火爆全网的“PUA”到底什么意思？
北大女学生包丽自杀的事儿，相信大家都已经知道了。一位北大法学院大三的女生，为了一个渣男（也是北大学生）竟服药自杀，白白送上自己的性命，太不值了！这是包丽自杀前与男友牟林翰的最后聊天记录：
在微信对话截图中，我们注意到，她把男友牟林翰的微信名改为“主人”，而牟林翰则称包丽为“妈妈”。在这样双重的角色定位中，包丽一方面对牟林翰言听计从（主仆关系），一方面又对他产生保护欲（母子关系）。可以说，一个女生牢牢地被牟林翰玩弄于股掌之间。
上面截图中的一句话透露出包丽的心声，也是她对于这对畸形恋爱的总结：“遇到了熠熠闪光的你而我却是一块垃圾。”
任何一个精神尚且独立的女生，看到这样的话，肯定要分手，但包丽似乎被牟林翰牢牢地掌握，被一步步推入深渊。
“精神控制”是 PUA 界的一个术语，包丽事件，也在全社会面前彻底揭开了 PUA 的丑恶嘴脸。
那么究竟什么是 PUA？PUA 是一个英文缩写，全称为 Pick-Up Artist。PUA 的惯用套路有三： 1. 用朋友圈把自己包装成高富帅。 2. 用“反撇”获得同情心。 3. 快速推进关系。
"女生的蓝颜知已"英国恋爱专家Matthew Hussey详尽翻译直男癌语录，手把手教你如何对付PUA，破解渣男每一步骚操作... 每一句都如此真实精准，一击即中！果然是灵魂翻译家！
在之前，这位英国恋爱专家曾在一个视频里面是说过另外一个话题：恋爱中的女生是否该主动？是该选择维持高冷形象，还是该直接向男生表达心意？相信这是困扰无数女孩子的问题。英国的恋爱专家Matthew Hussey从男生的角度说：女生要更主动些，如果你只是坐等男人来找你，那你等来的多半是渣男……为什么呢？来听听Matthew Hussey分析男生的心理活动。
https://v.qq.com/txp/iframe/player.html?width=500&height=375&auto=0&vid=k064293vcb5
女孩如何暗示男孩你喜欢他？
You're probably thinking that ignoring his text messages for hours at a time is the way to go. But guys don't think the same way that we do. If you wait before answering him, he's going to think you don't like him. He won't realize that it's all a big strategy and that you're ignoring him on purpose.
你可能觉得，应该等几个小时再回他的消息才是对的，但是男生可不会这么想。如果你等半天才回，他可能会觉得你不喜欢他，不会觉得这是你故意冷落他的计谋。
Don't just text one-word answers, though – show him that you have something to say. If you two can hold an interesting conversation via text message, you might be able to chat just as well in person. It's a good start, at least.
你也别只回一个字，让他知道你跟他有话说。如果你俩在手机上聊得不错，那当面应该也聊得很好，这至少是个好的开始。
According to experts, the old-school dating technique of playing hard to get actually works: it can make someone who's not head-over-heels for you start to view you as a potential girlfriend. However, it's not the best strategy here because it's not obvious at all – it's way too vague.
专家说，装作很难追到手这种老派约会技巧确实有点用，会让尚未为你倾倒的男生开始把你当做潜在对象。但是这不是最好的主意，太不明显了，太模糊。
How is he supposed to know that when you pretend you're too busy to be asked out that you actually do want to grab dinner? Make sure you're giving off an available vibe so he doesn't think you're a super busy, super off-limits kind of person.
如果你确实想和他共进晚餐，但又一直装出超忙的样子，他怎么可能知道！你得给他一点你“可约”的信号，这样他不会觉得你是一个超忙的，他怎么也追不到的人。
If you can make your crush laugh, you're doing pretty well and he's bound to ask you out super soon.
如果你能逗你喜欢的人笑，那你已经做得非常好了，他会很快来约你的。
Let's be real: trying to make someone jealous is pretty lame. It usually backfires and just isn't the best idea. If you truly like this person and see a future with them, you don't want to mention your ex-boyfriends. At all. Same goes for anyone else you've casually dated recently.
说实话，让别人嫉妒挺差劲的，这通常会事与愿违。如果你确实喜欢这个人，想继续发展，那就别提前男友。一句也别提。也别提最近随便约会的任何人。
If you want this guy to think of you as a love interest, then he needs to think that you're totally available. He won't think that way if you're always bringing up your past loves. Instead, keep your conversations light and positive.
如果你想让这个人对你产生兴趣，就必须让他觉得你是完全可追的。如果你总是提前男友，就可能会打消他的念想了。所以，聊得积极阳光一点。
In a non-creepy way, of course. And it has to make sense. You can't just randomly blurt out that he's so cute, smart, funny, awesome – even if you want to. He'll think you're super weird and your dreams will all be shattered within a single second.
当然你不能夸得很奇怪了，必须夸得有道理。你不能闭着眼说他有多帅、多聪明、多有趣、多厉害——即便你真这么想的。他会觉得你超奇怪，那你的撩汉美梦基本就一秒破碎了。
Make sure your compliments are said in a flirty, joking, light-hearted way – and if you're texting, maybe throw in an adorable emoji in there for good measure. Hey, you don't just compliment anyone. Someone has to earn that praise. He'll get the hint.
夸人时，要夸得既撩人，又像在开玩笑，又很轻松。如果你是发消息，可以发些可爱的表情包。让他感觉到，你可不是随便夸人的哦，你的赞赏只给值得赞美的人。他会知道的。
Don’t ask him out. Ask him to hang out – there’s a big difference and it’s an important one. If you’re super casual and ask him to grab a bite sometime or head to a movie, it’ll leave his head spinning and make him wonder just what’s going on. That’s good – you want him to be confused about whether it’s a real date or a just-as-friends thing.
不要说是约会，只说是一块儿出去玩。二者可是有大区别的，而且，这点很重要哦。如果你就是超随意地约他吃个东西，或者看个电影。那他就会思考，究竟是咋回事儿。这很好啊，因为你就要让他感到困惑，思考到底是货真价实的约会，还是朋友间约着玩。
If he likes you as much as you like him, he’ll make the mood romantic rather than platonic and will make sure that you know how he feels. He won’t want to let it slide and will want to make you his before anyone else can.
如果他也同样喜欢你，那一定会制造出浪漫的恋爱气息，还会想方设法让你知道他的感受。他肯定不会错失良机，抢在别人前面，把你变成那个她。
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