毕业季 | 桑德伯格在加州伯克利分校演讲【上】
2016年5月15日，Facebook首席运营官桑德伯格（Sheryl Sandberg）在加州伯克利分校毕业典礼上发表致辞演讲
"当悲剧来袭，你们拥有扛过任何事的能力"
https://v.qq.com/txp/iframe/player.html?vid=f0300j2q69m&width=500&height=375&auto=0
Thank you, Marie. And thank you esteemed members of the faculty, proud parents, devoted friends, squirming siblings.
谢谢Marie。谢谢尊敬的教师们、家长们、朋友们和所有的兄弟姐妹们。
Congratulations to all of you … and especially to the magnificent[极好的;壮丽的;令人羡慕的] Berkeley graduating class of 2016!
祝贺大家…尤其是伯克利2016级的毕业生们！
It is a privilege to be here at Berkeley, which has produced so many Nobel Prize winners, Turing Award winners, astronauts, members of Congress, Olympic gold medalists … and that's just the women!
在伯克利求学是一件幸事，这里产生了如此多的诺贝尔奖得主、图灵奖获得者、宇航员、国会议员和奥运会金牌得主，而且是女性！
Berkeley has always been ahead of the times. In the 1960s, you led the Free Speech Movement. Back in those days, people used to say that with all the long hair, how do we even tell the boys from the girls? We now know the answer: manbuns.
伯克利学校永远走在时代前列。20世纪60年代，这里领导了自由言论运动。回顾当年，人人都留着长发，很多人不知道还能如何区分男女？现在我们知道答案了：Manbuns。
[注释]man bun：一种男性在头上扎小发髻的发型
Early on, Berkeley opened its doors to the entire population. When this campus opened in 1873, the class included 167 men and 222 women. It took my alma mater[母校;校歌] another ninety years to award a single degree to a single woman.
伯克利在早期就向所有人打开了大门。1873年刚刚建校时，学校就有167位男性和222位女性。我的母校在90年后才为一位女性颁发了学位证书。
One of the women who came here in search of opportunity was Rosalind Nuss. Roz grew up scrubbing[(尤指用硬刷,肥皂和水)擦洗,刷洗] floors in the Brooklyn boardinghouse[公寓;供膳食的寄宿处] where she lived. She was pulled out of high school by her parents to help support their family. One of her teachers insisted that her parents put her back into school — and in 1937, she sat where you are sitting today and received a Berkeley degree.
其中一位来这里深造的女性是罗莎琳德•努斯。来到布鲁克林之前，罗莎琳德在布鲁克林一间公寓擦地为生。她的父母为了让她补贴家用所以让她辍学了。她的一位老师坚持让她父母送她回学校，并且在1937年，她坐在了今天你们坐的位置获得了伯克利大学的学位。
Roz was my grandmother. She was a huge inspiration to me and I'm so grateful that Berkeley recognized her potential. I want to take a moment to offer a special congratulations to the many here today who are the first generation in their families to graduate from college. What a remarkable achievement.
罗莎琳德就是我祖母。她对我而言是一个巨大的鼓舞，我非常感激伯克利发现了她的潜能。我想特别跟今天坐在这里的，家族里第一代大学生说一声恭喜。这是非常有意义的成就。
Today is a day of celebration. A day to celebrate all the hard work that got you to this moment.
今天是庆祝的日子。庆祝你们为这一刻所做的一切努力。
Today is a day of thanks. A day to thank those who helped you get here — nurtured you, taught you, cheered you on, and dried your tears. Or at least the ones who didn't draw on you with a Sharpie[记号笔] when you fell asleep at a party.
今天是感谢的日子。感谢那些帮助你们来到这里的人，那些培养过你、教育过你、为你欢呼过的人和为你擦拭过眼泪的人，或者至少要感谢那些当你在party上快睡着的时候用记号笔戏弄你的人。
[注释]Sharpie：美国三福记号笔
Today is a day of reflection. Because today marks the end of one era of your life and the beginning of something new.
今天是沉思的日子。因为今天是你生命中一个时代的结束，一个新的时代的开始。
A commencement address[毕业典礼致辞] is meant to be a dance between youth and wisdom. You provide the youth. Someone comes up here to be the voice of wisdom — that's supposed to be me. I stand up here and tell you all the things I have learned in life, you throw your cap[扔帽子] in the air, you let your family take a million photos — don't forget to post them on Instagram — and everyone goes home happy.
毕业典礼上的致词意味着一场青春和智慧之间的舞蹈。你们拥有青春。来这里发表演讲的人应该为智慧代言。我站在这里，我应该将我在生活中学到的所有东西与你们分享。然后，你们会将帽子扔到空中，和你们的家人一起拍照留影，——不要忘了将它们发布在Instagram上，最后你们每个人将高高兴兴地回家。
Today will be a bit different. We will still do the caps and you still have to do the photos. But I am not here to tell you all the things I've learned in life. Today I will try to tell you what I learned in death.
但今天会有点不同。你们仍然会仍帽子，会拍摄无数照片。但我到这里来不是要告诉大家我在生活中学到的东西。今天，我会努力告诉你们我从死亡中学到的东西。
I have never spoken publicly about this before. It's hard. But I will do my very best not to blow my nose[擦鼻涕] on this beautiful Berkeley robe[长袍,礼服;制服].
我以前从未公开谈论过这一点。这是一件艰难的事。但我会尽力不让自己用这身好看的伯克利长袍擦鼻涕的(但我会尽量让我说的话不至于扫兴)。
One year and 13 days ago, I lost my husband, Dave. His death was sudden and unexpected. We were at a friend's 50th birthday party in Mexico. I took a nap[小睡一会儿]. Dave went to work out[锻炼]. What followed was the unthinkable — walking into a gym to find him lying on the floor. Flying home to tell my children that their father was gone. Watching his casket[棺材;骨灰盒] being lowered into the ground.
一年零十三天前，我失去了我的丈夫，戴夫。他的死亡是突然和意外的。我们在墨西哥参加朋友的五十岁生日聚会。我睡了个午觉。戴夫出去了。随之而来的事情是无法想象的，我进了一个健身房，发现他躺在地板上。我坐飞机回家，告诉我的孩子他们的父亲走了。然后看着他的骨灰盒深埋在地下。
For many months afterward, and at many times since, I was swallowed up[被淹没;吞下去;耗尽] in the deep fog of grief — what I think of as the void — an emptiness that fills your heart, your lungs, constricts your ability to think or even to breathe.
在我丈夫去世后的好几个月里，我许多次深深陷入悲伤，我觉得这种悲伤如同虚空一样，充满你的心脏、你的肺部，使你变得不能思考甚至不能呼吸。
Dave's death changed me in very profound ways. I learned about the depths of sadness and the brutality[无情;残忍] of loss. But I also learned that when life sucks you under[=suck down], you can kick against the bottom, break the surface, and breathe again. I learned that in the face of the void — or in the face of any challenge — you can choose joy and meaning.
戴夫的死深刻地改变了我。我感受到了悲伤的深刻和失去的残酷。但我也明白了，当生活让你陷入悲伤之海，你可以奋力挣扎、让自己的头浮出海面，再次呼吸。我明白了，在面对空虚或任何挑战时，你都可以选择快乐和意义。
译2：当生活将你吸入谷底时，你依然可以从谷底站起来，打破封印，重见光明。我学会了面对空虚或任何挑战，你都可以选择快乐和找到意义。
I'm sharing this with you in the hopes that today, as you take the next step in your life, you can learn the lessons that I only learned in death. Lessons about hope, strength, and the light within us that will not be extinguished[熄灭;灭绝].
我今天和你们分享这个是希望在你们可以在接下来的生活里学会我在死亡中才学到的东西。这是关于希望、强大和无法从我们我们心中永不熄灭的光亮的一课。
Everyone who has made it through Cal has already experienced some disappointment. You wanted an A but you got a B. OK, let's be honest — you got an A- but you're still mad. You applied for an internship at Facebook, but you only got one from Google. She was the love of your life … but then she swiped left. Game of Thrones[权力的游戏] the show has diverged way too much from the books — and you bothered to read all 4,352 pages.
每个人都已经经历了一些挫折。你想要一个A，但你只得到了一个B。您申请到Facebook实习，但你只得到去谷歌实习的机会。她是你生命中的至爱……但她离开了。《权力的游戏》中的电视剧和原著太不一样了，而你不想去读4352页的书。
[注释]加州大学伯克利分校（University of California, Berkeley），简称伯克利（Cal），位于美国旧金山湾区伯克利市。
You will almost certainly face more and deeper adversity[逆境;不幸;灾难]. There's loss of opportunity: the job that doesn't work out, the illness or accident that changes everything in an instant[瞬间]. There's loss of dignity: the sharp sting of prejudice when it happens. There's loss of love: the broken relationships that can't be fixed. And sometimes there's loss of life itself.
你一定会面对更多、更深的困境。有机会的损失：你失去了工作，疾病或事故在瞬间改变了一切。有尊严的丧失：尖锐的偏见刺痛了你。有爱的损失：某种亲密关系破碎了，无法再修复。有时还有生命本身的失去。
Some of you have already experienced the kind of tragedy and hardship that leave an indelible[不可磨灭的,忘不掉的] mark. Last year, Radhika, the winner of the University Medal, spoke so beautifully about the sudden loss of her mother.
你们当中有些人已经经历过那种铭心刻骨的悲剧和苦难。去年这个时候，大学奖章得主拉迪卡的母亲突然去世了。
The question is not if some of these things will happen to you
44 34737 44 15536 0 0 3044 0 0:00:11 0:00:05 0:00:06 3044. They will. Today I want to talk about what happens next. About the things you can do to overcome adversity, no matter what form it takes or when it hits you. The easy days ahead of you will be easy. It is the hard days — the times that challenge you to your very core — that will determine who you are. You will be defined not just by what you achieve, but by how you survive.
现在的问题不是这些事情是否会发生在你身上。它们肯定会。现在我想谈的是这些事情发生之后怎么办，我们可以做些什么以摆脱困境，无论它们是什么样的困境，无论它们何时打击了你。轻松的日子很容易度过，问题是那些艰难的日子，是那些挑战你的内心深处的日子，它们将决定你是谁。（决定你是谁的不仅是你得到的东西，还包括你在困境中如何活下去/决定你是谁的不仅是你的成就，还包括你如何克服困境。）
A few weeks after Dave died, I was talking to my friend Phil about a father-son activity that Dave was not here to do. We came up with a plan to fill in for[代替;占据别人的位置] Dave. I cried to him, "But I want Dave." Phil put his arm around me and said, "Option A is not available. So let's just kick the shit out of option B."
戴夫去世几个星期后，我和我的朋友菲尔谈论一场需要父亲参加的亲子活动，戴夫无法参加。我们想出了一个暂时用别人代替戴夫的计划。我哭着对他说：“但我想要戴夫。”菲尔搂住我说：选项A是不可能的。所以我们只能用该死的选项B代替。”
[注释]
beat the shit out of someone / kick the shit out of someone, knock the shit out of someone：to beat someone very hard
the shit out of sb/sth：used to emphasize the degree of force of an action that you are describing
His dad would beat/knock/kick the shit out of him if he disobeyed.
Don't sneak up on me like that - you scared the shit out of me.
We all at some point live some form of option B. The question is: What do we do then?
在某些时候，我们都是在以选项B的方式活着。问题是：我们该怎么办呢？
As a representative of Silicon Valley, I'm pleased to tell you there is data to learn from. After spending decades studying how people deal with setbacks, psychologist Martin Seligman found that there are three P's — personalization, pervasiveness, and permanence — that are critical to how we bounce back from[迅速恢复活力;重新振作] hardship. The seeds of resilience[恢复力] are planted in the way we process the negative events in our lives.
“作为硅谷的一员，(我很高兴地告诉你我这么说是有科学依据的/我很高兴告诉你这是有数据可循的)。在花费几十年的时间研究人们如何面对挫折之后，心理学家马丁·塞利格曼（Martin Seligman）发现，三个P——个性化（personalization）、普遍性（ pervasiveness）和持久性（permanence）——这是我们从困境中振作起来的关键。恢复力的种子就种在我们经历挫折的过程中。
The first P is personalization — the belief that we are at fault[出毛病;感到困惑]. This is different from taking responsibility, which you should always do. This is the lesson that not everything that happens to us happens because of us.
第一个P是个人化——相信是我们自己出了问题。这与承担责任不是一回事，承担责任是我们时刻应该做的。我们应该明白，并非发生在我们身上的一切都是因为我们自己。
When Dave died, I had a very common reaction, which was to blame myself. He died in seconds from a cardiac arrhythmia[心律失常;心律不整;心律紊乱]. I pored over[集中精神地阅读;注视] his medical records asking what I could have — or should have — done. It wasn't until I learned about the three P's that I accepted that I could not have prevented his death. His doctors had not identified his coronary artery disease[冠状动脉疾病/冠心病]. I was an economics major; how could I have?
当大卫死了的时候，我有一个非常常见的反应——责怪自己。他是在几秒钟内死于心脏病突发的。我翻开他的病历，不停地问我自己：我本来可以做些什么，那样戴夫就不会死了。直到我了解了三个P，我才接受我不能阻止他的死亡这个事实。他的医生们没有发现他的冠心病。我是学经济学的，我怎么可能发现？
Studies show that getting past personalization can actually make you stronger. Teachers (who knew they could do better after students failed) adjusted their methods and saw future classes go on to excel. College swimmers who underperformed[表现不佳] but believed they were capable of swimming faster did. Not taking failures personally allows us to recover — and even to thrive.
研究表明，(停止埋怨自己是可以逐渐让你变得更加强大的方法之一/经历个性化过程可以让你变得强大)。一个有能力但是却无法令学生适应他教学方法的老师在走出自责之后，可以在未来的教学中做得更加出色。而学校的游泳运动员在原谅自己偶尔的发挥失常之后，也通常可以获得更加出色的成绩。(不要总是将失败完全归咎于自己。这样你才能够快速走出失意，甚至做得更好/不要把失败都算到自己头上，我们才能克服。)
The second P is pervasiveness — the belief that an event will affect all areas of your life. You know that song "Everything is awesome?" This is the flip: "Everything is awful." There's no place to run or hide from the all-consuming sadness.
第二个P是普遍性——相信事件会影响你生活的各个领域。你知道有一首歌叫《一切都是极好的》？还有它的反面《一切都是可怕的》。人们往往以为，（如果我们生活中出现了吞噬一切的悲哀，我们将无处可逃/在吞噬一切的悲伤面前，我们无处可逃）。
The child psychologists I spoke to encouraged me to get my kids back to their routine as soon as possible. So 10 days after Dave died, they went back to school and I went back to work. I remember sitting in my first Facebook meeting in a deep, deep haze[阴霾;薄雾]. All I could think was, "What is everyone talking about and how could this possibly matter?" But then I got drawn into the discussion and for a second — a brief split second — I forgot about death.
儿童心理学家鼓励我尽快让我的孩子回到正常的生活轨道。于是戴夫去世十天后，他们又回到学校，我则回到工作岗位。我记得我在丈夫去世后头一次参加Facebook的会议，（精神陷入恍惚/整个人都被阴霾笼罩）。我心里想的都是，他们所有人在讲些什么，这些和我有关系吗？但后来我被卷入了讨论，并且有一秒，非常短暂的一秒钟，我忘记了死亡。
That brief second helped me see that there were other things in my life that were not awful. My children and I were healthy. My friends and family were so loving and they carried us — quite literally at times.
那短暂的一秒使我看到我的生活中还有其他并不可怕的东西。我的孩子和我是健康的。我的朋友和家人都那么可爱，而且他们经常是我们的依靠。
The loss of a partner often has severe negative financial consequences, especially for women. So many single mothers — and fathers — struggle to make ends meet[收支相抵;量入为出] or have jobs that don't allow them the time they need to care for their children. I had financial security, the ability to take the time off I needed, and a job that I did not just believe in, but where it's actually OK to spend all day on Facebook. Gradually, my children started sleeping through the night, crying less, playing more.
失去伴侣往往会产生严重的负面经济后果，尤其是对女性而言。因此，许多单身母亲和父亲都会为生存而奋斗，繁忙的工作往往不允许他们有照顾孩子的时间。但我有经济保障，有可以自由支配的时间，有一份我热爱的工作。渐渐地，我的孩子们开始在晚上睡得安稳了，哭得少了，玩得多了。
未完待续。
因受字数限制，故将演讲全文分为上下两部分。
中文参考：http://t.cn/RqDuPPv 和 http://t.cn/RqDDwJv
英文原文：http://t.cn/RqDezsw
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