【双语】50条脑洞大开神回复
来源：沪江英语、可可英语
中国哪里的姑娘最漂亮？
Where can you find the most beautiful girls in China?
“
微信朋友圈。
WeChat Moments.
”
请给出一句很有内涵的诗句。
Please name a thought-provoking sentence from a poem.
“
一懒众衫小。
Once lazy, all your clothes get smaller.
”
如何理解“穷不是一种状态”？
What's the meaning of 'poverty is not a certain situation'?
“
穷是一种常态。
It's the common situation.
”
参观一个世界奇观时
你最想了解哪些信息？
What do you want to know the most when you visit a World Wonder?
“
这附近有什么好吃的吗？
What can I find to eat around there?
”
如果被车撞飞10米远，
爬起来之后说什么最帅？
What is the coolest thing to say after you have got hit by a car and managed to stand up again?
“
下一辆！
Next!
”
Mother, what am I to you?
“
妈的智障。
My karma.
”
为什么前女友还会一直关注我呢？
What could be the reason that my ex still follows me on social networks?
“
知道你过得不好我也就放心了。
Knowing that you still mess everything up makes my day.
”
为什么打群架的时候
普遍会脱掉上衣？
Why do people usually take off their clothes when starting a gang fight?
“
假如脱掉裤子的话，
总觉得有哪里不对，气氛怪怪的。
Because it would be weird to take off your pants.
”
哪件事，
让你对自己的无知感到震惊？
What is the experience in which you got shocked by your own ignorance?
“
小时候写作文要写笔名，
我写了“中华绘图铅笔”。
Back when I was little,
we were required to write down our pen names.
And I wrote down the name of my pen's brand.
”
怎么反驳“你行你上啊”的逻辑？
How should I respond to 'You can you up'?
“
我评论个鸡蛋不好吃，还得自己下个蛋啊？
So I need to lay an egg to comment on an egg's flavor?
”
如何一个月减肥40斤？
By what means can I lose 20 kilograms in a month?
“
截肢。
Amputation.
”
怎样含蓄地表达
「我已经被收买了」
How can I subtly suggest that I've been compromised?
“
我说句公道话……
Let me say this impartially...
”
如何追求学医的女生？
How to chase a girl majoring in medicine?
“
你好，我有病。
Hi, I'm sick.
”
为什么你长痘痘？
Why do you have pimples?
“
因为我可爱得冒泡。
Because I'm just bubble-bubbly cute.
”
你们夫妻每月挣多少钱？
How much do you two earn per month?
“
我月收入一万，
加上我老婆可以到两千。
My monthly income is 10,000.
And it can get to 2,000 with my wife's contribution.
”
打雷的时候关窗户有用吗？
Does it work to close the window when it's thundering outside?
“
没用的，我试过了，
关了窗雷一样在打。
No, it won't. I've tried.
It was still thundering outside after I closed the window.
”
你见过哪些概率极小极小的事件？
What extremly-small-probability event have you witnessed?
“
20道完形填空，全错。
Done a cloze test of 20 questions
with 0 answer right.
”
我要如何才能显得很高冷？
How can I look high-end and cool?
“
搬去喜马拉雅。
Move to the Himalayas.
”
两千元人民币，想出国穷游
可以去哪些国家？
To which country can I do a budget travel with 2,000 RMB?
“
秦鲁齐蜀韩郑魏楚赵燕吴等等...
For example,
all the principalities in ancient China.
”
为什么在洗完澡之后
有些人会觉得自己变漂亮了？
Why do some people find themselves prettier after they take a shower?
“
脑子进水了。
The brain has water damage.
”
呆萌和脑残的界限是？
What is the boundry between 'clumsy' and 'stupid'?
“
“和”。
"and".
”
你临死前的遗言是什么？
What would you say before you die?
“
能不能换个医生试试？
我觉得我还能活……
Can we try another doctor?
I think I can still be worked on...
”
为什么女生有体香，而男生没有？
Why do women give out sweet scent but men don't?
“
化妆品腌入味了。
The makeup is fermenting.
”
男生说什么话
女生会觉得很大气？
What would be manly for a man to say in front of a girl?
“
买！
I'll pay.
”
因为胖不敢去操场跑步怎么办？
I dare not go to the playground for running. What should I do?
“
你怎么敢去食堂？
How dare you go to the canteen?
”
你看《我是歌手》吗？
Do you know I'm a Singer?
“
不是。
No, you're not.
”
热恋是一种怎样的体验？
How does it feel to love somebody insanely?
“
两个长得像猪一样的人
还怕对方被抢走了。
Two people who are on no aspect attractive worry about each other being stolen by someone else.
”
有什么赞扬让你比较尴尬？
Is there any compliment that makes you awkward?
“
人不可貌相啊！
We really cannot judge a book by its cover, can we?
”
你怎么一个人逛街啊？
Why are you shopping all by yourself?
“
半个人逛街我怕吓着你。
I fear it would scare you to death if half of me were shopping.
”
单身两年以上是什么体验？
How does it feel to be single for more than 2 years?
“
单身22年
不知道你说的是哪两年？
I've been single for 22 years.
Which 2 years are you suggesting?
”
你收到的最可怕的礼物是什么？
What is the most terrifying present you've ever received?
“
一本书，叫《百年孤独》。
A book named One Hundred Years of Solitude.
”
要是在古代，
姐的颜值能撑起整个青楼。
Back in the ancient times, a face like mine can hold a whole brothel.
“
你是说你长得像柱子吗？
You mean you look like a pillar?
”
很高兴为你服务。
I'm glad to be at your service.
“
你高兴得太早了。
You'll find out you got glad too fast.
”
超人为什么要穿紧身衣？
Why does the superman wear tights?
“
救人要紧。
(To save people with tights.)
It is important to save people.
”
妈，我能看电视吗？
Mom, can I watch the television?
“
当然可以啊，只要不打开就行。
Of course you can, as long as it's turned off.
”
你得揣摩出题人的意图。
You need to understand why they set this question in the first place.
“
他想我死。
They want me to die.
”
你知道吗？你最终会变成你讨厌的人。
You know what? You eventually become someone you loathe.
“
借你吉言，我讨厌有钱人。
Thanks, I loathe the rich.
”
国庆去北京旅游有什么好建议吗？
Gonna be traveling in Beijing during the National Day vacation. Any suggestion?
“
别去！
Don't go.
”
等我瘦了就回来找你。
I'll come back for you when I get slim.
“
如果你不想见我，其实可以直说。
You can level with me if you don't want to see me.
”
有史以来最伟大的虚构人物是谁？
Who is the greatest fictional character in history?
“
别人家的小朋友。
Someone else's child.
”
你看看别人家的男朋友
都是吃女朋友吃剩下的饭！！！
Look at other girls' boyfriends. They eat their grilfriends' leftover.
“
那你倒是给我剩点啊！
Sounds as if you ever left any over.
”
为什么秀恩爱通常选择在中午？
Why do people usually publicly display affection at noon?
“
因为早晚会有报应。
Because sooner or later karma will come to them.
”
请用一个词来形容你的男朋友。
Please use one word to describe your boyfriend.
“
哪？
Where?
”
被人追了怎么拒绝？
How do I successfully reject someone who is chasing me?
“
就地卸妆。
Remove your makeup, right now, right there.
”
为了让你好好学习，父母都给过你什么？
What did your parents give you to make you study harder?
“
这张脸。
This face.
”
为什么有的男生追女生追到一半不追了？
Why do some boys give up half-way pursuing a girl?
“
你倒是给个进度条啊。
Why don't you display a progress bar?
”
问世上不会游泳的动物是？
What animals on earth can not swim?
“
媳妇和妈。
Your wife and your mother.
”
你是怎么看节假日堵车的？
What do you think of traffic jams in holidays and festivals?
“
我就在我家电视上看的。
I watch it on TV at home.
”
大雁为什么要飞去南方过冬？
Why do wild geese fly south for the winter?
“
因为走过去太累了。
It's too tired for them to walk there.
”
老师，你教的都是没用的东西！
Sir, what you teach are useless!
“
我不许你这样说自己！
I don't allow you to comment yourself like this!
”
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