一位身患绝症的阿尔巴尼亚女诗人的三首诗【英汉对照】
Angela Kosta [Albania]
For my mother… (and other two pomes)
I have written several lines and endless verses with my tears, pain of love for her.
Where are you, my mother?
I wish to kiss your eyes with goodness once again!
I want to caress your warm hands just the way you used to do.
I want to feel the wrinkles of your untimely old age with my fingers,
I don’t want to see you in such lethargic condition.
Your grey hair are the witness to eternal suffering;
You are irreplaceable to me,
You are my mother Sophie;
I will always love you endlessly,
Like a goddess,
You will live in my soul;
How can I believe that I will never see you again in this life!
You won't be here anymore;
Didn't you know that you would be in my breath?
How can you die till I am alive?
Your winsome smile reminds me of the glare of the stars.
The universe of nostalgia fascinates me as you have given light to my life
and raised me with the patience of sufferings.
So with great love for your good sake,
Speak up,
Just tell me at least one last word!
How would I live like this?
My mother,
Please read these verses silently.
Don't be silent!
Ah, I wish I could challenge time and the evil of death.
I will destroy the unfortunate fate and drive away the evils.
I'll snuggle in your lap again.
Just as I did, when I was a kid.
The lap, where I found a tranquility and solace.
How happy I was then!
When your hands caressed my soul deeply
And my whole being blossomed.
Mother,
Please don’t go like this to stay beyond the sky.
You are a lady...
You ladies,
A fragile martyr,
Return from the lost path where there is no whisper,
Desperate crying of dirty life,
tears of blood, nail scratched bodies having distressed soul;
You ladies,
Rise!
Stay away from everything that negates the “goddess” in you;
Cross the border of patience and violence
Tear off your faded veil.
The dark eternal mask;
Free yourself from people who don't deserve you,
your moist smile on the lips;
You ladies,
Live again!
Raise your heads
Open fists holding the power of life;
Bloom again to sing...
Smile...
Enjoy your freedom coming out of the prison of hatred.
You ladies!
You are great
You are unique
You are holy;
Enjoy and live happily!
A piece of bread…
A piece of bread
To quench the hunger
For day and night;
A person shouts out for a sad existence,
Searches for it, but fails and finishes in a while.
Being born with the cruel fate, whose fault is it?
Am I to blame myself?
Were we unwanted?
Did we get into the wrong world?
Insatiable hunger,
public negligence,
disappearance of rejoice…
I want to live in clouds and fill myself with air in the universe;
Still the heat from the sun is increasing not enough to melt the frozen blood
and faded heartbeats of my brothers.
The ground beneath your feet;
Where a piece of bread,
Don’t fall apart!
Where is the Jesus who takes care of all?
There is no answer!
I have the piece of bread only except my wealth here.
(Translated by the Indian poet Dilip Mewada)
安吉拉•科斯塔[阿尔巴尼亚］
献给我的母亲……（外二首）
我用我的泪水和爱她的痛苦，写下几行乃至无穷无尽的诗句。
你在哪里，我的母亲？
我愿再一次亲吻您慈祥的双眸！
我想抚摸你温暖的双手，就像你以前那样。
我想用我的手指感受你过早衰老的皱纹、
我不想看到你如此慵懒的样子。
你的白发是苦难永恒的见证；
你对我而言无可替代
你是我的母亲索菲；
我会永远爱你
就像女神一样，
你将活在我的灵魂深处；
我怎么能相信今生再也见不到你？！
你不会在此重现了；
难道你不知道你活在我的呼吸里？
你怎么能在我活着的时候死去？
你迷人的微笑让我想起璀璨的星空。
怀念的宇宙让我着迷，因为你给了我生命的光芒
培育了我对苦难的忍耐。
因了你的缘由，我怀着无比的爱，
大声说出来，
至少告诉我最后一句话！
我该怎么活下去？
我的母亲
请默读这些诗句
不要沉默！
啊，我祈望我能挑战时间和死亡的邪恶。
我要摧毁不幸的命运，驱走邪恶。
我会再次依偎在你的膝上。
就像我小时候一样。
在你的膝上，我找到了宁静和慰藉。
那时我是多么幸福！
当你的双手深深抚摸着我的灵魂
我的整个生命都在绽放。
母亲，
请不要就这样离开，留在天外。
你是一位女士……
女士们
脆弱的殉道者，
从没有窃窃私语的迷途归来，
绝望地哭喊着肮脏的生活，
血泪，被指甲划伤的躯体、痛苦的灵魂；
女士们
起来！
远离一切否定你们内心“女神 ”的东西；
跨越忍耐和暴力的边界
撕下褪色的面纱。
黑暗永恒的面具；
将自己从不配拥有你的人身边解放出来，
你嘴角湿润的微笑；
女士们
重新生活！
抬起你们的头颅
张开拳头，握住生命的力量；
再次绽放歌喉……
微笑……
走出仇恨的牢笼，享受自由。
女士们
你们是伟大的
你们是独一无二的
你们是圣洁的；
尽情享受，快乐生活！
一片面包……
一片面包
填饱肚子
日日夜夜；
一个人为了悲惨的生活而尖叫，
寻寻觅觅，却又失败了，转眼成空！
生来命运残酷，这是谁的错？
我咎由自取吗？
我们是多余的吗？
我们是否来错了世界？
贪得无厌的食欲，
公众的疏忽，
欢乐消失得无影无踪……
我想住在云端，让自己充满宇宙的空气；
太阳的热量依然在上升，却感觉不到冰冻的血液
还有我兄弟们微弱的心跳。
你脚下的土地，
有如一片面包，
不要碎了！
掌管一切的耶稣在哪里？
没有答案！
除了这片面包，我一无所有。
（张智 译；Tr. Zhang Zhi）
About the author
Angela Kosta was born in Albania in 1973. She has been living in Italy since 1995. She has published 9 books: novels, poems and fairy tales in Albanian and Italian. Angela Kosta is deputy editor-in-chief of the international newspaper Albania Press and A New Window. She is also a translator and her publications are seen in various literary magazines and newspapers in Albania, Kosovo and Italy. She writes articles for the Italian newspaper ‘Calabria Live’.
作者简介
安吉拉•科斯塔，1973 年出生于阿尔巴尼亚。自1995 年以来，她一直生活在意大利。她用阿尔巴尼亚语和意大利语出版了9本书：小说、诗歌和童话。安吉拉•科斯塔现任国际报纸《阿尔巴尼亚新闻》和《新窗口》的副主编。她还是一名翻译家，其作品散见于阿尔巴尼亚、科索沃和意大利的各种文学杂志、报纸。她为意大利报纸《卡拉布里亚现场》撰写文章。