母胎solo？奔三？艾玛·沃特森告诉你什么是“self-partnered”

还记得2018年《奇遇人生》播出后， #刘雯真实#登上了微博热搜，成了当晚最热门的话题。除了独立坚强的性格让大家评价“真实”，刘雯在节目里还展现出了不为人知的一面。“母胎solo？”刘雯落泪了……在节目的淘金任务结束后，刘雯和几位同行者一起篝火夜话，玩起了“真心话大冒险”的游戏。
当被问到情感问题时，刘雯的回答是“我没有男朋友，我从来没谈过恋爱。”“I don’t have to answer this, because I don’t have a boyfriend. I’ve never been dating with somebody.”
“我的话，我总是想到工作。我爱我的工作，我的工作就是我的男朋友。”“For me, I always concentrate on my work. I love my job, I think my job is my boyfriend.”刘雯说，她想起工作来都没什么不快乐的回忆，工作就可以让自己足够开心了。“I don't think my job and life is really hard. Like I said, I always think my life is very happy. I always remember the happy things.”这时，在一旁的导演问她：“你是选择性记忆吧？”(“So you have a selective memory?”)或许这句话戳中了刘雯，她想了想说“是”，然后戴上帽子，默默用手抹掉眼泪。画风忽然有些让人心疼……之后那晚与阿雅聊天时，刘雯仿佛终于卸下铠甲，说到了自己的孤独。她感慨道，“风景也好或者是地点也好，最重要的是你跟谁去。因为我觉得无论那里再好，如果你只有一个人的话，如果没有人跟你分享的话，就像今天晚上一样，还是应该会很寂寞吧。”这件事也让刘雯再次登上了热搜。很多网友都惊讶，“没想到表姐31岁了还没有谈过恋爱”。 网友还对“单身”展开了热烈探讨，大家的观点也是各异。有人表示，“母胎solo”其实也挺好的。遇到对的人前，先遇到最好的自己。有人说，是大表姐太优秀了，所以才单身。不过，也有网友表示，看了这期节目，才发现自己跟刘雯一样，虽然嘴上说着“一个人生活也很好”，但其实，“没有陪伴的人，总是会在想要分享的时候，感到寂寞”……
“Single”？艾玛说，我这叫“self-partnered”无独有偶，说起来，最近另一位同样优秀的女神——艾玛·沃特森也谈论到了自己的情感状态。她在最近接受时尚杂志《Vogue》采访时，少见地提及了自己的情感生活，并表示，因为名气，自己很难遇见那个“对的人”。Emma Watson has opened up about her dating life - and that she struggles to meet potential suitors because of her fame.她还谈到，自己不是个会用约会软件的人，但大学里的好友都很操心她的感情生活，会为她介绍对象。Talking to British Vogue, The Bling Ring actress admitted that dating apps aren't an option for her and that she relies on being set up.在采访中，艾玛表示自己现在虽然单身，但十分享受单身生活。她还“发明”了一个新词形容自己单身的状态——“self-partnered”（和自己交往）。《华盛顿邮报》：艾玛·沃特森说自己是“和自己交往”（self-partnered）——“单身”（single）的最新定义。“我之前从来都不相信‘我是个快乐的单身贵族’这种套话……在很长时间里我都是这么认为的，但我如今过着快乐的单身生活。我称这种状态为‘和自己交往’。”“I never believed the whole 'I'm happy single' spiel . . . It took me a long time, but I'm very happy [being single]. I call it being self-partnered.”
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Emma Watson, originally of Harry Potter fame, spoke to journalist and transgender activist Paris Lees for British Vogue about the pressures of starring in the franchise, her fears on turning 30, and her activism for the magazine’s December 2019 edition. The edition will feature Emma Watson on its cover.August 2020 will mark 20 years since Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson and Rupert Grint were cast as the core trio of characters in the Harry Potter film series. They went on to star in eight movies, taking them on a journey lasting over a decade, ending with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 2 in July 2011.Speaking to Paris Lees for British Vogue, Watson opened up on her experience since Harry Potter, saying she decided to go to therapy to sort through her thoughts and feelings of guilt about starring as Hermione Granger in the franchise:“I’ve sat in therapy and felt really guilty about it. I’m like, why me? Somebody else would have enjoyed and wanted this aspect of it more than I did. And I’ve struggled a lot with the guilt around that. I’m like, I should be enjoying this a lot more, I should be more excited and I’m actually really struggling.”It’s refreshing to see somebody of Watson’s fame and history given the opportunity to be candid about her experience of the pressures of being in a role with such high expectations from the age of eleven. Whilst the world saw her as Hermione Granger for over a decade, Watson said remaining rooted in her own identity helped her eventually “find peace:”“Part of what’s helped me find peace is there were moments when it got so big where I almost had vertigo and felt it got so big that I felt l disconnected, and part of the peace within myself is remembering my identity.“I am someone’s daughter. I am my mother’s daughter, I am my father’s daughter, I am a sister. I belong to a family. I come from a place, I have roots. There’s a whole big existence and identity that I have that’s really important and weighted and solid, that has nothing to do with any of that.”Since Harry Potter, Daniel Radcliffe has starred in projects on stage and screen, from Equus on the West End and Broadway and Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead at The Old Vic, to 2012 movie The Woman In Black, and lately TV series Miracle Workers, on which he served as executive producer on several episodes.Rupert Grint appeared in 2017 TV series Sick Note, served as producer and star in ongoing TV series, Snatch, and will star in Servant, which he discussed on a panel at New York Comic Con 2019.Emma Watson has had arguably the most diverse and impressive career since ending Harry Potter, seeing her go from starring in the 2012 movie adaptation of The Perks of Being a Wallflower, to bringing to life a new imagining of Disney’s Belle in the live-action remake of Beauty and the Beast in 2017. She will also star as Margaret “Meg” March in Greta Gerwig’s adaptation of Little Women this Christmas, calling the character a feminist for her decisiveness:“Her choice is that she wants to be a full-time mother and wife. To Jo [Saoirse Ronan], being married is really some sort of prison sentence. But Meg says, ‘You know, I love him [John Brooke, who is played by James Norton] and I’m really happy and this is what I want. And just because my dreams are different from yours, it doesn’t mean they’re unimportant.”Outside of her acting career since Harry Potter, Emma Watson has given her voice and platform to women’s rights, LGBT+ rights, and sustainability campaigns. She serves as UN Women Goodwill Ambassador, advocating the HeForShe campaign to end gender inequality. Watson kicked off the campaign at a special event at theUN Headquarters in 2014 with a rousing, bold speech on being a feminist and ending sexual harassment, closing with a memorable call to action: “Ask yourself–if not me, who? If not now, when?”She has since served on global summit panels for years, and and earlier this year sat down with Nobel Peace Prize winner Dr. Denis Mukwege in London for a sombre conversation organised by New York Times about gender-based violence, and Mukwege’s work as a human rights activist and doctor working to end the use of rape as a weapon of war.Watson also contributed to the original TimesUp campaign and #MeToo fund to support victims of sexual harassment after Harvey Weinstein was exposed by several women in the movie industry for subjecting them to sexual harassment and assault. She also set up a hotline for victims of sexual harassment in the workplace.Discussing the importance of sustainability in fashion with Vogue, and its connections to human rights campaigns, Watson was clear on the need for considerations of environmental impact when it comes to fashion shoots. She worked with Vogue to source ethical looks for her December 2019 issue cover photoshoot:“We’re often asked not what we are wearing but ‘who,’” Watson said when she announced her role as an official Good On You supporter earlier this year. “It’s as if the ideas behind the clothes–the label, the designer, the collection–have more meaning than the garment itself. There’s a bigger story to be told about the conditions in which our clothes are made, the resources that have been used and the impact they’ve had on communities.”Telling Lees about the perceived struggles of turning 30, and her newfound happiness in being single (which she calls being self-partnered in an effort to reclaim the happier parts of being single), she said:“I was like, ‘Why does everyone make such a big fuss about turning 30? This is not a big deal…’” she shares. “Cut to 29, and I’m like, ‘Oh my God, I feel so stressed and anxious. And I realise it’s because there is suddenly this bloody influx of subliminal messaging around. If you have not built a home, if you do not have a husband, if you do not have a baby, and you are turning 30, and you’re not in some incredibly secure, stable place in your career, or you’re still figuring things out… There’s just this incredible amount of anxiety.”这个新词在推上引起了不少共鸣。有粉丝发推“我喜欢这个‘和自己交往’的概念。”
这也让一些网友想到了此前流行网络的一句话“I'm not single. I'm solo.”“Solo”这个单词原本一般指的是音乐中的独唱、独奏。比如一段吉他solo，即吉他独奏。《华盛顿邮报》写道，他们在2015年造了个新词“solo-ish”。而“solo-ish”大概就是说：“我的生活是我自己的，但我也跟其他人分享——我的家人、朋友、同事。有时会有那个特殊的人，但不一定一直有。”（英文里“-ish”在作形容词、名词后缀时，意为“表示“如……的、似……的、有……的性质的”。）In 2015, we coined a new word over here at The Post: solo-ish. We viewed it as a way of saying: My life is my own, but I share it with others, too — family, friends, co-workers. Sometimes there’s a special someone, but not always.不过，虽然艾玛说“享受单身”，但在采访中，明年4月就要迎来30岁生日的她，提到自己也有“奔三”的焦虑和困惑。“我意识到，因为周围突然涌入了这些潜意识的信息，如果你没有成家，如果你没有老公，如果你没有孩子，而你30岁了，你的职业生涯也不够稳固安全，你还在规划一切……这会带来大量的焦虑。”“I realize it's because there is suddenly this bloody influx of subliminal messaging around. If you have not built a home, if you do not have a husband, if you do not have a baby, and you are turning 30, and you're not in some incredibly secure, stable place in your career, or you're still figuring things out . . . there's just this incredible amount of anxiety.”但对于自我身份的归属感和家人的支持，让她找到了内心的平静。“我属于一个家庭，我来自一个地方，我有家可归。”“I belong to a family. I come from a place, I have roots.”人类的孤独是相通的，却又并不尽相同。现实总有各种原因，也许是时间，也许是地点，也许是工作，也许是种种机缘巧合，让很多人更多的时候是独自一人。那么，在没有遇到你之前，就先好好做自己吧~▼往期精彩回顾▼艾玛沃特森联合国经典演讲《HE FOR SHE》，英音之典范！
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