How I make love with my PMS

I’m now three days from my menstruation (it synchronizes perfectly with full moon).

Two days ago, I was ecstatic about not feeling any PMS (premenstrual syndrome) symptom this time. Until I felt terribly defeated by a challenge at work yesterday afternoon. 

Different women experience different things in PMS, some mainly feel physical discomfort, some mainly feel irritable, while I mainly feel sadness, frustration, self-doubt and low self-worth.

When I woke up this morning, I didn’t feel like enthusiastically jumping on to my yoga mat as usual. I tried to do something but couldn’t focus.

So I reached out.

I posted in my moments and a women's group asking people for loving words-What you really love about me? What’s the unique strength you see in me? How exactly have I inspired you?

And the response I got melted my heart.

I usually don’t ask for love like that. I only do it when I feel so vulnerable that I have to.

I actually need lots of love, if I don’t allow myself to express my needs fully, life will never stop manifesting dramatically vulnerable moments to push me.     

I used to think PMS is more of a constructed idea. I once read an article arguing the myth of PMS is just there to give women an excuse to unleash their emotions, since women are often expected to be always gentle and loving.

I used to think the hormonal change does have an impact on us, but there are so many other factors that influence on our physical and emotional well-being, is hormonal change really that special?

I have very comfortable menstruation. No cramp, no low energy. I can dance and make love normally. If I can be free from painful menstruation, why can’t I be free from PMS?

I do believe I can be free from it after really fulfilling its purpose.

Once I got an intuitive message about PMS (this might be totally personal, but might also ring a bell in you): 

The womb diligently prepares itself for creating a new life, when it realizes no new life is coming, it needs to get rid of the useless preparation, and it might feel frustrated and unappreciated about the futility of all the work. 

The frustration of the womb can totally trigger the frustration about my life. And the solution is to give appreciation and love to the womb and consciously direct this creative energy to somewhere else (such as a project).

When I experience this intense frustration each month, I have to rethink what I really want to do in my life-is there something so strong that can stay unshakable even during the most difficult time?  

Actually, PMS doesn’t really bring random emotions, it mainly magnifies those emotions that we already have. It makes them scream so that we have to face them.

PMS makes me more sensitive-not more negative, not more fragile, just more sensitive. I’m more connected with my feelings and feel more comfortable to express them in time. I can allow myself to be more feminine. 

Seeing from this angle, it really feels more of a blessing than a curse. 

It’s said that there are many things you can do to relieve PMS, such as diet adjustment, supplement, essential oils...I’m not the best person to talk about them, since none of them really worked for me.

What works for me is understanding the message it carries and taking actions accordingly.

What works best for me generally in life is embracing whatever is present in my experience and making love with it-see it, hear it, accept it, use it as a fuel for growth and co-create with it.  

May you make love with all. 

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