我能用很轻的声音让你认真地注意。有人全程一直都在说话，别那样做，那叫做“公放音乐”。把你的声音不假思索和草率地强加给别人。不好。
当然，这些工具真正发挥作用的地方，是当你有什么很重要的事情要做的时候，这可能是像我这样站在演讲台上，做一个演讲。可能是求婚，要求加薪，或者婚礼上的讲话。不管是什么，如果它非常重要，你应该看看这个工具盒，以及将要工作运行的发动机。没有预热的发动机不会好好工作。预热你自己的声音。放松嘴唇，放松舌头，让声音能从嗓子到胸腔到更深的位置走一下。
我们现在经常处在什么位置上呢？我们的谈话或者演讲也不是那么有力量，环境还是一个吵闹和喧哗的环境里面，所以人们也听不进去。如果我们的谈话能够强有力，并且在一个适宜的环境中，让人们能够专注听，这个世界会是怎么样呢？或者说的更广泛一些，如果我们有意识地创造声音，并且有意识地针对要传递的声音和目的设计环境，这个世界会什么样子呢？那会是一个听起来非常美丽的世界。而“理解”将成为常态。你说的话会被听进去，被理解。
We are losing our listening. We spend roughly 60 percent of our communication time listening, but we're not very good at it. We retain just 25 percent of what we hear. Now -- not you, not this talk, but that is generally true.
Let's define listening as making meaning from sound. It's a mental process, and it's a process of extraction.
We use some pretty cool techniques to do this. One of them is pattern recognition. (Crowd noises) So in a cocktail party like this, if I say, "David, Sara, pay attention" -- some of you just sat up. We recognize patterns to distinguish noise from signal, and especially our name. Differencing is another technique we use. If I left this pink noise on for more than a couple of minutes, (Pink noise) you would literally cease to hear it. We listen to differences; we discount sounds that remain the same.
And then there is a whole range of filters. These filters take us from all sound down to what we pay attention to. Most people are entirely unconscious of these filters. But they actually create our reality in a way, because they tell us what we're paying attention to right now. I'll give you one example of that. Intention is very important in sound, in listening. When I married my wife, I promised her I would listen to her every day as if for the first time. Now that's something I fall short of on a daily basis.
But it's a great intention to have in a relationship.
But that's not all. Sound places us in space and in time. If you close your eyes right now in this room,you're aware of the size of the room from the reverberation and the bouncing of the sound off the surfaces; you're aware of how many people are around you, because of the micro-noises you're receiving. And sound places us in time as well, because sound always has time embedded in it. In fact, I would suggest that our listening is the main way that we experience the flow of time from past to future. So, "Sonority is time and meaning" -- a great quote.
I said at the beginning, we're losing our listening. Why did I say that? Well, there are a lot of reasons for this. First of all, we invented ways of recording -- first writing, then audio recording and now video recording as well. The premium on accurate and careful listening has simply disappeared. Secondly, the world is now so noisy, (Noise) with this cacophony going on visually and auditorily, it's just hard to listen; it's tiring to listen. Many people take refuge in headphones, but they turn big, public spaces like this, shared soundscapes, into millions of tiny, little personal sound bubbles. In this scenario, nobody's listening to anybody.
We're becoming impatient. We don't want oratory anymore; we want sound bites. And the art of conversation is being replaced -- dangerously, I think -- by personal broadcasting. I don't know how much listening there is in this conversation, which is sadly very common, especially in the UK. We're becoming desensitized. Our media have to scream at us with these kinds of headlines in order to get our attention. And that means it's harder for us to pay attention to the quiet, the subtle, the understated.
This is a serious problem that we're losing our listening. This is not trivial, because listening is our access to understanding. Conscious listening always creates understanding, and only without conscious listening can these things happen. A world where we don't listen to each other at all is a very scary place indeed. So I'd like to share with you five simple exercises, tools you can take away with you, to improve your own conscious listening. Would you like that?
Audience: Yes!
Good. The first one is silence. Just three minutes a day of silence is a wonderful exercise to reset your ears and to recalibrate, so that you can hear the quiet again. If you can't get absolute silence, go for quiet, that's absolutely fine.
Second, I call this "the mixer." (Noise) So even if you're in a noisy environment like this -- and we all spend a lot of time in places like this -- listen in the coffee bar to how many channels of sound can I hear? How many individual channels in that mix am I listening to? You can do it in a beautiful place as well, like in a lake. How many birds am I hearing? Where are they? Where are those ripples? It's a great exercise for improving the quality of your listening.
Third, this exercise I call "savoring," and this is a beautiful exercise. It's about enjoying mundane sounds. This, for example, is my tumble dryer.
It's a waltz -- one, two, three; one, two, three; one, two, three. I love it! Or just try this one on for size.
Wow! So, mundane sounds can be really interesting -- if you pay attention. I call that the "hidden choir" -- it's around us all the time.
The next exercise is probably the most important of all of these, if you just take one thing away. This is listening positions -- the idea that you can move your listening position to what's appropriate to what you're listening to. This is playing with those filters. Remember I gave you those filters? It's starting to play with them as levers, to get conscious about them and to move to different places. These are just some of the listening positions, or scales of listening positions, that you can use. There are many.Have fun with that. It's very exciting.
And finally, an acronym. You can use this in listening, in communication. If you're in any one of those roles -- and I think that probably is everybody who's listening to this talk -- the acronym is RASA,which is the Sanskrit word for "juice" or "essence." And RASA stands for "Receive," which means pay attention to the person; "Appreciate," making little noises like "hmm," "oh," "OK"; "Summarize" -- the word "so" is very important in communication; and "Ask," ask questions afterwards.
Now sound is my passion, it's my life. I wrote a whole book about it. So I live to listen. That's too much to ask for most people. But I believe that every human being needs to listen consciously in order to live fully -- connected in space and in time to the physical world around us, connected in understanding to each other, not to mention spiritually connected, because every spiritual path I know of has listening and contemplation at its heart.
That's why we need to teach listening in our schools as a skill. Why is it not taught? It's crazy. And if we can teach listening in our schools, we can take our listening off that slippery slope to that dangerous, scary world that I talked about, and move it to a place where everybody is consciously listening all the time, or at least capable of doing it.
Now, I don't know how to do that, but this is TED, and I think the TED community is capable of anything. So I invite you to connect with me, connect with each other, take this mission out. And let's get listening taught in schools, and transform the world in one generation to a conscious, listening world -- a world of connection, a world of understanding and a world of peace.
Thank you for listening to me today.
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