「故事·听力」My Mom Shamed Me And I Was Shocked To Find Out The Reason
My Mom Shamed Me And I Was Shocked To Find Out The Reason
Hi, I’m Rose, and my big nose helped me uncover my mother’s secrets and change my family. And I mean big nose literally!
You see, my nose is really big, and I was very ashamed of it. Mainly because my mother would say stuff about it EVERY DAY. “Rose, you should change your haircut to hide your nose,” or “Your nose looks particularly big today.” Of course she said a lot of things about my appearance in general, but my nose was her favorite topic.
What made matters worse is that my mother is GORGEOUS. She could be on the cover of a magazine. I didn't say anything to her, but every time it happened, I would go to my room and destroy something – rip a piece of my clothing or break a pen or something.
I started to use Photoshop and phone apps to make my nose look smaller in photos and I'd post them on Instagram. I had never posted my photos online before. People were reacting very positively and giving me compliments! I knew it wasn’t REALLY me, but it still felt good. And also, one boy from another school, Tyler, started to chat with me regularly and I really liked him.
He liked me too, so we went on a date! I was nervous because he was going to see my real nose. The date was very awkward, and in the end Tyler said “you look so different than in your photos.” I got defensive and started to say things like, “If you don’t wanna see me again, just say it and don’t waste my time!”
Tyler was shocked and said “I mean I really like you, more than in your photos, you look more real, but if you want to be rude to me then I don’t want to see you again.” I apologized immediately and promised that it wouldn’t happen again.
I realized that my nose was fine, it was just my mom who made me think like that. So I started posting my photos without photoshop and I was scared to do it, but nothing changed – people still reacted positively!
I got a little more confidence and it started showing. My mom quickly noticed and she honestly didn’t like it. At all. She doubled down on shaming me. Before, I was just silently breaking something in my room, but now I responded to her very aggressively and loudly: “I’m sorry I’m not as perfect as you are, let me live my life, and stop talking to me!”
My mom got very upset and I think she wanted to cry, but she didn’t show it. We stopped talking. My dad even noticed it, despite the fact that he was working all the time. He sat me down and showed me my mother’s old pictures.
I was shocked because she… also had a big nose, and her face was completely different. She looked like me! Dad explained that Mom was very self-conscious about her appearance and she had multiple plastic surgeries to make herself look like she wanted. It was so weird and I finally understood that my mom was actually so insecure about herself. At first I was happy about it, but then my dad told me how her mother used to shame her the same way that she did to me, and how she and dad were having arguments about it. Then I started to feel really sorry for my mom. That’s why we only saw my grandma like once a year.
I started to talk with my mom more, and I would ask her directly about her plastic surgery and how she felt about herself now, and she was hesitant at first, but she was opening up to me a little bit more. She even stopped making openly mean comments about my nose. Turns out, it was still hard for her to look at herself and she often cried about it.
I can honestly say that it got so much easier to talk with my mom... until our Grandma decided to visit. She would usually come once a year for a week or so.
I had never noticed it before, but Grandma would criticize every little thing that my Mom did or the way she looked. She was so good at making those comments that you wouldn’t have noticed them if you weren’t paying attention. And I was!
During that time, my Mom started making mean comments about me again. She didn’t even realize what was happening, and Dad would stay at work longer just to avoid being in the same room with Grandma.
Then we had a family dinner at a fancy restaurant. And oh, it was so annoying! My Dad and my Mom weren’t even talking because Grandma was whining non-stop. She didn’t like the food, the waiters, and of course, she disliked the dress that my mom chose to wear. And once she started commenting on Mom, she, of course, wouldn’t stop for a long time. It was uncomfortable for everyone, but I wasn’t just uncomfortable, I was ANGRY.
I felt the same way I did when my Mom made comments about my nose. I wanted to break something.
So I did something really weird.
I took pasta from my plate with my hand and threw it at Grandma...