70年前的恋爱鸡汤：奇葩又蠢萌
本文中文翻译为沪江英语原创，未经授权禁止转载
英大前几天在外网发现了一篇鸡汤文，说的是20世纪30年代的约会指南，每一条都准到让人“匪夷所思”。
Don't get drunk
不要喝高了
A 1938 article in Click Parade warned women that getting boozed up on a date was a big no-no. Not only will they appear"silly" rather than "clever," but they'll also embarrass their date.
1938年Click Parade的一篇文章警告：约会时，女士们纵酒狂欢，是大忌。纵酒不仅使得女人们看起来“傻里傻气”，而不是“聪明”，同时也会让约会变得很尴尬。
"The last straw is to pass out from too much liquor. Chancesare, your date will never call you again!" writes Click Parade. That'ssound advice for any era, especially when you risk puking on your date's shoes.
“压倒约会的最后一根稻草，是喝了太多的酒！很有可能，你的约会对象再也不来约你了！”Click Parade的文章写道。
Here's how to cure a hangover naturally.
在任何的情况下，这一点都适用，特别是你要冒着吐得一塌糊涂的风险。
英大：
女生约会时一定要注意仪态！
醉酒，还很容易吃亏。
Have your mom send you flowers
让妈妈送你一束花
In 1938, an article in Mademoiselle in which a Smith College senior advised freshmen about the importance of cultivating an "image of popularity" to get dates.
1938年，史密斯学院的高年级学生发表在Mademoiselle上面的文章，建议大学新生们培养有关“受欢迎的形象”的重要性。
She advised,"During your first term, get home talent to ply you with letters,telegrams, and invitations. College men will think, 'she must be attractive if she can rate all that attention.'"
她建议说：“在大学的第一学期，回家学会熟练的使用信件，电报和邀请函。学校里的男生们会觉得，如果她能吸引到这么多的注意力，她一定非常有魅力。”
She further suggests to have your momsend you flowers to impress men and to shut the lights in your dorm room atnight, so no one will think you're home if you don't have a date. Here's what your favorite flower says about you.
她进一步建议说，让妈妈送你一束花，来增加约会的男人对你的印象。并在晚上关掉你卧室的灯，这样的话，即便是你晚上没有约会，也没有人会认为你在家了。
英大：
欲擒故纵，前辈们玩得可真溜！
Stay mum on the dance floor
跳舞时，保持沉默
Another word of advice from Click Parade was to avoid boring your date with talk about clothes, and to "...flatter your date by talking about the things he wants to talk about."
Click Parade另一建议：“为了避免约会的无聊，不要老是谈论你的衣服。而是要讨好你的约会对象，讲些他感兴趣的话题。”
It also recommends feigning interest in whatever he says. In her 1939 book, How To Winand Hold a Husband, Dorothy Dix puts it more bluntly, "Don't talk too much and, above all, don't talk about yourself, ever. Men have a horror of girls who babble on forever and ever like a brook. Men like to talk about themselves and what they want is an intelligent listener."
文章还建议：要假装对他所说的东西感兴趣。在《如何赢得并留住丈夫的心》一书中，多罗西娅·迪克斯（美国记者）更是直截了当地说：“不要说太多。总之，永远不要讨论你自己。男人们对喋喋不休的女人们深恶痛绝。男人们喜欢谈论自己，而且他们想要一个聪明的聆听者。”
Think again. According to Click Parade you should keep those lips sealed on the dance floor too because "when a man dances hewants to dance."
再想一下，据Click Parade文章说，你要在舞池里最好也把嘴闭上，因为“当男人们跳舞的时候他只是想跳舞。”
There's no crying in dating
约会时，千万别哭
Click Parade recommends you don't turn on the tears in a potential beau's company because men should not have theire motions worked on (how manipulative!), and "men don't like tears,especially in public places."
Click Parade建议：不要在一个可能是花花公子的面前哭泣。“因为男人不会吧情绪表现出来，而且男人也不喜欢眼泪，特别是在公众场合下。”
In her book, Dorothy Dix writes, "Mendo not like sentimental women." Stay strong, ladies! But if you do feel that need to let the tears flow here's why crying may make you feel better.
在她的书中，多罗西娅·迪克斯写道，“男人们不喜欢多愁善感的女人”。记得要坚强，女士们！如果你真的需要流泪的时候，想想为什么流泪会让你感觉好一些。
Chewing gum is a turn-off
吃口香糖是大忌
Fresh breathe, anyone? Stick to mints andnot gum if you want to keep your man happy.
想保持口气清新？如果想让你男人高兴，记得吃薄荷糖，而不是口香糖。
According to the 1938 Click Paradearticle, chewing gum was "not advised," however if you must, it was advisable to do so with your mouth shut. Chomping away like a cow on a piece of Bubble Yum might be frowned upon today as well. That's just bad manners! But maybe not in some countries.
据1938年的Click Parade的文章，咀嚼口香糖并不在“建议范围内”，但如果你必须要吃，那就在吃口香糖的时候，闭嘴不要说话。像个母牛一样用力地咀嚼口香糖，可能会让约会的男人皱起眉头。这太不礼貌了！但，在其它一些国家可能没关系。
Never touch up your makeup
in his rear viewmirror
不要在男人的车后视镜中补妆
Gussy up, of course, but don't make him privy to your routine. Click Parade suggests "to dress in your boudoir to keep your allure," and that includes makeup too.
（约会）当然要化妆！但不要让约会对象看到你的化妆过程。Click Parade文章建议：“在你的闺房里打扮好，并保持住诱惑力”，也包括了你的妆容。
And don't even think about touching up your lipstick in front of him or blotting your lips with his hankie.
不要想在你约会的男人们面前涂口红，或是用他的手帕抹去多余的口红。
And never use the car's rearview mirror to check your makeup because"Men need it to drive and it annoys them very much when they have to runaround to see what's behind them." Smudged mascara will have to wait! Check out the perfect makeup technique for your eye shape.
永远不要用男人的后视镜来检查你的妆容，因为“男人们需要开车，当他们需要去看后面发生了什么的时候，这是件很烦人的事儿”。特别需要注意睫毛膏，如果弄乱了，那就等下再补！
英大：
女生约会都会化妆吗？英大特别想知道...
Waiting isn't a virtue
when it comes todating
在约会的时候，
让人等待不是美德
Click Parade warns, "Don't keep him waiting. Greet him with a smile!" But according to the article you don't want to be so hasty that you forget to wear a brassiere, if you need one that is.
Click Parade文章警告说：“不要让男人们一直等。用微笑来迎接他吧！”但据文章说，如果你忘了穿内衣，那也不必急着去赴会，还是穿好了再去。
Dating etiquette from the 1950s reinforced the message that keeping your date waiting could be a romance buster, but wearing a bra doesn't merit amention.
1950年的约会礼仪强调了这条信息：让你的约会对象一直等待，是浪漫约会的破坏者。但涉及穿没穿内衣的话，“迟到”根本就不值得一提了。
英大：
女生可以“适当迟到”，但不能太过。毕竟，有的男生很不喜欢别人迟到..
但在“原则性”问题面前，迟到就不算什么了！
Don't overdress to impress
不要穿得过分讲究
As important as it is to look good, it's just as strategic to avoid over doing it.
整个人看起来漂亮得体是非常重要的，但这只是约会的策略，千万不能打扮地太过了。
Dix's book, How To Win and Hold a Husband, warns "...she scares him off when she decks herself out in what looks like a million dollars' worth of finery." In other words, he'll think he can't afford to date you .
《如何赢得并留住丈夫的心》一书说：“…当她出来的时候，差点把男人给吓倒了，好像她身上穿了上百万美元的服饰。”换句话说，男人会认为他没有能力跟你约会。
Put down that phone
把电话放下吧
In Dorothy Dix's book she is adamant that girls trying to snag a guy stay away from the telephone. "Don't call a boy up over the telephone during business hours. He will hate you for it, because you are jeopardizing his job... There is no surer way for a girl to make herself unpopular with men than to be a telephone hound."
在迪克斯的书中，她认为女孩试图抓住一切机会，阻止男人挂电话。“不要在上班的时间给男人打电话。他会因此恨你，因为你影响了他工作…让一个女孩子不受男人欢迎，特别有用的办法就是成为一个电话追踪狂。”
英大：
所以，你也别想着，让男票时时刻刻都能第一时间回复你的微信。
Take a trip abroad
去国外旅游
And what of the poor girl who can't get a date? Traveling abroad might be just the ticket—an airplane ticket that is.
一个可怜的女孩子没人约怎么办呢？去国外旅游正是所需要的-就是一机飞机票。
As Dix explains in her book: "Before succumbing to the inevitable she might give herself one more chance by making a change in her environment. Many a girl who is a social failure at home is a success abroad. Many a girl whom the boys on Main Street couldn't see becomes one whom strange men behold with admiration..."
迪克斯在她的书中写道：“之前她屈服与不可改变的东西，有可能会随着环境的改变而变化。许多女生在家里的社交是失败的，但在国外却是成功的。在本国，许多女生走在大街上，会被男生忽略。但在异国他乡，会有陌生男人投来带好感的目光…”
英大：
这就是传说中的“艳遇”！
换个环境，真有利于遇到Mr. Right！
Over 30? Take matters
into your own hands
过了30岁？
你的命运掌握在自己手中
Dix advises women over 30 who want to get hitched to do the courting themselves.
迪克斯建议：30岁以上的，想要结婚的女人，要开始讨好的是自己。
They should "...pick out the particular men they desire to have for husbands and go in for a whirlwind campaign. Virtually any woman can marry any man if she will just go after him hard enough, provided she never lets him suspect that she is being the aggressor."
她们应该…“挑选出她们希望的那个他作为丈夫，然后展开一场旋风般的追求。事实上，任何女人都可以跟自己喜欢的男人结婚，要努力地去追。（要注意的是，）不要让男人怀疑你是一个干扰自己生活的女人”。
Play a good game of bridge
打的一手好桥牌
According to Dix's etiquette guidelines, you shouldn't count on "getting by with a pretty face." You better have a bag of tricks to entertain your guy and keep him interested.
据迪克斯的高端约会指南，女生不能都指望有“一张非常漂亮的脸蛋”。你最好用一些小技巧来取悦和你约会的男人，并让他一直保持对你的兴趣。
She has to know how to be entertaining and amusing; how to dance and play a good game of bridge; how to fit in any company. Only senile grandpas fall for the beautiful but dumb, and Venus herself would be a wallflower if she had to be towed around a ballroom floor or trumped her partner's ace.
女生必须知道如何娱乐和玩耍；要会跳舞、能打一手好牌、知道如何适应一家公司。只有上了年纪的老爷爷才会喜欢漂亮，但很无聊的人。
就连维纳斯自己也只是一个壁花（舞会中没有舞伴，只能坐着看的人）。如果她被拉进舞池，也许能成为拿下她伴侣的王牌。
以上10条建议，哪条最戳中你心？
PS：女生约会前，都会化妆吗？
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编辑：芒果
翻译：Becky
本文图片来自：TATIANA AYAZO/RD.COM,EVERETT COLLECTION/SHUTTERSTOCK