新篇预告｜教我如何不想她（下）

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赵文量杨雨澍艺术中心自7月14日起对外开放的“教我如何不想她——赵文量绘画中的‘母亲’”展上篇已经历时两个多月，这个由赵文量画母亲的钢笔速写为缘起线索的展览在展出过程中，还在根据初始的方案不断深化：艺术家更多丰富的材料、观众在展期中的思考和讨论，都在补充作品观看的视角，从而在下篇生长出更多可能。

9月23日，本周六，“教我如何不想她”将迎来下半部分，展览会在观展动线上与之前进行区分，并依旧保留了那些在情感线索中作为关键节点的作品，如《命运》《思乡曲》《病室》《哈密瓜》等，更换了10幅作品，包括60年代赵文量回抚顺照顾母亲路上所见风景、在母亲病程晚期的肖像、1984年除夕夜赵文量和母亲的对话录音、母亲去世后的大幅风景写生等内容。这些更换的作品情感深厚，是艺术家在身心俱疲的境况下最直接的反映，因此我们对展览的视觉色调进行了相应的调整。我们在这里与大家分享展出的采访文本《搏斗——杨雨澍谈赵文量和母亲》，通过第二视角回溯赵文量曾经的生活节奏，完整这些作品背后的语境。

搏斗‍

——杨雨澍谈赵文量和母亲

采访人：那荣锟

那荣锟（以下简称那）：杨老师您好，我们正在筹备一个关于赵文量“母亲”主题作品的展览。在查阅文献的时候，我发现关于赵文量在1981年至1985年间照顾母亲那段时间的资料不是很多。您那个时候是不是一直陪着他们？关于赵文量先生跟他妈妈之间的关系，您是最了解的一位，我想请问您，赵先生的妈妈是一个怎么样的人？

杨雨澍（以下简称杨）：对，你有问题就随时问我。赵文量妈妈是一位农村老太太，个子特别高，鼻梁也很高，有点深眼窝，后来嫁给赵文量的父亲，叫赵俊。他爸爸上过两个大学，但具体是哪两个大学我记不清了。他会日文、也会俄文，日占时期他在哈尔滨法院里做俄文翻译。他爸爸既善良、也很胆小，但也能做成一件惊天动地的事儿。在日本还没投降之前，他利用工作便利，和他的朋友一起把监狱里的中国人都给放了。那时候日本还没投降呢，非常凶恶。他父亲就在机关枪下把中国人放跑了。监狱里有共产党人、国民党人，还有一些经济犯（有老太太倒腾几斤大米就被日本人抓起来，被称作经济犯）。

兰妈，布面油画，1975年，39×33厘米

Orchid Mother, Oil on canvas, 1975, 39×33 cm

把人从监狱放走之后，赵文量的父亲开始有强烈的威胁感，就从哈尔滨道里逃到了道外。其实那时候人的眼界也窄，道里道外是同一个城市，日本人只要想，就能马上逮捕你。赵文量母亲是家庭妇女，认为他父亲不回家是因为在外面有女人，就要跳河。哈尔滨的河就是松花江，他妈妈到松花江大铁桥上，文量就跟着去，那时候可能也就7岁左右。那么小的孩子，他不知道他妈要做什么，但是能直觉感受到是要做一些不好的事。文量就哭，他妈一看孩子哭，想到要是以后跟了后妈，孩子就要受苦了，最后还是回来了。这是文量的功劳。

那：赵妈妈是在1980年到1985年之间截了肢对吗？

杨：对。他妈妈岁数大了，不爱上医院。过去的人就认为：人吃东西就身体好。其实不见得，过多的营养会导致很多疾病。文量说自己“愚孝”，就是他妈希望什么，他就按照他妈妈的愿望做。他妈爱吃猪头肉、猪拱嘴、猪舌头、内脏、猪尾巴。他就给他妈买回来吃。有一次买了8根猪尾巴，都给炖了。他妈一下吃了一半多。老太太又不太动弹，住在我们帮她盖的一个小屋里，那个小屋只有7米宽，非常小，外边是个大杂院，后边是装订厂。装订厂修暖气，在外边扒了一条沟，他妈就不能出来。文量也不让他妈出来，怕她掉进沟里去。她在家里总盘腿儿坐着，就形成了血栓。

那血栓万幸没掉到心脏里，在腿上一个骨头下面。原本要去医院手术，文量考虑他母亲的意愿，死的时候要全尸，身体发肤，受之父母。最后就不去医院了，采取保守疗法。医院肯定不会到家里给病人看病的，后来是石振宇给找了懂得一点医术的大夫，给开了药。开的什么药是后来才知道的，都是小孩克食的药，它治不了血栓。最后没办法，送到协和，通过我一个学生的关系，住院了。这时候血栓已经把腿上血管堵了，缺氧变黑了。慢慢往上蔓延，最后不得不从很高的位置截肢。

夜（母病），布面油画，1985年，85×70厘米

Night (Mother was Sick), Oil on canvas, 1985, 85×70 cm

那时候医学很差，大夫没有意识到老年人和年轻人的恢复能力不一样，她手术留的那个骨头，和给年轻人做手术一样露在外头，但是年轻人的肉可以很快长上，包好骨头，老太太没那么大生命力。这个骨头露在外头和肉一直分离。文量就给治这个腿，什么酒精啊，这个水儿那个水儿，以至于院里工厂领导视察来，说怎么有医院的味道，一屋都是医务室的味儿。文量妈妈的腿很不好恢复，长上又脱、长上就脱，文量最后终于努力见到成果，肉快贴着骨头上了，但骨头还露着一小截。有一天他妈妈说：“三滨呐，（赵文量小名三滨，）这里面有一瓶子盖儿。”他一看，是那截骨头脱了，说明基本长好了。

这整个过程经历了非常长的时间。这样伺候他妈妈六七年。他妈吃、喝、洗脸、擦身上、洗头，都是他。我说“你妈就一样自己来：喘气。”她老躺床上不动，肠胃不蠕动，屎不往下走。他一摸他妈肚子，有一硬疙瘩，他就得给他妈挤开塞露，然后拿不锈钢的钢勺，用勺慢慢往出引，都这样。他的生物钟完全乱了。只要他妈一叫，他就得起。我说：“你这样，你改变不了你妈越来越衰老的过程，你死了谁管呐。”他妈什么时候叫他，他什么时候去。有一次，他从炕上下来，一下就跪在地上了。他跟我说他觉得腿没了。就是累的。

具体哪一年我记不清了，反正有那么6、7年，赵文量都在为妈妈操劳。他妈岁数大，80多了。文量按家族的基因应该很高寿，但是他没有，他太累。教学、画画，无名画会，各种乱七八糟的事，来外国人采访了，都得他做。我一般是，想画就画、想睡就睡、想吃就吃。我是这样的人，所以我说他累，太认真了，什么事都认真。

那：那个时候，赵老师得一边照顾母亲一边画画吗？他还能画吗？

杨：不画了。他在家里用小纸画了一点画。有一个叫“搏斗”（现名“命运”），就是两个山，黄的天，黄的水，缝里画一个小帆船，冲出去水把它带回来。还有一张“出海”，都不是写生。他只有一幅写生，到北海去画的唯一一幅写生，叫“北海雪”。我跟他说，“你这个画，笔笔皆是，字字珠玑。”我说这画画得非常轻松，点到为止。这个和我们主流的学院的油画是不一样的。

那：照顾妈妈那几年，外面有什么活动他也都不参加？我记得无名画会有过集体展览。

杨：基本不参加，如果是有人学画，就在家看。有人来采访也是。他妈一去世，他大哭。我没有，我觉得他妈没把他带走就不错了。

夕阳独坐，布面油画，1982年，47×30厘米

Sitting Alone at Sunset, Oil on canvas, 1982, 47×30 cm

那：那您当时是跟赵文量住一块吗？

杨：我住那，他有时候跟妈那边，有时候跟我一块。反正我们住一块没别的，就是说话。什么都说，表演艺术、说点文学的，关于生活的。我们在一块睡觉，两个大床，半夜醒了聊天。聊做的梦。做什么梦？最多的梦就是“文革”，一样的梦，“文革”留的的思路它是离不开你，太深了。跟任何人说话都不能像我们俩说话一样，经历都差不多，老在一块，所以就很能说到一块。

那：我还看到赵文量在1986年的一篇文章里面写，他感觉世态炎凉，就只剩下您跟他在一起。

杨：我做的事情就是卖力气，我也做不了别的。比如说他妈上医院，找人去蹬三轮，我得给蹬去，他妈出出进进我得抬；比方说他的垃圾，那时候主要就是煤球，一次积攒的特别多，我得给他弄出来。他买煤气，我替他买去。我就做这个，别的我也做不了。

那：那您那段时间还在出去写生吗？

杨：我也很少出去。文量在家伺候他妈。你让我出去的话我也觉得挺不舒服的，他性格都改变了，出门画画他会说我，那我就不出去了。什么都改变了。所以他妈去世之后我反而觉得终于松了口气。

这之后，经人介绍，我们到了青岛写生。有天正在海边，他坐在那，背着箱子。油画颜料多沉啊，又是笔又是刀的，他背着在那傻坐，我一看他的头发，这不是水里捞出来的水鬼吗！真的很可怕，他活过来了。画画也是一直画不好。直到有一天，旅馆里有一对双胞胎小女孩，他在画听涛的浪花卷着岸边，外头海浪打着石头，飞得跟小坡一样高，再掉下来。那天他画得非常好，就是身体好了。那两个小女孩在旁边唱济公的歌：“鞋儿破、帽儿身上的袈裟破、你笑我、他笑我。”那天我对他说：“你还阳了。”

汇泉听涛，布面油画，1986年，58.5×47厘米

Listen to the Wave at Where Spring Meets, Oil on canvas, 1986, 58.5×47 cm

我们（无名画会）里好多人，一说就是他的哪张画是文量帮忙画的，老愿意回忆从前文量跟他们画画的时候。我可不愿意。我叹息文量把精力和时间都浪费了，画一个简单的静物、简单的风景，还有生活里的各类琐事，这些都浪费了赵文量的艺术才能。我尽量帮他干活，不是帮他画画，这我帮不了，我给他带孩子、倒垃圾、蹬三轮车。我能做这些我就很满意。我一生就两件事：一个是我自己画画，另一个就是我帮他做这些事。我希望他腾出精力来画更多的画，就像我的画天马行空，他的画就是：“我做的梦别人不能做。”即使不能让他多画，能让他在各种重压下喘息，轻松一点，我就很高兴。哪怕轻松一口气，也算我做了点事。

 2023年5月

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1、展厅开放时间为即日起至11月17日期间每周六、日。请于每周五17:00前，扫描二维码填写信息，以预约次日观展。

The exhibition will be open every Saturday and Sunday from July 16 to November 17, 2023. Please scan the QR code and fill in the information before 17:00 every Friday in order to make an appointment to view the exhibition the next day.

2、不符合规则的预约视为无效。

Reservations that do not comply with the rules will be considered invalid.

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The first part of the exhibition "How Can I Rid My Mind of Her: 'Mother' in Zhao Wenliang's Paintings" has lasted for more than two months since July 14th at Zhao Wenliang & Yang Yushu Art Center. This exhibition, which began with Zhao Wenliang's pen sketches of his mother, has continued to deepen in accordance with the initial plan during the course of the exhibition-the artist's rich materials, the audience's reflections and discussions during the exhibition period are all enriching the perspective of the works, and thus more possibilities will grow in the next part of the exhibition.

This Saturday, September 23, the second part of the exhibition will take place, which still retains those works that are key nodes in the emotional clues, such as Destiny, Nostalgic Song, Ward, Rockmelon, etc., and has replaced 10 works, including the scenery Zhao Wenliang saw on the way back to Fushun to take care of his mother in the 1960s, portraits of his mother in the late stages of her illness, recorded conversation between Zhao and his mother on New Year’s Eve in 1984, large-scale landscape sketches after her death, etc. These replacement works are more emotionally profound and are the most direct reflection of the artist's physical and mental exhaustion. So we have adjusted the visual tone of the exhibition accordingly. We share with you here the text of the interview on display, Combat: Yang Yushu on Zhao Wenliang and Zhao's Mother, which retraces the rhythm of Zhao Wenliang's former life through a second perspective, completing the context behind these works.

Combat: Yang Yushu on Zhao Wenliang and Zhao’s Mother

Interviewer: Na Rongkun

Na Rongkun (Na): Glad to have you here Mr Yang. We are curating an exhibition on "Mother" in Zhao Wenliang's paintings. Not much information about Zhao Wenliang between 1981 and 1985 was found. Were you with them all through then? Speak about the relationship between Zhao Wenliang and his mother, you must know best. May I ask what kind of person she was? 

Yang Yushu (Yang): Well, you can always ask me if you have any questions. Zhao's mother is an old lady from the countryside. She is particularly tall, with a high bridge of the nose and deep eye sockets. Later, she married Zhao's father, Zhao Jun, who attended two universities. I cannot tell exactly which two. He knew Japanese and Russian, and once worked as a Russian interpreter in a Harbin court during the Japanese occupation. His father was kind and timid, but he did something astonishing. Before Japan surrendered, he made use of his job convenience to free all the Chinese people in prison with some of his friends. You should know that Japan hadn't surrendered yet then and they were very vicious. His father set those Chinese prisoners free at gunpoint. They were people from the Communist party and the Kuomintang party, also economic criminals. Some elderly ladies were even arrested by the Japanese for merely possessing a few pounds of rice, which were alleged economic criminals. 

After freeing those people, Zhao's father felt threatened whereupon he fled from Harbin to Daowai. People were with narrow visions in those days, in fact, Daonei and Daowai were the same city, where the Japanese could catch you if they want. Zhao Wenliang's mother, a housewife, thought Zhao's father were having affairs with other women since he didn't return home, so she decided to jump into the river. The river in Harbin is the Songhua river. She stood on the iron bridge of the Songhua river, while Zhao followed her, probably at his age of seven. As a kid he didn't know what his mother was going to do, but he relized something bad may happen. Zhao cried, and when his mother saw him crying, she thought that the kid would suffer if he lived with a stepmother. So she quitted jumping and came back. This is Zhao's contribution. 

红天，纸本油画，1975年，20.3×16.2厘米

Red Sky, Oil on paper, 1975, 20.3×16.2 cm

Na: As for Zhao's mother, were her legs amputated between 1980 and 1985? 

Yang: Right, his elderly mother didn't love going to the hospital because of her old age. People from that generation used to believe that people eat to be healthy, but that's not really. Excessive nutrition can lead to many diseases. Zhao said himself that his filial piety as "foolish", that is, he would do whatever his mother wished. His mother favors pig head, pig snout, pig tongue, offal, intestines and pig tail. He satisfied his mother's appetite. He bought his mother eight pig tails and stewed them all. His mother could eat them more than half of them at once. The old lady didn't move much and lived in the tiny seven-square-meter hut we built for her, with a large compound outside and a bindery behind. The bindery was repairing the heating, and a ditch was cut into the outside, so his mother failed to come outside. Zhao didn't let his mother go out either. fearing she would fall into the ditch. She always sat there with her leg crossed, hence here came thrombus. 

Fortunately, the clot grew under a bone in her leg instead of falling into her heart. Initially, they decided to go to the hospital for surgery. Zhao considered that his mother would like to die with her body intact, as our bodies, to every hair and bit of skin, are received by us from our parents. At last, they quitted going to the hospital and adopted the conservative therapy. Hospitals don't visit patients at home. Soon afterwards, Shi Zhenyu found someone who knew some leechcraft and gave prescriptions. It was only later did we know what prescription it was. Those were all medicines for children's digestion, which were no use for thrombus. In the end, there was no choice but to take her to Peking Union Medical College Hospital, and she was hospitalized through one of my student's networking. Thrombus blocked the blood vessel, causing the leg to turn black due to lack of oxygen. It gradually spread upward and eventually had to be amputated from a high position. Medicine knowledge was poor back then, the doctor thought the aged were equal to youngsters, and that the bone she left after the operation was the same as younger ones. However, the youngster's flesh could regenerate, but the old lady didn't have such vitality. Flesh fell off the exposed bone. Zhao treated this leg with alcohol, all sorts of water, so focused that at inspection the factory leader said that the room smelled like the clinic. The old lay's leg was hard to heal, the flesh grew and fell off repeatedly. Zhao finally made best effort and the flesh was almost sticking to the bone, yet the bone was still revealed a little. One day, his mother said, "Sanbin (Zhao Wenliang's nickname), there is a bottle of caps." He saw the bone fell off, meaning that it was almost recovered. 

“母亲”系列，纸本速写，1980年，15.5×21厘米

Mother series, Sketch on paper, 1980, 15.5×21 cm

This took a pretty long time, taking care of his mother like this for six or seven years. He did all the dieting, drinking, face washing, body wiping, and hair washing for his mother. I said, "your mother did only one thing that is breathing." She often laid on there still, gastrointestinal hostility and bowel movement were poor. He felt his mother's belly, there was a solid lump inside, then he used glycerine enema and a stainless-steel spoon, poking the spoon handle in to slowly draw the shit out. His bio-clock was completely messed up. As long as his mother called, he had to get up. I said, "You can't stop your mother's aging process even like this. Who cares if you die." He would go whenever his mother asked him to. Once he got off bed and fell to his knees. He told me he couldn't feel his legs. It was just exhaustion.

I can't remember which exact year it was, but it was about six or seven years anyway. His mother was over eighty. Wenliang was supposed to enjoy longevity with his mother's gene, but he didn't, he was much too overworked. Teaching, painting, the No Name Group, all these messy stuff, interviews with foreign visitors, he had to do it all. Generally, I do what I want, whether it's painting, sleeping, or eating. I am such a person. But Wenliang, he was exhausted and deadly earnest, taking everything serious.

Na: That time he had to take care of his mother meanwhile painting, right? Was he able to paint?

Yang: No painting. He did a little drawing at home. One is titled Combat (now titled Destiny), which contains two mountains, a yellow sky and yellow water, also a small sailboat drawn in the seam, rushing out and brought back by the water. Another one titled Sailing was not painted directly from nature either. The sole sketch is painted in Beihai titled Snow in Beihai. I told him, "this painting is compact and concise but profound." I said that this painting effortlessly stopped where it should. It differs from the mainstream institutional oil painting.

Na: Did he stay away from any social events during the years when he was taking care of his mother? I remembered there were exhibitions of the No Name Group.

Yang: Basically no. If someone is studying painting, he'd guide at home. So did interviews. He wailed when his mother passed away. I didn't. It's good enough that his mother didn't take him away at the same time.

哭，纸本素描，1984年，28.5×20.5厘米

Weep Sketch on paper, 1984, 28.5×20.5 cm

Na: Did you live with Zhao Wenliang then?

Yang: I lived there. He sometimes spent time with his mother and sometimes with me. Anyway, we did nothing but chatting when we lived together. We talked about everything, performance art, literature, life. We slept together on two big beds, and in the middle of the night, we chatted when we woke up, chatting about dreams we dreamt. What kind of dreams? The most frequent dreams were about the Cultural Revolution, the same dream. The intellectual impact that the Cultural Revolution had left was inseparable from you, it was just too deep. Talking with any others was not like the talk between the two of us. Our experiences were akin to each other, and that's why we were always together, our chats resonate.

Na: I read in the essay he wrote in 1986 that he felt snobbish in the cold world, and you are the only one with him. 

Yang: What I did was just labouring, I couldn't do anything else. For example, his mother went to hospital and needed someone to pedal a tricycle, I had to pedal it, and I had to carry his mother in and out. Let's say his rubbish, mainly briquettes that were stored and gathered a lot at a time, and I had to throw them out for him. I bought gas for him. These are what I used to do, I can do nothing more. 

Na: Did you do outdoor sketching at that time? 

Yang: Seldom either. Zhao was looking after his mother at home. If you ask me to go out, I feel uneasy as well. His personality changed at times. He complained when I went out painting, so I stopped. Everything had changed, so I felt relieved when his mother passed away. 

Introduced by others, we visited Qingdao to sketch. One day he sat there by the sea, carried with his artist kit and heavy pigments including brushes and drawknives. I looked at his hair, he looks like a spectre salvaged from the water. It was horrible, alive, yet he couldn't paint well. Until one day, there was a pair of twin sisters, when Zhao was painting raging waves pounding on the bank, waves hitting rocks as high as a soil slope. That day he painted excellently, simply because he was in health. Those two girls sang aside, a song of Ji Gong: "shoes broken, hats broken, cassock broken, you laugh me, he laugh me." That day I said to him: "you return to life." 

无题，纸本油画，1968年冬，15.7×15厘米

Untitled, Oil on paper, Winter, 1968, 15.7×15cm

Many of us (No Name Group) often say that Zhao helped paint this and that paintings. They often recalled the age when Zhao drew with them, but I wouldn't. I sigh at the amount of energy and time Zhao has wasted painting plain still lives and mediocre landscapes, plus the secular trivia. I did my best to assist him in labouring rather than painting, which I couldn't. I bring up kids, empty the trash, pedal the tricycle, these are things I'm satisfied with. There are only two things in my whole life: one is to paint on my own, the other is to help him with things mentioned above. I want him to free up his energy to paint more, just like my paintings are unconstrained and his are "dreams that others shouldn't dream about", so to speak. Even if I can't make him paint more, I'm glad that he can take a breath and find a little relief under all pressures because of me. 

May, 2023 

艺术家 Artist

艺术家赵文量生于哈尔滨。1956年报考央美时创作了真正意义上的处女作《大树麦田》，但因评价当时绘画“千篇一律”而落榜。次年进入北京熙化美术补习学校正式开始学习油画，1959年与杨雨澍相识，并逐渐结识后来成为“无名画会”中坚力量的张达安、石振宇等人，常常相约一同绘画。在多地创作受阻后开始外出至玉渊潭公园等地写生，此即“玉渊潭画派”的起点，1979年为办展而更名为“无名画会”。之后的六年里赵文量一直照顾母亲，在母亲离世后近20年中多次远游写生。终其一生，赵文量一直坚持创作，以艺术为志业，直至2019年因病离世。

Zhao Wenliang was born in Harbin. He created literally his first work Tree and Cornfield, when applying to the Central Academy of Fine Arts in 1956. He was rejected, because he commented that paintings at that time were all "stereotyped". In 1957, he went to Xihua Art Preparatory School to study oil painting. There he got acquainted with Yang Yushu as well as Zhang Da'an and Shi Zhenyu, who later became core members of the No Name Group. They frequently got together to paint plein air all over Beijing. Facing many restrictions in places nearby, they shifted their painting spot to Yuyuantan Park, marking the start of so-called "Yuyuantan School of Painting". It was changed to the No Name Group when they mounted an exhibition in 1979. In the following six years, Zhao took care of his sick mother until her passing. After that, he travelled afar to make plein air paintings many times for 20 years. Zhao has devoted his whole life to art and kept painting till he died of illness in 2019.

策展人 Curator

那荣锟，中间美术馆策展助理。本硕就读于清华大学美术学院绘画系，关注社会中被忽视、遗忘的碎片，策划有展览“教我如何不想她——赵文量绘画中的‘母亲’”；编辑有画册《广阔的现实主义道路——20世纪20—80年代摄影的人文实践》。

Na Rongkun serves as a curatorial assistant of Inside-Out Art Museum. She completed undergraduate and master studies in the Department of Painting, Academy of Arts & Design, Tsinghua University, focuses on neglected and forgotten fragments in society. She curated “How Can I Rid My Mind of Her: ‘Mother’ in Zhao Wenliang's Paintings”, and edited the research achievement Infinite Realism: Humanism in Chinese Photography from 1920s to 1980s.

海报：屈莹

采访翻译：李御瑄 

校对：陈静怡

正在展出 What's On

北京中间美术馆

Beijing Inside-Out Art Museum

意义

Meaning

中间艺术基金会赵文量与杨雨澍艺术中心

Zhao Wenliang & Yang Yushu Art Centre

教我如何不想她——赵文量绘画中的“母亲”

How Can I Rid My Mind of Her: "Mother" in Zhao Wenliang's Paintings