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心既能安处处家
Home Can Be Anywhere Your Heart Doesn't Wander
叶子南 著 蔡力坚 译
不久前去一个朋友家吃饭。吃的是北方的水饺，蘸的退山西的陈酷，加上朋友母亲的那口我勉强听懂的山西话，家的感觉洋溢于席间。可饭却吃得并不轻松。
Not long ago, I was invited to a friend’s home for dinner. The main course was dumplings, northern style, seasoned with mature vinegar from his hometown Shanxi. The family ambience was further spiced up by his mother’s hard-to-understand Shanxi dialect. But I had to admit I didn’t feel relaxed.
我这位朋友在高科技公司供职。由于业务不错，为人踏实，加上头上还带着一顶伯克利加大工程学的博士帽，从容地渡过了旧金山南区残酷的裁员潮。时下毫无丢饭碗的危机。他此时本可安心地经营小家庭，但却被“海归“的灿烂图景搅得心烦意乱。陷入了哈姆雷特式的困惑之中：归去，还是不归，这是一个问题。
My friend works in a high-tech firm. A down-to-earth guy, with a knack for technical stuff, plus a PhD in engineering from UC Berkeley, he easily survived the brutal waves of downsizing that swept the Bay Area earlier. His job security no longer in jeopardy, this could be a time to bask in the comfort of family life. But he has lately been tormented by the dreams of a sea turtle, that is, of returning overseas Chinese to make it big in a booming China. He is thus thrown into a Hamlet conundrum: to return or not to return, that’s the question.
有雄心壮志，能在温饱不愁、有车有房的小康中不安现状，这本是无可非议的，甚至有些高尚。既然古化的老龄人都能“志在千里”，现代的青年人面对彼岸的滚滚红尘岂能不摩拳擦掌。我之所以对“海归”热潮很有保留。井非因为上面那种近乎崇高的动机。我观“海归“,更看重微观的权衡，而不轻信宏观的诱惑。图景固然灿烂，实践却是另一番景象。
Ambition is an urge to do better. There’s nothing wrong with such an urge even when you are already enjoying a decent level of material comfort. There’s in fact an aura of nobility surrounding it. When old folks in ancient times aspired to go a thousand miles to meet new challenges, how can today s young people flinch from venturing into the excitement on the other side of the Pacific Ocean? Rather than out of concern about their motives, which are admirable, my reservation about the tide of returning sea turtles is framed on a micro level around the need to be on guard against any grandiose temptation. In spite of seemingly irresistible promises, reality may prove otherwise.
“海归”面对的问题不少，其中一个就是家。在那些已获居住权的人中，举家归国，从此斩断与美国“情缘” 的毕竟很少，“我挥一挥衣袖。不带走一片云彩”是诗句，不是现实。有人说，家的解决之道是“两边跑”，仿佛一个家庭真可以转换成旅游团队，不停地穿梭于大洋两岸。但在“两边跑”的模式果真能营造出家的温馨？我看家的真正含义反倒会在舟车劳顿中消失殆尽。
There are a whole lot of issues one may face, and chief among them is where their families would stay. For those who have green cards, few would actually move a whole family back and sever their American bonds. Another scenario is to leave your family behind, as is described poetically: Gently I flick my sleeves, 1 Not even a wisp of cloud will I bring away. This alternative is, however, not realistic, though poetically appealing. Some claim that a solution lies in back-and- forth shuttling. Family members would be like tour groups shuttling across the Pacific. But can this shuttle approach" create the warmth of family? Tm afraid the meaning of family could be lost all together in the never-ending hustle of travelling.
家必须先要由近距离来呵护。这倒不是说天南海北间就一定不能编织出亲情的网络，我们的文化确有千里共婵娟的佳话。但隔洋的卿卿我我，网络的音容笑貌毕竟无法取代饭桌上的闲聊，庭院中的嬉笑。虚拟的空间无法给你鲜活的人生体验，让你报偿家庭的苦辣酸甜。
The strength of a family is first and foremost maintained by the proximity of its members. It doesn’t follow that intimacy can never be sustained across opposite corners of the earth. There are indeed stories about long distance ties in our culture. But trans-Pacific communication via online platforms offers no viable replacement for dinner table chats or backyard echoes of laughter. Virtual space cannot give you real-life experience, nor can it let you have a true taste of family life, be it bitter, spicy, sour, or sweet.
在我来说，家是傍晚妻子该回家却仍未到时的一份急切, 家是女儿该睡觉却仍看书时的一点担忧；家是将液体皂误放入烘干机后妻子的责怪，家是烧新菜意外成功时全家的雀跃；家是晨起送孩子上学时的忙碌，家是为女儿选大学时的掂量。家当然也是与妻子偶尔的怄气，与女儿短暂的争吵。但总体上家是安逸闲适、少有浪花的小溪，是人生失意时抚伤止痛的疗养院，是事业挫败后重整旗鼓的加油站。家的温暖冲淡了远行人的乡然与客愁，于是故国仅是偶尔欢聚的天堂，他乡竟成了终老的地方。
For me, the meaning of family lies in feeling anxious about my wife s failure to come home at the usual time or in feeling worried about our daughter staying up late studying. It lies in my wife’s complaint that I shouldn’t have misplaced detergent in the dryer, in the joy everyone in our family shares when our experiment of cooking a new dish turned out a success, in the hustle of getting our kid ready for school in the morning, or in our discussion on picking a right college for our daughter. Family life is also flavored with occasional quarrels I have with my wife or daughter. For all its trivial disturbances, a family is like a small river free of billowing waves, where you can enjoy peace and calm. It’s a shelter where you can recuperate from life’s cuts and bruises. It’s a resupply station where you can prepare yourself to bounce back after a career disaster. The warmth of family dilutes feelings of nostalgia for our home town, which now has become a paradise for occasional reunions, while the once unfamiliar land a place to call home for the rest of my life.
其实，是回去发展，还是留美生活，不是一个对错的选择。但若决定回去，最好是“携妇将雏”，因为家不可能从远处经营，必得在近处栽培。我的这位朋友很谨慎，一直还在犹像当中。原因无非是孩子的教育，太太的安排，算是很顾家的人。希望他做出一个能让他饱尝家庭温馨的决定。
In fact, to return or to stay, it’s not a question of right and wrong. If you decide to return, you’d better take your whole family with you. A family cannot be run from afar. Proximity begets intimacy. My friend is a very cautious and considerate family man. He has been hesitating over concerns about his kid’s education and his wife’s job. I hope he will make a sensible decision that would ensure him uninterrupted embrace of family love.
不久前，收到表姐的信。她看了我的一篇有关江南的散文，抱病为我写了一首七绝，算是对我的鼓励。远在异乡的我阅后很有共鸣：
A few days ago, I got a message from my hometown cousin. In response to my essay on the beauty of the land south the Yangtze River, she wrote a four-line poem for me, as encouragement to my dabbling in literary pursuits, which resonates with me:
江南细雨润天涯，心既能安处处家。岁岁潮平秋月白,加州东海本通槎。
The drizzles hither also moisten the wide blue yonder, / And home can be anywhere your heart doesn’t wander; / There’s a time the tide ebbs and the mid-autumn moon shines, / Highlighting the link between California and east China shorelines.
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